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420 Dispensary Deals in Durango

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In the Colorado cannabis industry, “April” is synonymous with “insanity.” It’s just a fact. For us, April is like someone took Christmas and stuffed it with the 4th of July and then wrapped it with a birthday. It really is that awesome because April is the beginning of our cannabis award season, it’s the when all the tourists start flocking to our beautiful state (when they aren’t hobbled by stay-at-home orders), and it’s smackdab in the middle of spring, which goes hand-in-hand with the “flowers” we sell. And this April is going to be crazier than previous Aprils because since it’s 2020, the entire month will be 4/20 (if you’re still a little hazy on why “420” is such a big deal, click HERE for a history lesson).

Granted, this April is obviously a bit different given that there’s a pesky global pandemic dampening everyone’s spirits, but we’re going to stay safe and happy, no matter what. So, before I get to the 4/20 specials we’ll be running, please click HERE to read last week’s blog that explains the new way to shop here during this bizarre time (which will help tons, because we’re going to be ridiculously busy, so if you know the new protocols, it will cut down your wait time).

Alright; here are the deals we’re running on 4/20, which is insanity incarnate. I promise that our shop will be the best one to hit on the special day, but I cannot make any promises about the line. And just to make things safer due to Covid-19, we’ll have lines marked on the ground that are six feet apart. We’ll also have the best weed at the best prices on April 20th, and the people next to you in line will surely be cool, so come hang out. If you do, these deals are waiting for you:

4/20

  • All Moroccan and Lebanese Hash will be 50% off, which is exactly the insanity I was talking about.
  • A few of our best Greenery Grown strains will be $7 per gram, $25 per eighth, $45 per quarter, and $85 per half-ounce (which is more than 50% off).
  • And if that’s not good enough, everything full-price in the store will be 20% off. So… everything in the store will be on sale for 20% off… 4/20% off… get it???
  • And if you think that’s cheesy, just wait. On 4/20, you’ll also be able to pick up 4 joints for $20, because we can’t help ourselves when it comes to the numbers “4” or “20” on 4/20.
  • All Incredibles bars will be 25% off, but this special will run all month long
  • Lastly, all 1906 chocolates will be “buy one, get one for $1,” and this is a month-long special as well.

As of right now, that’s all we have planned for 4/20, but I promise you something else will pop up. We always get carried away when it comes to sales because the only thing more fun than selling legal weed is doing so at a discount, so we’ll probably end up adding a surprise or two to the lineup. So please, come see us, because when it comes to 4/20, We’re Your Best Buds!

The THC Classic

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I’m still getting used to the idea of marijuana business trips. The business trip part is simple enough because I did that for over a decade—I got used to the slacks and nice shirts, the hotels and continental breakfasts, the company bar tabs and small talk. And when you think about it, nothing should change if you throw marijuana into the mix because legalized marijuana has created a business that’s just as legitimate as all the others, but it’s still weird. Thus far, I’ve been on four business trips for our marijuana company, and I’m planning my fifth. I grab my business cards and my laptop and my nice shirts just like I used to, and I travel around selling commodities to business owners just like I used to. And it was all getting workaday just like it used to be, starting to feel normal, but during the last week of March, I went on a business trip that would remind me of just how odd this whole thing really is.

Long story short, we decided to enter a few products from our Greenery Hash Factory in The THC Classic that’s put on annually by Rooster Magazine. We’d never entered a competition like this one before because we thought going up against the big guys might be tilting at windmills; some of those companies operate chains of dispensaries and concentrate production facilities that’ve been open since the beginning. So, when we got the call that we’d need to show up to accept our awards, it seemed a bit surreal. But we shifted schedules here in the shop so the Hash Factory could go as a team, we grabbed our business cards and laptops, and we hit the road for Denver.

We checked into our hotel and grabbed a bite to eat. We called an Uber and headed down to the Temple Nightclub, where the award ceremony would be held. Our Uber driver was from Morocco, which we took to be a good sign because one of our contest entries was our Moroccan Hash, but we still didn’t know what to expect. When we showed up, the scene was exactly what you’d expect at a nightclub: there were red ropes and a line, there were irritable bouncers and flashing lights, and there were party girls dressed in grass skirts and coconut braziers who were obviously paid to be there. We waited in line, endured the pat-down, and then walked into a thumping nightclub that was packed with 1,000 people who worked in the cannabis industry. It was crazy.

Cheech Marin (from Cheech and Chong) was rumored to be somewhere in the crowd, but I never saw the guy, but two of my team members got a picture with Afroman who ended up playing a concert to close out the night. A little later, the award ceremony started, with speeches and applause exactly like you’d expect, and we ended up taking home two trophies, one for our Caviar, and one for our Lebanese Hash. Isn’t that insane? Not that long ago, we’d be locked up for making hash and distributing it across Colorado, but now, we get to walk onto a stage, shake hands with the guy holding a microphone, and then hold our trophies high as a crowd of 1,000 marijuana professionals cheer our accomplishment. It was one hell of a day.

To back up a bit, “caviar” is marijuana flower that has been coated in hash oil and kief, and Lebanese Hash is an old-school concentrate that’s made from pressed kief, just like the stuff that was smuggled into the States way-back-when. And I’m not just talking about this stuff because of the two new trophies that are sitting in our Durango dispensary; you can also buy our hash, and if you’re in Durango, you’ll need to come to us because we’re the only people in town selling it. Just be prepared to hear us call our hash “award-winning,” because we now have a couple trophies to prove that we really are Your Best Buds!

hash,

Ordering Marijuana Online

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Just to be clear, you cannot order marijuana from us online and have it shipped to you. About one out of every five calls that comes into our Durango dispensary is from someone who wants me to ship pot, but if I said “yes,” I’d have to start writing these things from jail. And in an odd little twist, the product we get shipping requests for the most is the Foria Pleasure (it’s a sex spray). I’ve gotten calls from old-lady book clubs in New York and lonely men in South Africa looking to have this stuff shipped, and I had to tell them all the same thing I told you in the first sentence (but it’s much more comfortable this way). But now that we’ve gotten that disclaimer out of the way, there’s something new and exciting I need to tell you: from now on, you’ll be able to make online orders that we can get ready and set aside for you to pick up later. For real, to do it, just click HERE.

Isn’t that crazy? People come in everyday with mind-blown looks on their faces because buying legal weed is still novel to them. I’ve become desensitized to it for obvious reasons, but when something new like online ordering comes along, it makes me remember how odd this whole thing can be. Think about it: you can peruse our menu online while you’re half-dressed on your couch and click the things you want. When you place an order, a little receipt machine that sits behind me spits out your order, and I grab it before running in the back with a paper bag. I fill your order, send you a nifty little message saying it’s ready, and then you come in to pick it up (after putting on pants).

But please, remember your purchasing limits, because the system will let you order as much as you want, but you can only buy so much. The easiest way to think about it is that you’re allowed 8 pieces of pie, and an eighth of flower, or 1 gram of concentrate, or 100mg worth of an edible counts as one piece. So, hypothetically, you could order a half-ounce of pot, 2 grams of hash, and two edible packs and be good to go. Get it? That being said, our online ordering platform allows us to communicate with you via text, so if you put too much in your cart, we’ll let you know. And if for some weird reason, we run out of something you want, we can chat and offer you alternatives, all through texts. Isn’t that crazy-awesome?

So yeah… that’s everything you need to know about online marijuana ordering from our Durango dispensary. This is where I’d usually say something like “come on down to The Greenery to see our awesome selection,” but today, I’m going to tell you to do it from your couch to avoid the lines. So, click HERE, pick out want you want, put it in your cart, and then come see us, because if you’re an online shopper, We’re Your Best Buds, too!

420 Deals in Durango

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I told you about the 420 origin story last year, but here’s a refresher: back in the early 70’s, a group of Californian kids called the “Waldos” would get together after track practice at 4:20pm to smoke at a local park; the tradition spread across their town and then the whole world. It’s that simple. But really, where 420 came from isn’t nearly as important as what it’s become. Now, April 20th is the cornerstone of the “Holidaze,” which is a month-long celebration of everything cannabis-related. April in Colorado is wonderful because there seems to be a cannabis party on every corner, a cannabis industry event in every convention center, and our Durango dispensary is entering this month on a high because our Hash Factory won two awards in the THC Classic, which is the official kickoff to April. We’ve been keeping that momentum going all month long.

If you were lucky enough to come in on the 10th for our 4th anniversary party, you know exactly what I’m talking about. That day was insane. We had a radio station out front spreading the word, we had deals galore, and we spent the day celebrating the Holidaze with a line that went out the door. We also had a drawing for an awesome prize basket, we made a ton of new friends, and this April 20th, we’re doing it all again, but bigger and better. There will be a deal or two that I won’t talk about in this blog because we’d like to save at least one surprise for when you come in, but I’ll tell you about everything else—we’re running so many specials that I’ll need to break them down into categories for you:

1.) Flower. Every single strain we sell will be 20% off for 4/20. I’m not saying this just because I work here, but honestly, our flower is the best in town, so 20% off is a big deal. Secondly, we’re going to have an ounce-special. This is something we’ve never done before, but on 4/20, you’ll be able to pick up a prepackaged ounce of quality flower for an awesome price (you’ll need to call or come in to figure out what it is). And lastly, you’ll be able to snag 4, one-gram pre-rolls for $20 (limit one per customer), which works out to be a 50% savings.

2.) Hash. Remember when I told you about our win at The THC Classic? Well, one of the shiny trophies you’ll see when you come into our shop is for our hash, and on 420, all the hash from our Hash Factory will also be 20% off, which is a superb deal on an award-winning concentrate like our Lebanese Hash.

3.) Edibles. We’re running a buy one, get one free sale this 4/20 on all three varieties of Ripple, which is a little crazy on our part because Ripple is already one of our bestselling edibles. I wrote a blog about Ripple that you can read HERE if you need more info, but basically, Ripple is a tasteless, odorless, instantly-dissolvable powder you can add to any food or drink; it lets you infuse anything with THC. If you haven’t tried this stuff, you need to, and it’ll never be more affordable than it will be on 4/20. Plus, this includes their line of gummies.

4.) Schwag. We’ll be giving away promotional stuff until we run out, but we’ve also put together a gift basket that’s worth over $100 for which we’re having a drawing. No purchase is necessary to enter, and you don’t need to be present to win. Just come in, fill out one of those little paper slips, and then put it in the big glass jar. I’ll draw out a name the Monday after 4/20 and give you a call if you win. Fun, right?

So please, this 4/20, come see us. We’re running the best deals on the best products, and given that we were the first recreational-only dispensary in Durango, and the one with the highest rating, we really are Your Best Buds for 420!

The Greenery’s 4th Anniversary

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We’ve been selling legal weed for four years! Isn’t that crazy? This is all starting to seem like a regular job, one where our staff feels like a family thanks to all these successful years together, and even though this’ll sound cheesy, it’s all because of you, our customers. Some of you are regulars who’ve been coming in since day one, and some of you are first-timers who remind us how exciting legal cannabis can be with your smiles when you walk in. Either way, we wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for our customers, so, we’re going to do something special for you on our anniversary.

Usually, the traditional gifts for a fourth wedding anniversary are linen, silk, fruit, and flowers, and in a way, we’re married to our customers because we couldn’t live without you guys. That being said, we’re not going to give you linen, silk, or fruit because that would be a weird gift from a weed shop, but the “flowers” we sell are a different story completely. So, this April 10th, for the fourth anniversary of our Durango dispensary, here are the deals we’re giving to our customers to say thank you, and happy anniversary!

1.) All flower will be 20% off (see what I mean about flowers?).

2.) All concentrates will be 15% off (because our anniversary falls on Waxy Wednesday, which is awesome).

3.) All solventless hash from The Greenery Hash Factory will be 20% off.

4.) All Sweet products will be buy one, get one 50% off.

5.) For our anniversary, you’ll be able to buy four, one-gram pre-rolls for $20 (limit: one time per customer). Since it’s our fourth anniversary, “four-for-twenty” sounded perfect.

6.) If you haven’t signed up for our Loyalty Program, you need to, because during our anniversary party, all loyalty customers will receive double points.

7.) We’re also running a spectacular deal on one of our edibles, buy one, get one free on all Ripple products.

See? We love you guys a whole bunch, so we went a bit crazy with our deals. We’re even gunna have our favorite radio station X-Rock here doing a live broadcast from our parking lot, we’ll be giving out swag while it lasts, and I’m sure balloons will be involved somehow. We can’t tell you how much we appreciate your business over the years, so we’re going to do our best to show it, because even though I usually end these blogs with “We’re Your Best Buds,” the truth is that You’re Our Best Buds!

Dry Marijuana

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When people complain about how dry all the pot in Colorado is, I wonder to myself if the same people complain about food that tastes too good or about weekends that last too long. Let me explain…

At sea level, where most people grew up, cannabis stays moist long after it’s harvested; that’s why most of us remember sticky pot from our youths. So, at sea level, if you got some bone-dry pot, there was a good chance it’d been sitting around for a while, and that’s why most people equate dry pot with old pot (which is bad pot). However, Colorado is just about the antithesis of “sea level,” and thanks to our altitude, pot dries out quickly. It’s an elevation thing, not a quality or age thing, but it’s difficult to change opinions once they’ve formed—that’s why this week, I wanted to talk about Colorado’s dryer-than-everywhere-else marijuana to set the record straight.

So, let me reiterate: the only thing wrong with dry marijuana is that it might be old if you find it somewhere that’s close to sea level like California, but if you find dry marijuana in Colorado, it’s because you’re more than a mile above the sea, and here, plants dry out quickly. That’s just the way it is. But here’s the important part: dry pot is actually a good thing because it weighs less, so you get more. If you were to buy an eighth (3.5 grams) of dry marijuana and set it next to an eighth of moist marijuana that weighed the same, the dry eighth would look much larger thanks to less water weight (as an aside, I apologize for already using the word “moist” twice in this blog, but it’s a necessary evil). Do you see what I’m getting at? If you can get over that old-school paradigm of “dry pot = old pot,” you’ll realize that you’re actually getting more for your buck when you buy dry pot because you get more marijuana and less water. Ask yourself this: do you want to smoke water, or do you want to smoke cannabis? Exactly.

Alright… after reading that, I’m sure you thought something like, “well yeah, but how do I know if the dry marijuana I buy in your Durango dispensary isn’t just old pot you’re trying to blame on Colorado’s elevation?” Well, good question, but I’ve got an answer for you: we wouldn’t do that. Ever. We both purchase and grow our cannabis in small batches to ensure freshness, and we keep our flower sealed tightly before we bring it onto the floor.

But there’s a second reason I wanted to write this blog, and it deals with one of the most common questions I get: “how do you rehydrate dry pot?” (this is important to a few smokers because hydrated pot burns a bit more slowly). Well, the way most people do this is by sealing a fresh piece of bread in with their flower. The moisture from the bread will rehydrate the flower and make it sticky just like you remember. That being said, please don’t do this. For one, your pot will taste a bit like bread, and two, if there’s even the slightest amount of mold on your bread, it can spread to your weed, and smoking mold isn’t good for you. So, instead, try a two-way humidity control pack.

In our Durango dispensary, we use Boveda packs, which you can read about by clicking THIS link. I’d recommend using the 62% version, but basically, a “two-way” pack works in two ways (duh). If your pot gets too dry, these packs will add moisture, but if the moisture gets too high, these packs will take it back out for that perfect balance. So, if you seal a 62% Boveda pack in with your flower, you’ll keep all your flower at the perfect moistness (is that four times using the word?) for as long as the pack keeps working, which is a long time. That way, if you buy a dry eighth which is good because you get more pot, you can take it home, rehydrate it with your Boveda pack (which won’t make it mold or taste like bread), and you’ll get the best of both worlds: you’ll get more flower weight because you bought it dry, but the Boveda will make your flower sticky just like you remember from your sea-level childhood.

But as always, if you have questions, it’s always best to give us a call at (970) 403-3710 or come see us (with your valid I.D. proving that you’re 21or over) at 208 Parker Avenue right here in Bodo park. We’ll tell you everything you need to know about rehydrating your marijuana if you want it to be sticky and burn slow like you remember. And we’ll prove to you that our marijuana is fresh (and the best in town), because We’re Your Best Buds!

A Good Day with Cannabis

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Do you remember that “It Was a Good Day” song by Ice Cube? If not, it’s a classic, and you need to listen to it immediately, but if you do, I apologize for getting it stuck in your head. But the reason I ask is that recently, I read a news story wherein a bunch of rap nerds got together and figured out exactly which day Ice Cube was talking about: it was January 20th, 1992.

They used all the clues in the song to figure it out: there was “no smog,” Yo! MTV Raps was on TV, the Lakers beat the Super Sonics, and Ice Cube got a page on his beeper from Kim. If you figure out the song’s release date, look at the years when beepers were used, check the stats for Lakers wins, and the weather report for smog, you get the exact “good day.” Of course, back in 2012 when Ice Cube gave an interview about the song, he said it was a fictional day, but that’s not why I’m writing this: in his song, Ice Cube mentions the “chronic,” which is a prerequisite for any “good day.” That got me thinking about the perfect day with cannabis—a day you can plan and enjoy intentionally, because sometimes, good days need to be forced. So, if I were to plan the perfect day with cannabis, this is how I’d do it:

Step one, wake-and-bake. There’s nothing wrong with pot in the morning, and anyone who says otherwise hasn’t tried it. On lazy Sundays, I like to wake up with a good Bubble Gum joint, or something else sativa-dominant, and we sell them for $10 out-the-door here in our Durango dispensary. And then after I put out my joint to save for later (smoking an entire gram in the morning might cut the day a bit short), I’d mix a packet of Lucky Turtle 1:1 Honey into my coffee. These single serving packs of honey cost $9, and they deliver 10mg of THC and CBD. Granted, if you’d prefer fewer than 10mg in the morning (or if you don’t like overly-sweet coffee), just use half the packet. And timing is important: the high from your joint will last about an hour and a half, and it’ll take the honey about an hour and a half to kick in fully, so drink that coffee right after you put down the joint—for the perfect good day, a high must be maintained.

The next step would be to go out and see the world. I like having my wife drive me around to thrift shops and breakfast places while I marvel at the bright day, couched comfortably in my buzz (but if you stop for breakfast, remember, there’s nothing wrong with bacon even though Ice Cube’s good day started when mom cooked breakfast with “no hog”). Then we go home to do chores and watch daytime TV; this is when my vape pen comes into play. I like to keep a terpene-rich distillate pen in my pocket, something like the Craft Reserve from O.pen that’s on our menu, and I lean towards the hybrid side of things as the day creeps by. I’ll take a puff or two when normalcy starts to creep back in, and it’ll carry me through to lunch when I smash a BLT and then load a bowl. Just like with the vape pen, my midday bowl is always a perfect hybrid, something like Blue Dream, because that even balance between mental energy and physical relaxation pairs perfectly with noontime.

This is when I start watching something campy like “Ancient Aliens” (as it turns out, the History Channel would have you believe aliens are responsible for just about everything except pot). As the day gets older, I smoke and vape as needed, but if you’re a fan of baths, I’d recommend throwing some THC bath salt into the mix. We sell a rejuvenating bath salt that’s infused with eucalyptus and cannabis, it’ll soothe you until nighttime rolls around, because that’s when it’s time to kick things up a notch.

Next, for dark nights, I like dark hash, like a good Moroccan or an Indica-dominant bubble hash. And that’s pretty convenient given that we operate our own Hash Factory, and we’re the only company in Colorado that manufactures and distributes classic concentrates such as Moroccan or Lebanese hash. So, to start my perfect evening to cap off that good day, I’d throw a pinch of Moroccan on top of a deep Indica like Pakistani Chitral Kush, smoke it, and then wait for the mind-numbing, body sedating high to knock me down into the couch (these days, it’s the only way to make the nightly news bearable). And then right before bed, I’d eat a brownie from Love’s Oven. They’re made with canna-butter which is difficult to find these days, they totally count as a desert, and the relaxing high would keep me sleeping through the night. Boom; the perfect end to a good day with cannabis (and there’s no law saying you can’t have two days like this in a row, so wake up and repeat as necessary).

But this good day isn’t possible without cannabis, so come see us first. We’re located at 208 Parker Avenue right here in Durango, and we’re open every day (for hours, click HERE). Just make sure to bring your valid, government-issued I.D. proving that you’re 21 or older, because good days with cannabis are for grownups only. And remember, We’re Your Best Buds!

Tolerance Break

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In my humble opinion, the only thing wrong with smoking pot is that after a while, it’ll stop working. The THC in cannabis is just like any other intoxicant in that your body will build up a tolerance over time, which is annoying. And frankly, that’s the boat I’m in right now. I work in a dispensary (obviously), so I’m usually swimming in flower (I’m spoiled) and I smoke regularly. As such, I’ve built up that dreaded tolerance, and I’m about to take a drastic step to fix my problem: I’m going to take a tolerance break.

Simply put, a “tolerance break” is a period of time wherein you don’t consume cannabis so your tolerance goes away. There’s a ton of science behind it (for more, please read my blog on the endocannabinoid system HERE), but basically, taking a break from pot lets your ECS receptors become more receptive to cannabinoids. And then when you fall back off the wagon, your fresh receptors soak up all that lovely THC and you get a high that feels just like the first time. However, the duration of a tolerance break differs depending on the amount you smoke. So, if you’re a smoker who takes a puff or two at night, a day off will work, but if you’re an all-day type of smoker, you’ll need to take a week-long tolerance break for the best effect (mine will probably need to last a decade to work).

Sounds horrible, right? Well, believe it or not, you can be proactive and take mini tolerance breaks to make it so your tolerance doesn’t get too high in the first place. Most people do this by designating a day to stay away from cannabis, like “sober Sunday,” and it works well (but please don’t choose Monday because that day sucks enough as it is). However, this isn’t possible for some people, even though that might sound a bit alien to you if you’re not one of them. A lot of people use cannabis as their medicine, and as such, a day without isn’t feasible. So, if you’re in this boat, I’d recommend giving targeted groups of receptors a tolerance break.

You can read a peer-reviewed study HERE if you’d like, but basically, ECS receptors are located throughout the body, and there’s a high concentration of them in the digestive system. Do you see what I’m getting at? If you use cannabis, but smoking it isn’t as effective as it used to be, give your lungs a break and switch to edibles for a while. And then when that gets old, go back to smoking. Doing so will let you get the most out of your cannabis because you’ll always have a fresh group of receptors to switch to once a certain group builds up a tolerance. And if you need a third option, try a transdermal cannabis product.

Believe it or not, we sell THC-infused transdermal patches from Mary’s Medicinals (these things are just like nicotine patches, but they get you high, which is way better than nicotine). All you need to do is clean a venous area of your body (like the inner-wrist or the top of your foot), slap on a patch, and then wait for the effect. The high that comes from a patch isn’t as intense as something you’d get from flower or edibles, but it lasts much longer (it’ll keep you where you need to be for 8 to 12 hours). So, if you throw patches into the equation, you can rotate between your lungs, stomach, and skin to make sure no one group of receptors gets too much THC.

Lastly, did you notice that you just read a dispensary blog that suggested taking a break from smoking? Isn’t that a little odd given that it’s my job to get you in to our Durango dispensary to spend money? In saying this, I simply wanted to point out that most shops will tell you to just smoke more pot if your tolerance builds up because those shops just want your money—we want you to have the best possible experience with the cannabis you buy here, because we’re different; that’s why We’re Your Best Buds!

Bringing Back the Old-School

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It’s a tired platitude, but necessity really is the mother of all invention. And back in the good ol’ days, there was plenty of “necessity” lying around when it came to cannabis because you couldn’t simply walk into a store like our Durango dispensary and buy weed; those were dark times. And it was just as difficult at times to find paraphernalia because headshops weren’t as ubiquitous as they are now. So, if you were lucky enough to score some pot from “a guy” but you didn’t have a pipe, you had to get creative. Or, if you had a pipe but no weed, you had to do the same. Granted, all of that is gone now because we have more dispensaries in Colorado than we do Starbucks and McDonald’s locations combined, but a few of those tricks from the old days are worth holding onto even though they aren’t necessary. Let me explain.

Let’s start with the “have a pipe but no weed scenario.” Back in the day, when we ran out, we’d scrape our pipes, collect the sticky black resin, and then smoke it. Resin burns like tar and the high is sedating like a hash-high, but it’s kinda gross. However, there was a silver lining to that tar-black cloud: most people walked around with clean pipes thanks to the times when they ran out. Nowadays, since pot is everywhere, people walk around with dirty pipes, which is just as bad as smoking resin. The heat from your lighter burns a bit of the buildup under the bowl, and all your pot starts to taste the same. So, two pieces of advice: clean your bowl regularly, and your pipe occasionally. Right after smoking, while the bowl is still warm, shove a paper towel down into the bowl and twist it; doing so will clean out all the resin and leave a fresh bowl for the next session. And if you notice that your hits start to taste a bit musky, boil your pipe in some hot water (or soak it in a solution of rubbing alcohol and salt) to clean out all that resin that we used to collect and smoke. Your taste buds will thank you.

Now, the “have pot but not a pipe” scenario is much more fun. I’ve made pipes out of everything from soda cans to fish tanks, even though the former probably took a couple years off my life because of the paint on the can and the latter was a bit ridiculous. And nowadays, there’s really no excuse to not a have a pipe (we sell a few for eight bucks in our shop), but you never know, it could happen (especially if you’re clumsy and you have a glass pipe). So, as a suggestion, smoke out of an apple.

Yeah, it sounds weird, but I’m sure you’ve heard older stoners talk about apple pipes, and old people usually know what they’re talking about. Step 1: pull the stem out of the apple, and then shove a pen down into the core. Don’t use the tip, and press it in until it goes almost all the way through. Step 2: press your pen into the top of the apple until the two holes in the apple meet, and then dig out a little bowl at the top of the second hole. Step 3: put some flower into the bowl, and then smoke it (by inhaling through the first hole). An apple pipe is obviously a one-time thing, but there’s an added bonus: the hits taste like apples. Fun, right?

But I know what you’re thinking: this is pointless because they sell papers at gas stations and you’d take a joint over smoking out of an apple any day. True. But because nobody runs out of joints these days (they’re $10 each in our shop and a gram a piece), something else from the old-school is being lost: generation joints.

Back in the day, we’d throw all our roaches (the small, leftover part of the joint that’s hard to smoke) into a pill bottle. When we ran out of flower, we’d bust out that pill bottle, break open all the roaches, and then roll all the flower into a “generation joint,” which is named thusly because it’s the second time, or “generation,” that the flower has been smoked. The flower in a roach is coated with resin, which is nothing more than activated THC, so it’s more potent; the high is much deeper and stronger with a generation joint than with a regular joint. These days, all the pre-rolls you buy in a dispensary have a crutch in the tip (a little rolled piece of cardboard that works as a mouthpiece), so it’s much easier to smoke all the flower in a modern-day joint, but if you find that there’s a little bit left over, I’d listen to me and get a pill bottle. Generation joints need to be brought back by all you millennials because they’re wonderful.

Alright, now on to something interesting: heel hash. This will sound disgusting but bear with me. Way-back-when, you couldn’t just walk into a store and buy hash. I know; it sounds crazy, but it’s true. So, we’d collect kief (all the crystals that fall off the flower in the container or collects on the screen in your grinder). And then we’d put the kief into a cellophane bag (like the one that comes on a pack of cigarettes), fold-up and tape the bag so it was sealed, and then put it in the bottom of a shoe. If you walk around on it all day, the heat and repeated pressure would turn the kief into hash… don’t judge me.

Or better yet, if you take that kief, put it in between two pieces of parchment paper and then press it with a hair straightener, you can make rosin at home (a full-burn hash you can dab), which is perfectly legal to do. Yeah, this tidbit is a little pointless as well given that we sell professionally-made rosin in our shop for $30 per gram out-the-door and you won’t need a hair straightener, but who knows? Maybe you have a bunch of kief in your stashbox and you’re looking for something to do. If so, you’re welcome.

See? Some of the things we came up with before cannabis was legalized in Colorado are worth keeping even though they’re no longer necessary—after all, you shouldn’t throw the baby out with the bong water (or something like that). And just about everyone who works at The Greenery has been around the block per the ways of an old-school smoker, so if you’d like some advice on homemade pipes, or if you’d like to come buy some kief for homemade hash, come see us at 208 Parker avenue and bring your valid I.D. proving that you’re 21 or older. We’ll send you on your way with a few old-school tips, because We’re Your Best Buds!

Cannabis Dinner Parties

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Cannabis dinner parties. They exist. And I mean, why not? Pot is just like everything else in our culture in that trendy things come and go, and right now, cannabis dinner parties are pretty popular. The big cities even have licensed chefs on Craigslist who will come into your home and do all the cooking for you; they’ll create three-course meals centered on infused edibles and they’ll dole out some cannabis education while they’re at it. Sure, that sounds fun, but it also sounds expensive, and Durango isn’t one of those “big cities” in the first place. So, if you live in a mountain town like ours and you want to throw a cannabis dinner party, you must do it yourself.

I’m going to tell you exactly how to do it, but first, I need to drop a few disclaimers. For one, if you plan on throwing a cannabis dinner party, please make sure all your guests designate a driver. It’s just as illegal to drive under the influence of cannabis as it is when it comes to alcohol, and it’s dangerous, so do the grownup thing. Secondly, edibles can take up to an hour to kick in, so please keep that in mind, and communicate this fact to all your guests. Trust me, you don’t want your friends to overindulge in the beginning, because by the end of dinner, they’ll turn into drooling zombies who won’t get off your couch. You don’t want that. Third, the state-recommended serving size is 10mg, so you’ll want to design your dinner in a way that makes it so a guest can enjoy all three courses without exceeding 10mg total THC—this can be a bit tricky to do, but don’t worry, I’ll walk you through it. And for the record, there’s nothing wrong with consuming more than 10mg of THC, just like there’s nothing wrong with having more than one beer. It’s just important to know your preferred serving size when it comes to THC, and if any of your guests are newbies, it’s important to keep things in check so they have a good time. And lastly, it’s important to offer non-infused options for those designated drivers; the only thing worse than not being able to get high is not being able to eat as well.

Alright. I’m going to give you three example recipes so you can cover an appetizer, a main course, and a dessert, but I’m going to keep things simple so you don’t have to put in too much work (because that’s not what pot is about).

1.) Let’s start with a salad. A good salad is healthy and classy, and it breaks that brownie-only paradigm most people have when it comes to infused edibles. And in this case, we’re going to infuse the dressing—doing so makes it easy to control your serving size, and all you’d have to do for those designated drivers is offer some regular dressing to keep them sober. So, get yourself some good romaine lettuce, croutons, and anchovy filets for a garnish, and then combine all these ingredients for the dressing:

  • ½ TSP anchovy paste
  • 1 TBS lemon juice
  • 1 clove garlic, finely minced
  • ¼ cup parmesan cheese
  • ½ TSP Dijon mustard
  • ½ TSP Worcestershire
  • ½ cup mayonnaise
  • 1/8th TSP each, salt and pepper
  • 2, 10mg packets Ripple Pure 10.

This dressing recipe will make five servings, and if you do the math, after adding the 20mg THC, each serving will contain roughly 3mg THC given what will be left over in the dressing bowl. So, do you see what I’m doing? If you create three courses, each containing about 3mg THC, the entire dinner will give each guest the target 10mg of THC. Math is your friend when it comes to edibles. And my choice to use Ripple in the first course was intentional: Ripple is made with a water-soluble THC distillate (I wrote a whole blog on the subject that you can read HERE), which means it will kick in much sooner than something lipid-soluble. This means that your guests will start to feel the high right in the middle of your main course; that’s next-level hosting.

Now, onto the main course. Since I started with an infused topping, I’m going to stay in that lane and give you a recipe for a badass gravy. You can put it on steak or chicken or potatoes, and people who are trying to stay sober can simply go without gravy. But I’m just going to give you the ingredients (if you don’t know how to make gravy, you shouldn’t be hosting dinner parties):

  • 1 cup chicken stock
  • 1 beef bouillon cube
  • ½ TBS canna-butter
  • 3 ½ TBS unsalted butter
  • 1/8th cup flour
  • ½ TSP onion powder
  • 1/8th TSP thyme
  • ¼ TSP sage
  • ½ TSP rosemary
  • ¼ TSP each, salt and pepper

Please don’t let that “canna-butter” ingredient scare you because it’s relatively easy to make. I wrote an entire blog about the process that you can read HERE. If you follow my instructions, a ½ tablespoon will contain 20mg THC, and once again, if you split this gravy into five equal portions, each guest will get just over 3mg, thereby bringing our two-meal total to just over 6mg THC. But please remember, if you’re not up to making your own canna-butter, you can simply add two packets of Ripple to the gravy and achieve the same results.

Onto dessert! If you clicked that last “HERE” I gave you, you read directions on how to make infused oil. And if you make infused oil and then do a quick google search for oil-based brownie recipes, you can serve your guests pot brownies topped with ice cream for the final course. But I’m going to pretend that you’re a lazy stoner like I am, and since cooking two courses is tiring, we’re going to make dessert easy. Here are the ingredients:

  • Ice Cream
  • 4oz melting chocolate
  • 2 – Coda single-serving hot-chocolate on a spoon.

If you mix all the chocolate together, melt it, and then pour it over five servings of ice cream, that will give your guests another 3mg THC each, and then everyone will be sitting comfortably at about 10mg each after the dinner is over. And then if you throw in a couple grab-bags for your guests containing after-dinner joints and whatnot, it’ll be a dinner party worth putting on Pinterest (but I don’t know if you’re allowed to pin pot stuff).

Of course, cannabis dinner ideas are limited only by your imagination, and for inspiration, there are all sorts of sites like THIS one that’ll give you all the ideas you need to be Martha Stewart crossed with Snoop Dog in the kitchen. And we sell all the pot-related stuff you’ll need to complete these recipes right here in our Durango dispensary. So, if you’re thinking about throwing a cannabis dinner party, bring your valid I.D. proving that you’re 21 or over and come see us at 208 Parker Ave, because We’re Your Best Buds!