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Best Bud of the Month

Budtender, Dispensary, Dispensary deals, budtender

Libby Lunda
Retail Floor Manager

Libby used to sit by a stream in Wisconsin to smoke with her friends. They’d buy quarter ounces for fifty bucks, and the stuff was just as horrid as you’d imagine: brown brick-weed that had just as many seeds and stems as it did flower. They’d load their bowls and winnow out the seeds, and then toss them in the river, watching them float away to somewhere unseen. Libby would imagine her seeds riding the rapids and then landing to sprout on an island—it was a magical garden of sorts, a place where marijuana was legal and accepted. But that place didn’t exist in Wisconsin, so when Libby grew up and had a child of her own, she moved her family to Durango, because if you think about it, this is where her seeds have come to grow; this place is the island she imagined. And now, Libby Lunda is your Best Bud of the month.

Q.  When did you start working for The Greenery?
Libby.  “I just celebrated my two-year anniversary!”

Q.  What’s your favorite way to enjoy marijuana?
Libby.  “I love bongs, and Sour Diesel is the best strain of all time.”

Q.  What’s your favorite outdoor activity?
Libby.  “Gardening and growing. I love to stand back when it’s all done and look at the aftermath. The work is worth it when you see what you’ve created.”

Q.  Tell us about your pet.
Libby.  “King is an XL Bully, and he’s a little shit. He’s a puppy trapped in a beast’s body.”

Q.  Which station do you stream while you’re working at The Greenery?
Libby.  “Top hits, or anything modern.”
(For the record, as one of Libby’s coworkers, I can tell you that when the door is shut at the end of the day, she puts on old-school rap and turns it up. Don’t be fooled by that “top hits” nonsense; Libby is a straight-up gangster.)

Q.  What do you like most about working at The Greenery?
Libby.  “I love our customers. I love getting to know the regulars and helping the tourists who are just as excited about legal marijuana as I am.”

Libby is the sort of person who combats the budtender stereotype. She isn’t in this industry because she sees it as a novelty or because she’s some stoner who’s looking for an employee discount. She’s here because she knows this industry has a future, and she’s the type of young professional who plans on capitalizing on the unique opportunity that has sprouted downstream from Wisconsin. And she really does love her customers as much as she says. I’ve seen her perk up in the middle of a bad day just to dedicate all of her attention to someone who’s just looking for some relief. Libby is a compassionate budtender who cares genuinely for each and every one of The Greenery’s customers, and because of that, she is definitely your Best Bud of the month for August. Thank you Libby!

Budtender, dispensary, dispensary discounts, marijuana education

The Greenery Hits a Theme Song

The Greenery, dispensary deals, marijuana, pot shop

Darth Vader is cool only because he has theme music. Granted, the lightsaber helps a little bit, as does his freaky ability to choke fools from a distance, but if it wasn’t for the sonorous, tonal music that follows Vader wherever he goes, he’d be average at best. All the other aliens in that far, far away galaxy wouldn’t even notice when he walked in the room, despite his awkward breathing, and there’s no way he could pull off that goth cape without his theme song. It’s sad, but true.

That’s why I’ve always wanted theme music. Sometimes, when I’m especially high, my brain obliges. I’ll be walking from point “A” to point “B,” and something groovy will start playing in my head. My walk will morph into a strut, and I’ll start humming “Stayin’ Alive” by The Bee Gees. The world around me will slow down and start to sparkle, and I’ll bob my head to the rhythm. And if that were to ever happen in the real-world, I’d know that I’ve arrived, because anybody who’s anybody has theme music.

Think about it. When the President of the United States steps up to the podium, he’s accompanied by brazen fanfare—an entire orchestra announces his arrival with pomp and circumstance. When Stephan Colbert steps on stage, his audience knows it thanks to his Late Show theme song. Hell, a couple years ago at The Oscars, Tom Hanks got pissed-off because the band played the Forest Gump song when he walked on stage instead of the song from whatever movie he starred in that week; Tom Hanks is so famous he has multiple theme songs. That’s just crazy. But now, The Greenery is catching up to his level, because we have a theme song too—put that in your box of chocolates, Mr. Gump.

Dexter Davis is a student at Arkansas State, an artist who goes by ICEberg Slim, and he sent us his song a few weeks back. It’s called “The Greenery,” and really, it’s just a happy coincidence; the song has nothing in common with our dispensary save for its title, and Slim has never walked through our door. But theme songs don’t just fall from the sky every day, so for this blog, at least, we’re coopting Slim’s song as our own. And the song is alright. It sounds like the type of music Shaft would wake-and-bake to—warm and scratchy, vinyl straight from the turntable, it’s an old-school stoner jam.

Listen to it here, and then come in to tell us what you think. Feel free to walk through our door humming your own personal theme song, because your best buds won’t judge you. We know exactly what it’s like having a theme song, thanks to Dexter Davis, and just like Darth Vader, The Greenery has arrived.

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Dexter Davis, aka ICEberg Slim, at a recent performance.

#DispoLife

Budtender, Dispensary, Pot, Weed, Marijuana

There’s a large, sectional couch in our backroom. It’s black and upholstered with some sort of faux leather, and I love it. I come in an hour early twice a week to sit crisscross-applesauce right in the corner where the two sections meet; I put this laptop on my lap and I start clicking away on these shopworn keys just so you can read blogs just like this one. But today is different—today, I’m going to give you a peek behind the curtains.

I’m sitting on that couch right now, typing, comfortably in my spot. I’m in a large warehouse festooned with posters and artwork; there’s a shelving system encircling the room and three standing-desks against the walls. The air smells like you’d expect it to in a dispensary, verdant and calming, and there’s a swamp-cooler chill in the air. My earbuds are in and I’m listening to the type of embarrassing music that makes you appreciate headphones. I’m eight sentences into this post, and every ten minutes or so, Savanna walks by and opens an enormous bag of marijuana under my nose so I can smell this or that new strain. The last bag was full of Kosher Kush, and as I sniffed it while sitting on this couch, I realized that life couldn’t get much better: I realized that dispensary life is the life for me.

But I also realized that outsiders such as yourself might think that it’s always like this. You know, like maybe dispensary life is all about sitting on a couch and listening to music while a smiling girl like Savanna holds piles of pot under your face. I’m sure there’re people out there who think that we just play all day, balling up handfuls of marijuana so we can have a summertime snowball fight, laughing and frolicking in slow-motion like kids at a slumber-party while cannabis rains down amongst us. Well, it’s not like that (I swear). Everyone here is a professional who works hard for this company, and for this particular post, I figured I’d give you a virtual tour—a virtual “meet the team,” if you will—to dispel the dispensary myth that we’re all just lazy stoners. So, here we go…

Sloane’s desk is right behind me. She scours the world of cultivation to find for our customers the best pot in Colorado, and she does a damn good job. Because of her, we always have fourteen different strains available for our customers on our menu. In case you’re wondering, that’s five Sativa strains, five Indica strains, a high CBD strain, caviar (aka “moonrocks”), and two different strains in our one-gram, pre-rolled joints. Sloane orders all our flower and she makes sure our budtenders know everything about it, from THC potency to the strain’s lineage, and I promise it’s a fulltime job requiring serious dedication.

Savanna’s desk is against the wall across the way; she’s our assistant compliance manager. True, she makes me sniff pot sometimes, but she spends most of her time making sure our practices are up to snuff with this state’s demanding litany of recreational marijuana regulations; she handles the stress and demand with grace. Sam’s desk is right next to Savanna’s, and he does his damnedest to make sure our inventory is spot on; I’m not going to go into the vagaries associated with his position, but trust me, it’s important to be a mental ninja to do Sam’s job; our inventory is a liquid thing, ebbing and flowing in time with the insane amount of demand this industry experiences. So, Sam’s job is a high-maintenance endeavor requiring an attention to detail bordering on the obsessive.

Joel and Brian share one of the offices in the hallway; these two men are a duo of visionaries. They own this company and they have plans, you know, like Pinky and the Brain kind of plans wherein world domination is the goal. We’re expanding because of them, but I’ll write about that later. Further down the hall, there’s an office full of ladies. Karen lives in there (she’s our accountant who makes sure the numbers jive). Her desk is right next to Ashley’s, our house council, who’s ready at any time to defend this business with her mightier-than-the-sword pen. Faith has a desk in there too; she’s our marketing guru, and she sits behind her computer with that confident smile of hers while deftly selling our services to Durango.

Zach’s room comes next—it’s the pre-weigh room, and he spends his days weighing out accurately the pot you buy when you walk in our door. I’m sure that sounds like a simple task, but each nug-jug he fills must come within one-fiftieth of a gram to be good enough for our customers, and exacting requirements like that demand a laudable level of efficiency. Libby and Melissa share the office to your right as soon as you walk in, and chances are that one of them has asked for your identification. Melissa is our community relations manager and she orders all our edibles and concentrates; she’s been here since the beginning. Libby orders all our pipes and bongs and she’s our floor manager; our shop looks the way it does thanks to her hard work.

And that leaves the floor: you’ll usually find Clay or me behind the counter. Clay is a pot wizard who can tell you everything there is to know about the marijuana you’re buying because he helps us grow it, and I’m the new guy who writes for you and smiles incessantly because I finally broke into the marijuana industry. Lastly, Mike and Chris run our off-site grow. These two men form a modern-day Abbott and Costello comedic team, but when it comes to growing and harvesting marijuana, they’re serious master-growers who deliver crop after crop of Durango’s best marijuana.

And there you have it: it takes fifteen, full-time professionals to keep this dispensary running seven days per week. We take our tasks seriously with pride—I swear to you that The Greenery is the best dispensary in Durango—and we work as hard as we can to earn the title we go by: your Best Buds.

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High on life at The Greenery Grow!
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There is always a dog…or 5 in the back of The Greenery.
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Sam giving a wave and managing marijuana inventory in The Greenery warehouse.

Indica vs. Sativa

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There’re over four-thousand different strains of marijuana growing across the globe, sprouting like the wondrous weeds they are, but each of them falls into one of two categories: Indica or Sativa. Of course, most strains have been crossbred so many times that it’s difficult to tell which is which, and just about everything out there is a hybrid thanks to the incestuous way plants get together and make more plants—after decades of desultory pollination, there’s no longer a definite line in the sand between the two categories, and that can make things difficult when you’re chasing the effects that come from one side or the other.

But at The Greenery, we’re here to help. We know the lineage of each strain we sell and we’ve smoked all of them. We can tell you which bud will make you sleepy, which bud will perk you up, just like that Cheshire cat could tell Alice which side would make her bigger, which side would make her small. But before we get into specific strains, we should discuss the two, overarching categories so you have a jumping off place; we’ll start with Sativa.

You probably drew a Sativa leaf on your notebook back in high school. Yes, all pot leaves have the same number of fronds and they’re instantly recognizable thanks to the jagged edges, but Sativa leaves are a little different than their fatter Indica cousins. They’re light green and thin and they spread out perfectly to form the symbol we use for all marijuana. And the plant itself is special too. It can grow into a veritable tree, standing over two-stories high if you let it, but most varieties top-out at around ten feet.

Sativa is a day-time pot. The high is energetic and creative, and it’ll give you a bright haze that’s perfect for summer days, happy times. These cerebral strains live in your head and pollinate your thoughts with creativity, they make you giggle and go out, connect with what’s important. Sativa strains should remind you of tie-died T-shirts and road trips and the highlife we’ve been trying to recapture from the hippie days our parents reminisce about. And from a medical standpoint, these strains can battle back pain and headaches and depression, and for some, they can even act as an appetite suppressor, thereby destroying the “munchies” stereotype you see in cliché pot movies. However, I’d be lax if I didn’t tell you about Sativa’s darker side, so I’ll be honest about the possible negative side effects: with one puff too many, these strains are more likely to bring with them anxiety and paranoia. But you know what? Given that traditional pharmaceuticals and other recreational drugs (like booze) can kill you, I’d say a little anxiety is worth it (there’s no such thing as a pot writer who doesn’t toss in a caveat like that, so please forgive me).

Now, on to Indica—these varieties are famous for their dark green, broad leaves, and a musky scent. The plants themselves are short and squat, usually topping out at about six feet, and they’re originally from India and the Middle East (ergo, the name). Indica is a nighttime pot, perfect for good movies and comfortable blankets thanks to the body-high these strains bring with them. This strain should remind you of relaxed, fragrant evenings and smiling camels and that odd sitar music that makes sand dunes so exotic. Medicinally speaking, Indica strains can help with appetite stimulation and insomnia and anxiety relief. But one puff too many can put you down, and lethargy or insatiable munchies are the worst you can expect. It’s a cheesy one-liner, but all you need to remember is that “Indica will put you in-da-couch.” It’s the down to Sativa’s up, the mellow yin to Sativa’s energetic yang. And it’s wonderful.

Personally, before I started working in a dispensary, I used to think that Indica was the way to go, and that Sativa wasn’t for me. And now, I meet people who think the same way (or visa-versa) every day. They’ll come in and say something like “I hate Sativa because it makes me paranoid,” and they’ll ignore completely any of our Sativa-dominant hybrids. For the record, I don’t judge these people because my tastes used to run parallel to theirs. But now I’ve learned a few things, and I share them with as many customers as possible. At The Greenery, we always have at least ten, top-shelf strains available for purchase—five are Indica-dominant, and five are Sativa-dominant. You can see them here on our menu.

However, it’s the “dominant” in the description you need to pay attention to, because like I said, there’s really no such thing as a pure Indica or a pure Sativa anymore because just about everything out there has been mixed with everything else. But you know what? This is a good thing. Now, if you ask the right people (like us), you can find a perfect 50/50 hybrid that’ll give you both the head high that comes from Sativa and the body high that comes from Indica. If you come in and ask us, we can show you 70/30 strains that lean closer to the Sativa side of the spectrum—these can give you creativity and relaxation at the same time which can be sublimely mind-blowing. Or we can point you towards a 70/30 Indica-leaning strain that’ll bring with it deep body relaxation and a touch of the giggles. Isn’t that awesome?

Seriously, here at The Greenery, we can do that for you, and we won’t lead you astray as you bounce back and forth in the Indica vs. Sativa battle. Come in and tell us the specific high you’re looking for, and we’ll give you options. We’ll let you smell them and buy them at a fair price, and we’ll pay attention to your feedback. That’s how it should be, and that’s how it is with Your Best Buds.

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The Greenery menu description for an Indica-dominant strain.

Marijuana Sales Tax

Durango Marijuana

Easter Island is a dark place. It’s an atoll sheltered by isolation deep within the Pacific Ocean, and it’s hard to hear the lessons that island screams because it’s too far away—leagues of surf and time have quieted the prescient warning. Think about it: when you first read the words “Easter Island,” you pictured one of those gigantic stone heads and scoffed at the notion that something so comical could come from a “dark place,” so you probably don’t believe me; you probably don’t know that those gigantic stone heads are the only remnants of a once proud culture that committed suicide with greed.

As a side note, yes, this is a blog about marijuana taxation, and yes, I promise to get to that in a second, but first, we need to go back a little bit (just bear with me because I promise it’ll all make sense in the end). So, here we go…

The Moai

The Rapa Nui were fierce voyagers. They made their clothing from palm fronds, their skin was covered with black tattoos. They lived off the ocean and first made landfall on the shores of Easter Island around thirteen-hundred years ago. Back then, the island was a paradise. It was tall and safe, with sheltering cliffs that broke incoming storms—egg-laying birds had made a rookery out of those cliffs, and the flocks were thick enough to feed all the Rapa Nui. The high-rolling hills of Easter Island were forested with budding fruit trees, the valleys were verdant and rich with fresh water. And the island lizards were so majestic that rainbows shot out of their asses every morning at sunrise… That last sentence wasn’t one-hundred percent accurate, but you get the point: the Rapa Nui had found a home better than the sea, so there they stayed.

But then one day, some dude carved one of those gigantic stone heads. And then some other dude on the other side of the island saw the gigantic stone head and decided to carve his own. This one was a little bit bigger, a little bit better. The carving started to spread. Things started to change. The Rapa Nui started felling their forests faster than the fronds could grow. Wood was needed for scaffolding and for the moving of larger and larger stones, and barren patches started to appear on the rolling hills of Easter Island like a metastasized cancer. The rookeries were picked clean, and if the biologists are to be believed, an entire species of cliff-dwelling seabird was eaten into extinction because the Rapa Nui were too busy carving gigantic stone heads to farm. The meat ran out and the forests disappeared and those island people who once lived on the sea turned to the caves. They dug into the hills, and in the end when things were at their worst, the Rapa Nui embraced cannibalism. The last man died one-thousand years after the first man landed, and all they left behind was a barren island covered with eight-hundred and eighty-seven gigantic stone heads called “The Moai.”

Greed did that; greed did all of that. And it’s not like our species has evolved that much in the three-hundred years that’ve passed since the Rapa Nui started eating each other; that same brand of insular capitalization is alive and well in our culture today. When we stumble upon something good, we milk it and milk it until there’s not much left to bleed dry, and then we move on to the next craze, the next thing to consume and use up. Today, right here right now in Durango, Colorado, we’re milking recreational marijuana by taxing the hell out of it.

For the record, I’m not saying that if we overtax marijuana we’ll turn to cannibalism like the Rapa Nui because that would be far too hyperbolic even for someone who smokes as much as I do. But I am saying that if we’re not responsible—if we don’t battle back the greed that defines our species—we’ll ruin something wonderful just as it’s starting to grow. And in that vein, the amount of sales tax that’s applied to recreational marijuana in this town is ludicrous. I’ll give you an example to prove my point. The total sales tax someone in Durango pays when he or she buys alcohol is 7.9%; three percent goes to the city, two percent goes to the county, and the remainder goes to the state. But when someone buys recreational marijuana in this town, he or she pays 20% in sales tax; three percent goes to the city, two percent goes to the county, and an exorbitant fifteen percent goes to the state of Colorado (and to make it more confusing, fifteen percent of that fifteen percent also comes back to Durango).

Doesn’t that seem somewhat unfair? I mean seriously, wouldn’t you think that the root cause behind drunk-driving fatalities should be taxed more than the reason this town is seeing such a boom in tourism? And to make it worse, “they” are considering a five percent increase in marijuana-related sales taxes in this town, thereby charging more than three times the rate levied against alcohol sales. The bump would all go to our city. It sucks, but you can read about it here in The Durango Herald if you’d like (a couple of your Best Buds from The Greenery were even interviewed).

To switch gears, I will admit that from the outside looking in, it probably seems like local marijuana dispensaries are making money hand over fist, and it probably seems like a good idea to tax the hell out of legal weed so this town can prosper. But unfortunately, statements like these are rife with ignorance. You see, marijuana dispensaries are taxed twice: we have to pay an extortionate amount of tax when we buy our pot wholesale, and then believe it or not, we have to pay anywhere from sixty to seventy percent in federal income tax after we sell our marijuana to the community (yes, you heard that right, the federal government doesn’t see anything wrong with taxing an industry that they refuse to legalize). At the end of the day, our profit margins are just as thin as they are in traditional retail industries, and we simply cannot afford another tax increase, especially since we’re still recovering from the one that just went into effect on July first.

The reason for this is that we simply cannot lower the retail prices on our quality marijuana and stay in business; we’d have to keep our base price constant and hope with crossed fingers that people would be willing to pay higher prices for legal weed. But would they? If this new tax is accepted and implemented, and top-shelf pot starts selling for around sixty-three dollars an eighth in this town, do you think people will still buy it legally, or do you think they’ll go back to “their guy” who sells the same bag of pot for fifty bucks on the street? Do you see what I mean? We’re taking too much; we’re chopping down too many trees. I know this tax sounds just a little bit bigger, a little bit better, but it’s just too much. It’s just another gigantic stone head when we already have plenty of Moai. It’s more than this small island of Durango can support, and our industry needs your help. So please, call our city representatives and county commissioners and tell them that we’re already paying enough; you can find city council contact information via this link and county commissioners contact info via this link. Or use our letter to mail your concern, Letter to County, City on Marijuana Tax.  Or better yet, please attend the upcoming County Commissioner Meeting at 5:30pm on July 20th in the Board Room of the County Administration Building and the City Council meeting at 6:30pm on August 15th in the Smith Chambers at City Hall and fight against this initiative because in the end, such a tax could limit your options when it comes to purchasing legal marijuana.

Thank you,

-The Greenery

LEARN MORE FACTS & DATA ON MARIJUANA TAXATION here Marijuana Tax Facts

Best Bud of the Month

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Melissa Nichols
Vendor & Community Relations Manager

Some Navy Seals can hold their breath for seven minutes; they go through all sorts of ninja training to get to that point. But at The Greenery, we have a budtender who can hold her breath for seventy-two seconds; she discovered her talent while playing dead-man games in Mexico because you’re never too old to mess with foreign lifeguards.

Melissa Nichols is simply awesome. She’s an open book who loves what she does, and we love having her here, but being our Community Relations Manager wasn’t her first job; Mel used to be a professional naked person. She posed in the nude for a sculpting class two hours per day, three times a week, for six weeks (if you do the math, that’s thirty-six hours’ worth of nudity in front of strangers). And I’m sure that if you looked long and hard enough, you’d probably be able to find a miniature, sculpted, naked Melissa at a local garage sale (we hereby promise a $1 pre-roll joint to anyone who brings one in). But here’s the rest of her story.

Q.  When did you start working for The Greenery?
Melissa. “I was the first budtender on the payroll, and I was behind the counter when Wally (our first customer) gave us the twenty-dollar bill that’s hanging in the back office.”

Q.  What’s your favorite way to enjoy marijuana?
Melissa.  “I love water pipes, and Cheese is my all-time favorite strain.”

Q.  What’s your favorite outdoor activity?
Melissa.  “I love snowboarding and hiking, but what I love most is connecting with the outdoors. I love taking time to myself outside and just breathing, looking at the life and nature around me, the bugs and plants, because it helps me connect with what’s important.”

Q.  Tell us about your pet.
Melissa.  “Mr. Mac is a black cat, and Prince Hal is a cat colored like a cow. He’s a Holstein cat. And Tigger is our yellow lab. We got him too late to do anything about his name.”

Q.  Which station do you stream while you’re working at The Greenery?
Melissa.  “alt-J radio, or any of the Tiny Desk Concerts on NPR; they’re just awesome.”

Q.  What do you like most about working at The Greenery?
Melissa.  “People are happy when they come into our store, and I get to make them happier. And I don’t have to censor myself when I’m working here, so I absolutely love it.”

And that’s Melissa. She’s the type of person who’s more comfortable barefoot—I’ve seen her afterhours, walking around in her colorful socks, making small foot-fists on the foamy pads behind our sales counter, and that says a lot about a person. She isn’t afraid to be who she is, and even though you might not believe it, she really is just as nice as she comes across when she asks for your ID. Melissa is a genuine and open person, and she’s worked diligently over the past two and a half years to make The Greenery Durango’s best dispensary. And that, my friends, is why Melissa Nichols is you Best Bud of the Month.

Cheers!  The Greenery, Budtender, Durango

Marijuana Terpenes

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My mom used to throw uppity wine parties when I was a child. She’d sit around with her friends and they’d spend more time sniffing their wine than drinking it, swirling it around in their oversized tasting glasses while they wore on their faces the serious expression of a wannabe connoisseur. They’d stick out their pinky fingers and raise their glasses, and then spout all sorts of pompous nonsense like “oh my, this one has a delightful tobacco finish,” or, “the nose on this one is reminiscent of figs on a warm summer’s day.” I’d stand against the wall shaking my head, doing everything I could to stop myself from shouting “it’s just alcoholic grape juice, you idiots!”

But then I got older and realized that there really is a marked difference between the white zinfandel sold in gas station coolers and the stuff sold in boutiques with labels inked entirely in French. Now I can appreciate the tannins and sulfites, or the lack thereof, and I don’t mind paying extra for the good stuff because that’s what life is about. And there’re plenty of parallels to be drawn between wine tasting and pot smoking because the taste matters—as it turns out, if you pay attention to the smell and flavor of your favorite flower, you can figure out exactly which type of high you can expect.

Distilled down to its essence, marijuana is a substance that we smoke to feel good and it’s possible to be too supercilious, saying all sorts of weird words like decarboxylation or cannabinoids just to sound smart, and I promise I won’t do that right now; the information I’m about to share with you is real, and we’re just now starting to understand it. Eventually, marijuana will be marketed by the specific effects each strain provides after the scientists figure it out definitively, but for now, a good deal of this is iffy around the edges. So, it goes without saying that the effects and smells listed below are subjective. Here we go…

“Terpenes” are hydrocarbons. They’re found in almost all green, leafy plants, and they serve as natural protection against mold and bugs and whatever else plants are afraid of. They’re the fancy little chemicals that make pot smell and taste the way it does, and they work in concert with other cannabinoids like THC and CBD to make you feel good when you smoke marijuana—the THC gets you high, but the terpenes effect how that high feels. Know what I mean? If THC is He-Man, a muscle-bound do-gooder who always saves the day, then the terpenes are Battle Cat, an unsung hero who helps the hero do what he needs to do. And each terpene does something different, something you can intentionally look for in your pot by taste and smell. Again, what follows is subjective, so you’ll need to fiddle around with this a little on your own to get the most out of this:

  1. Pinene. This one is easy to remember because it smells like a pine tree, just like the name suggests. It might help with asthma relief or memory problems or inflammation.
  2. B-Caryophyllene. This is a hard one to pronounce (and my spell-check hates it), but it smells like cloves or pepper, and it might help with digestive problems like ulcers or an upset stomach.
  3. d-Limonene. This is another easy one because it smells like lemons, and it might help with immune system problems.
  4. Terpinolene. This one will smell like flowers, and it’s an antioxidant with antibacterial effects and mood enhancement possibilities.
  5. Linalool. This one will smell sweet and fruity, and it might help you with pain or anxiety of depression.
  6. B-Ocimene. This one will smell like a woody orchard (I promise that’s as poetic as I’ll get) and research suggests it might be antifungal/antiviral.
  7. B-Myrcene. This is the dank stuff, the musky perfection that permeates my favorite Indica strains, and it might bring with it relaxation and pain relief and respite from insomnia.

And there you have it; I’m sure you’ve already figured out how this list might help you: if you’re having stomach problems that you’d like to try to treat with marijuana, come into our store and walk up to the counter. Grab one of our sample jars and unscrew the lid, and smell one of our strains—look for something that smells like cloves or pepper and see if the B-Caryophyllene terpene does something for your belly. Or, if you’re in a bad mood, sniff around our samples looking for something that smells like flowers to cheer you up, buttercup. And so on and so forth. Let you nose be your guide, just like Toucan Sam used to tell us in his Fruit Loop commercials, and see where it leads you—it might bring you the relief you’ve been looking for. At the end of the day, that’s what matters, and that’s why we’ve decided to put this out there for you, because we’re your Best Buds.

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Medicinal Marijuana

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The Greenery is a recreational-only marijuana dispensary. However, we offer a twenty-percent discount to medical patients (so long as you can show us a valid Colorado MMJ card), and we do so for good reason: for many people, marijuana really is effective.

Frankly, most people buy pot to get high, and there’s nothing wrong with that. When they walk through our doors, they’re looking for THC (Tetrahydrocannabinol), plain and simple, because it’s the psychoactive compound in pot that can turn any frown upside-down. However, THC is just one of the cannabinoids found in flower—there’re least one-hundred and thirteen of them of them in marijuana—and as the THC percentage increases, the amount of the others decreases. The proverbial “they” still don’t know what most of the other cannabinoids do, but I’m sure it’s only good things, and if you shop only for a high THC percentage, you might be missing out on a few other benefits. Specifically, the higher the THC level climbs, the lower the CBD (Cannabidiol) and CBN (Cannabinol) levels fall. If you’re a medical marijuana patient, or if you’ve always wanted to try pot to see if it helps you, this is something you need to know.

CBD isn’t psychoactive (it won’t get you high), so most people don’t pay too much attention to it. However, the stuff is wonderful. It’s been called the compound that gives you “relaxation without intoxication,” and it brings with it a whole smattering of additional properties. I’ve read studies that show CBD may combat everything from PTSD to epileptic seizures, and from personal experience, I attest to CBD’s ability to fight my insomnia. Here at The Greenery, we always have a high CBD strain on the shelves, and our friendly budtenders can show you a wide variety of CBD-infused edibles or topicals if you’d rather not smoke flower to try CBD.

CBN won’t get you high either, but it looks to be just as promising as CBD. According to Steep Hill, “The consumption of 2.5mg to 5mg of CBN has the same level of sedation as a mild pharmaceutical sedative, with a relaxed body sensation similar to 5mg to 10mg of diazepam.” Isn’t that crazy? CBN is a non-psychoactive plant derivative with no known side effects, and it’s twice as effective as a nasty, old-school pharmaceutical. Secondly, you can buy CBN tablets from The Greenery for a fraction of the price you’d pay for an artificial chemical at the pharmacy. CBN has been shown to do all sorts of things, and if you’re looking for some alternative options, this compound is a great place to start.

Look, I know it’s possible that I just created for you more questions than I answered, and the breadth of alternative cannabis is far too wide to address a laconic post like this one. There’re plenty of online resources out there you can use to answer CBD and CBN related questions, but The Greenery is right here in Durango, and personally, I like talking to people instead of Google. So, come in and see your best buds. Ask us your questions about CBD and CBN, and we’ll show you all the available options, because that’s why we’re here. And as always, please remember that we cannot provide medical advice and recommend you consult with your healthcare provider before introducing any marijuana products into your regimen.

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THC Percentage

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Some days, life’s stressors need a little numbing, and something strong is called for, like a kickass Sativa that’ll fill your lungs and banish the bullshit. And for occasions like that, The Greenery sells Chemmy Jones. This stuff is ridiculous. We don’t always have it on our shelves because the demand is so high, but the THC level comes in at a world-record forty-percent, the flower smells like a science experiment, and the high hits you like a back-handed pimp slap. It isn’t a complex high, but it’s energetic and strong and perfect for the days when the tedium doesn’t seem to stop. But what about the other days? What about the days when you’re just looking to relax a little bit, and what about the days when you’d like to be high and functional at the same time?

Every marijuana writer in the history of marijuana writers has made a comparison between pot and alcohol because it’s such an easy analogy, and I’m about to do the same thing even though it borders on a cliché, so bear with me… Chemmy Jones is like 151 Rum—a spirit so strong it requires a metal flame suppressor on every bottle so they don’t explode spontaneously around candles. And sometimes, 151 is exactly what you need (especially if you’re in the mood to light your face on fire and become a YouTube sensation). But 151 won’t always work because your friends will start to worry if they catch you drinking it on a Tuesday. So, especially for week-days when others are watching, most people prefer beer or wine; beverages that’re enjoyable thanks to their lower alcohol content and flavor profiles. Likewise, there’s a pot for that: Flo.

Flo, Recreational Marijuana, High THC,
Flo is a strain that’s usually on our menu because we grow it (if you come into our shop and look to your right, you’ll see a large-screen TV showing a live-feed of our grow if you don’t believe me). And our guys know what they’re doing: Flo is flavorful and understated with a comfortable, happy high that’s perfect for summer days. If Chemmy Jones is 151 on a blurry Saturday night, then Flo is a cold Mexican Logger after work. For the record, Flo still packs a punch and it’ll get the job done after an especially trying Monday, but with a THC percentage hovering between eighteen and twenty-four percent, you’ll still be able to form coherent sentences after smoking it. Doesn’t that sound nice? Flo usually sells out quickly as well, but if you call or come in, one of our friendly budtenders can point you towards something comparable.

At The Greenery, we have a wide variety of strains that offer an equally wide variety of effects. We have deep Indica strains that’ll put you in the couch, we have strong Sativa strains that’ll leave your brain buzzing, and we have everything in-between. But I want you to know that if you always shop for a high THC percentage, you might be missing out on a few truly spectacular strains like Flo. Yes, I know the choices can seem overwhelming, and sometimes, it’s easiest just to buy the pot with the most THC, but I’d invite you to check out our menu before deciding. Each strain will have a little “+” symbol next to the name, and if you click on it, it’ll give you a complete description of the strain and of the high you can expect from smoking it, and it’ll display the associated THC percentage. But please, if you’d rather talk to a human, we’re always here. Just shoot us a comment via our “contact us” page, call us at (970) 403-3710, or visit us at 208 Parker Ave. We’ll do our best to answer any strain-specific questions you might have, and we’ll get you what you need, be it something over the top that’ll erase a bad day, or something mild that’s easy to enjoy with your Best Buds.

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Best Bud of the Month

Sam Redman

Inventory/Metrc (Marijuana Enforcement Tracking Reporting Compliance)/POS Manager

Sam Redman is The Greenery’s very own Renaissance man. He’s an intellectual—one who can wear a denim jacket and pull it off—and he’s done all the things the rest of us just want to do: he camped in the backwoods of France for five months on end; he traveled the world just to see what he could see; he’s the front-man of a badass funk and hip-hop fusion band, Diabolical Sound Platoon. And he’s a great guy to work with. He usually stays in the back, crunching numbers at his standing desk while a podcast plays in the background, but he runs to the register when the rush hits, and he serves our customers with an affable smile, an easy laugh. Sam helped build The Greenery, lending to our company culture his eloquence and attention to detail—he’s a cornerstone in our team, an all-around cool guy, and he’s your Best Bud of the month.

Q. When did you start working for The Greenery?
Sam.  “A month before we opened.”

According to a fellow budtender, “Sam is kind of a big deal,” because he’s been here from day-one. He strapped on a tool belt and put in the floor our customers walk on daily, and he’s been managing our ever-changing, quicksilver inventory ever since.

Q.  What’s your favorite way to enjoy marijuana?
Sam.  “I don’t have one. I like all of it, from dabbing to vaporizing to smoking flower.”

Q.  What’s your favorite outdoor activity?
Sam.  “Bouldering. It’s a concentrated, gymnastic way up the rock, with pads and chalk, but no ropes. It’s climbing rendered down to its essence. I love solving bouldering problems, and I’ve authored a few local first-ascents, like ‘Al Montana.’”

Q.  Tell us about your pet.
Sam.  “Logan is a manly Maine Coon, but he isn’t named after Wolverine. He’s nineteen years old, and he got his name before Hugh Jackman was cool.”

It was early morning a few years ago, and Sam was sleeping when he heard his roommates screaming that “Logan had caught a bird.” Sam ran buck-naked into the living room to find Logan battling a bona fide turkey vulture with one of those wingspans you usually see only on The Discovery Channel. So Sam jumped into the fray and grabbed the monstrous bird while his roommates pointed and laughed, despite the fact that naked bird wrestling is a serious situation. Sam ran to the window with his prize and knocked out the bug screen while his foe fought with talons and screeching bird noises. Sam released the vulture into the air (no doubt in slow-motion, looking like a rugged falconer), and it took flight immediately without looking back. Logan was pissed for weeks, never truly forgiving Sam for his intervention, but that’s just the way cats are.

Q.  Which station do you stream while you’re working at The Greenery?
Sam.  “I like cold-wave and podcasts. Lately, I’ve been listening to a lot of Neil DeGrasse Tyson.”

Q.  What do you like most about working at The Greenery?
Sam.  “I love our customers, and the challenging aspect of controlling our extensive inventory.”

And there you have it. Frankly, this company is what it is in a large part thanks to Sam’s contributions. He’s a witty guy with a cunning repertoire of pickup lines, and he’s a knowledgeable budtender. The next time you come in, look for the guy in a jeans-jacket and say “hi.” Strike up a conversation about flat-earthers and tell Sam they might be on to something. He loves that kind of stuff…

Sam Redman, Budtender, The Greenery, Durango, CO, marijuanaSam solving some marijuana mutha-fucking mysteries at his post.