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September’s Best Bud of the Month

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Cameron Mask
Budtender, Paraphernalia Purchaser, Insanely Fast Joint Roller

About your Best Bud:

Cameron’s birthday is on the 29th of this month, but that’s not the reason we’re featuring him this week—Cameron is a young professional and Army vet who’s truly passionate about this industry. He’s two years away from earning his business degree, and as soon as he has it, Cameron has aspirations of opening his own concentrate production company (he plans to call it “Tree House Club Concentrates,” and the hidden THC acronym is awesome). But for now, Cameron is cutting his teeth as a Budtender and the guy who orders all our non-marijuana products. He’s soaking up knowledge and learning the ins and outs of legal marijuana with the best team in Durango. And since he’s part of the reason we’re the best, we figured you should meet him this week:

Q. When did you start working for The Greenery?
Cameron. “March sixth of this year.”

Q. What’s your favorite way to enjoy marijuana?
Cameron. “Dabbing. I really enjoy dabbing, and I love the taste of Live Resin.”

Q. What’s your favorite outdoor activity?
Cameron. “Running.”

Q. Tell us about your pet.
Cameron. “I have two. I have a Border Collie named Panda, and a Blue Nose named Kya.”

Q. Which station do you stream while you’re working at The Greenery?
Cameron. “I let other people pick. I’m flexible, as long as it sounds good.”

Q. What do you like most about working at The Greenery?
Cameron. “I love the professionalism, and the education we impart to our customers. But as to the industry, I love educating tourists so they can go back home and push for marijuana legalization in places that don’t yet have it.”

Cameron really is an expert connoisseur when it comes to concentrates. He makes them in his home, he smokes them, and he knows more about them than just about anyone who works at The Greenery; he’s our resident aficionado. We all like working with him behind the counter because there’s no such thing as a question about hash Cameron cannot answer, and there’s no such thing as a customer who deals with Cameron and leaves our store without a smile and a little more knowledge about this industry, just like he said in his last response.

So, this week, we’d like to thank Cameron for his service, for his dedication and passion, and for being a part of our team. Congratulations, Cameron, you’re September’s Best Bud of the Month!

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Dispensary FAQs

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As a budtender, I’ve heard them all: Is marijuana instantly addictive? Will this stuff make me see flying animals? Would you please mail some of that marijuana sex spray to me here in South Africa? For real, I’ve answered all these questions, and I tried my best to do so with a straight face. And somewhere along the line, it made me realize that I’m a professional question answerer—all day every day, I field questions from people who are trying to learn about this industry, so this week, I figured I’d answer a few of the most commonly asked questions preemptively. Here we go…

1.) What’s the difference between Indica and Sativa?

Well, I wrote an entire blog about it that you can read HERE, but basically, the Indica strains are famous for relaxation, and the Sativa strains are known for stimulation. The indicas evolved in India (thus the name), and the plants are short and bushy, as where the sativas (that originated in Africa) are tall with thin fronds. Just remember “indica, in-da-couch,” and “viva Sativa!”

2.) What’s your most potent edible?

On the recreational side of things in Colorado, edibles are capped at 100mg THC per package, and 10mg THC per serving, so they’re all equally potent. However, we do sell a few edibles that come in 5mg servings for people with a lower tolerance.

3.) How much am I allowed to buy?

Each adult can buy one ounce of flower, or 800mg worth of edibles, or 8g of concentrates. And yes, there is an equivalency chart to follow. Basically, you’re allowed to purchase eight eighths, and one eighth is equal to one gram of concentrate or a 100mg edible. So, hypothetically, you could buy four eighths, two grams of concentrate, and two 100mg edibles, and that would be your maximum.

4.) Do you sell any CBD-only products?

Nope. Those are available online, but they’re derived from hemp, and everything we sell is derived from cannabis (they’re completely different animals). However, we do sell a few products that are “mostly” CBD, such as our Lucky Turtle Tincture that contains 500mg CBD and only 10mg THC: each serving will give you roughly 14mg CBD and 0.25mg THC, which isn’t enough to get you “high.” Just so you know, the proverbial “they” have figured out that CBD can be more effective if it’s accompanied by a little THC thanks to the “entourage effect,” and I wrote an entire blog you can read HERE if you’d like to learn more.

5.) Do you have anything on sale?

Almost always! We have rotating deals throughout the week (for instance, I’m writing this on a Wednesday, and today, all our concentrates are 15% off). For a complete list of our daily deals, click HERE.

6.) I’m from out-of-state and I don’t have a medical card; can I still buy from you?

Yes. We’re a recreational-only dispensary (but we offer a 20% discount to customers who have a valid Colorado-issued medical card), and all you need to show us when you shop here is a valid, government-issued I.D. with a picture proving that you’re twenty-one or over.

7.) What’s the difference between a smokable and an edible high?

The stuff you smoke hits you almost instantly as where an edible can take up to two hours to hit you completely. The biggest mistake people make is eating more after twenty minutes or so because they aren’t feeling anything, and then boom, it all hits you. Please go slow and don’t do this: once you eat it, you cannot un-eat it, and an over-the-top edible experience is something you want to avoid. Trust me… Lastly, a smokable high lasts about an hour and a half, but an edible high can last for up to six hours, which is why caution is so important.

8.) Where can I smoke?

This is the tricky one. To consume any sort of marijuana, you must be on private property with the property owner’s permission. That’s what makes things tricky for tourists. However, plenty of the local hotels allow you to consume cannabis in designated areas—all you need to do is ask, and I promise they hear the question multiple times a day. And yes, I wrote an entire blog about this too, and you can read it HERE.

9.) Where are you located and what are your hours?

We’re at 208 Parker Avenue in Bodo Park right behind the GMC dealership. Simply call us if you need directions. We’re open from 9am to 9:30pm on weekdays, we’re open from 10am to 9:30pm on Saturdays, and from 10am to 7pm on Sundays. We’re closed on Christmas and New Year’s Day, and we have shortened hours on a few other holidays, but you can click HERE for a map and all sorts of other info.

10.) Is marijuana instantly addictive, will it make me see flying animals, and can you mail it to me here in Africa?


That’s it! Of course, if I didn’t answer one of your questions, there’s nothing wrong with calling us to ask: (970) 403-3710. And there’s definitely nothing wrong with coming into our Durango dispensary to ask us in person because we’re all professional question-answerers, and We’re Your Best Buds!

710 in Durango

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7/10 is a lesser-known stoner’s holiday than 4/20, much in the same way St. Patrick’s Day takes a backseat to Octoberfest for people who prefer to celebrate beer. Hell, I won’t name names, but there were at least two budtenders with whom I spoke before writing this who had no idea that 7/10 was a holiday at all. However, you can’t really blame them:

The origin story behind April twentieth’s inauguration as a marijuana holiday is well-known (read about it HERE), but thus far, nobody is taking credit for 7/10 even though everyone agrees on why it’s a holiday (7/10 upside-down spells “OIL,” and hash oil is awesome). But maybe nobody came up with it first. I remember my father-in-law telling a joke thirty years ago about a blonde going into a gas station and asking for a “710 cap” because she was reading it upside-down, and that dumb-ass joke is older than the BHO that gave birth to the stoner version of 7/10.

But when you think about it, none of that really matters. The first documented use of the term “710” as it applies to cannabis oil was back in 2010 (and yes, it was in the Urban Dictionary), the term has been used ever since to talk about hash oil discreetly, and now, many oil smokers light up at 7:10 (hopefully PM) and on 7/10. Boom. Origin story covered.

So, this year, we tossed around the idea of doing a campy 7/10 promotion here at The Greenery, but we decided against it because we could do better (of course, if you come in on 7/10, you’ll receive 15% off edibles, but only because 7/10 is on a Tuesday, and all Tuesdays are like that). This year, we wanted to do something permanent, so we decided to celebrate 7/10 by adding a new oil cartridge to our shelves for all you oil lovers: the 500mg V3 CO2 Oil Cartridge.

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The hardware is glass and metal and ceramic, the CO2 oil is pure and potent, and the price is ridiculous. We’re selling these carts for half of what a few other versions cost, because that’s how you do 7/10.


And we’ve gone further. Most of us here at The Greenery are fans of flower because our grow is one of the best in the state, and we celebrate 4/20 the way Prince recommended back in 1999. But that doesn’t mean we haven’t been listening to the oil-smoking half of the community, and your requests for a deeper lineup of well-priced dabs have been heard.

We’ve lowered the price of our Shatter, Wax, Live Resin, Rosin, and HCFSE by 20% (seriously, you’re welcome), we’ve added multiple Evo Labs products to our shelves right alongside the V3 cart, and this 7/10, we’ll be selling Pax Pods filled with budder, live resin, and distillate that you probably won’t find elsewhere.

You see, The Greenery is an anomaly.

We’re this cozy, locally-owned Durango dispensary nestled deep within Bodo Park, but we have a big-city 7/10 selection (I shit you not, a man drove here from Denver just to buy his limit of HCFSE from Madrone because we were the only ones with shelves deep enough to have what he needed). So, if you’re in the camp that celebrates 7/10 and you’re twenty-one or older with a valid I.D., come see Your Best Buds at 208 Parker Ave, and we’ll get you set for this Tuesday. Happy 7/10, Durango!

Photos courtesy of our friends at Madrone & V3 Oil!

New Pricing at our Durango Dispensary

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In the beginning, we had no idea what they were going to throw at us when it came to taxes. Frankly, back in ’14, businesses such as ours were willing to accept even the most astronomical rates simply so we could get away with selling legal marijuana; it was a means to an end. And “they” knew we’d put up with anything, so the rates kept climbing and climbing, and our out-the-door prices jumped all over the place like a kangaroo on crack. Because of this, we made the decision early on to not include taxes in our advertised prices because we never knew what was going to happen from month to month.

But a few months ago, when they tried to raise taxes even higher, we threw a fit. Our house counsel lobbied lawmakers and we started a petition and we got together as an industry and marched on city hall with torches and pitchforks. They gave in and agreed to keep our combined tax rate at 20%, which is insane enough as it is.

Think about it: if a customer comes in and spends $500, which happens all the time, they end up paying an additional $100 in tax—when this happens, I like to tell the customer that they single-handedly paid to fix a pothole with the tax that came from their purchase. But that’s just the way it is, and at least things have leveled off. And the good news is that since marijuana sales tax has become static (albeit extortionate), we’ve decided to include tax in our advertised prices, and since we had to change things anyway, we decided to make a few other adjustments, and I wanted to use this week’s blog to tell you about them. So, from now on, we’re going to have four tiers of flower pricing that represent your ‘out the door’ cost:

Craft: This is the crazy-good stuff, the flower you’d think of as true top-shelf marijuana. There will be times when our Craft flower comes from other small-batch growers, but for the most part, we grow all our Craft cannabis. We baby these plants; we play music for them and water them by hand and give them the love and time they need to grow the best buds on earth. From now on, with tax included, our Craft strains will sell for $24 a gram (of course, there are always price breaks for quantity).

Premium: These strains will usually come from featured growers around the state who are renowned for cultivating the most terpene-rich, potent strains in Colorado. You’ll need to check our marijuana menu from time to time to see what’s available, but these strains will sell for $18 per gram.

Choice: I’d hate to call our Choice strains “mid-range” because they’re still better than most of the other stuff in town, and you shouldn’t feel as if any quality is sacrificed per our Choice strains. These buds are still grown by some of the best cultivators in the state, and the potency is still in that Colorado range that put us on the map. Our Choice flower will cost you $12 per gram.

Select: This flower is still quality, but it might come in popcorn form (little buds) or have a lower THC percentage. This is the stuff you’ll want to buy if you decide to roll a comically-large joint or if your house is full of guests with vacuum lungs (you know who I’m talking about). And our decision to offer Durango a Select strain is something new for us, because now, you’ll be able to walk out the door with a $9 gram, which is awesome.

And we didn’t stop there. When we decided to restructure, we went all the way and adjusted our concentrate pricing for all you dabbers out there. From now on, you’ll be able to leave The Greenery with grams of concentrate for these tax-included prices (but of course, all the prices in this blog are subject to change because city hall might forget about the pitchforks):

Select Wax: $30 per gram

Premium Wax: $45 per gram

Shatter: $50 per gram

Live Resin: $60 per gram

Rosin: $60 per gram

HCFSE (Crystalline): $84 per gram

Isn’t that awesome?! All the premium concentrates we sell come from Madrone, which is the best producer of new-school hashes in the state. I’ll write more about them in a separate blog because they deserve it, but for now, please trust me when I say that there simply isn’t a better dab in Durango, and these prices are definitely worth it (if you’ve dabbed Madrone before, this isn’t something I need to tell you).

And that’s that! It’ll take us a week or so to bring in the Select Wax, but all these other changes will go into effect on Tuesday, June 19th. Our menus will be simpler, our prices will be easier to understand since tax will be included in everything (even for our edibles), but most importantly, you’ll save some money. So, if you’re over twenty-one and you have a valid I.D., come see Your Best Buds at 208 Parker Avenue for the best-priced, highest quality cannabis products in Durango!


Who smokes marijuana?

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The short answer: everybody. I’ve seen all types of people walk into our dispensary, and I’ve written about it before, but for some reason, the archetypical stoner stigma still exists. It’s frustrating. We’re not all lazy losers or burnt-out pot heads in much the same way that people who shop at the corner liquor store aren’t all comical drunks. But hey, marijuana has only been legal for a few years, so I get why the misconception lingers.

The last time I tried to make this point in writing, all I had to back me up was my opinion (which is far from gospel), but now, the Colorado Department of Public Health and Environment released THIS study, and it proves my point. Basically, they polled over ten thousand Coloradan adults and found that 14.6% of them used cannabis currently, and then they asked follow-up questions to find out exactly who these “stoners” were.

But first, here’s the demographical breakdown of the 10,169 people who were interviewed:

Male: 5,138
Female: 5,031

Age 18-25: 625
Age 26-34: 1,251
Age 35+: 8,187

White: 7,823
Black: 259
Hispanic: 270
Multiracial: 1,416
Other: 194

Alright… now here’s the good part: the part proving that people who smoke pot didn’t list “sitting on the couch” as their profession. Here’s what we “stoners” do for a living:

Accommodation and Food Services: 30.1%

Administration, Support, Waste Management, and Remediation Services: 18.8%

Agriculture, Forestry, Fishing/Hunting: 14.4%

Arts, Entertainment, and Recreation: 28.3%

Construction: 19.7%

Education: 5.8%

Finance and Insurance: 13.5%

Health Care and Social Assistance: 7.4%

Information: 18.2%

Management of Companies and Enterprises: 13.1%

Manufacturing: 16.3%

Mining, Oil and Gas: 5.2%

Other: 20.9%

Professional, Scientific, Technical Services: 14%

Public Administration: 5.8%

Real Estate, Rent, Lease: 19.6%

Retail Trade: 18.9%

Transport and Warehousing: 10.2%

Utilities: 5.8%

Wholesale Trade: 11.4%

See?! We “stoners” are actually doctors and teachers, bosses and entrepreneurs, scientists and blue-collar workers, and we don’t deserve the stigma that we’ve earned thanks to close to a century of misinformation. And who knows what those “other” people from the list do for a living? They could be politicians or even closeted preachers who prefer natural drugs to the pharmaceutical kind, and it’s time that we forget the nonsense that pops into our heads when we hear the “stoner” label.

So, if you’ve been sheepish about trying cannabis, step out of the shadows and come see Your Best Buds at the finest Durango dispensary for dispelling stigmas: The Greenery at 208 Parker Avenue. We’ll help you find the best product for your needs, and together, we’ll help bring safe and legal cannabis into the mainstream where it belongs!

The Closest Durango Dispensary to Farmington

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I lived in Farmington for seven years and I know about all the wonderful things you guys have hidden down there. I know about all the hole-in-the-wall meat markets that sell authentic Mexican ingredients. I know about all the spectacular trails that crisscross the desert like sandy latticework throughout Chokecherry Canyon. I know about your sweltering summer days and your mild winter nights and your hard-working blue-collar culture, but unfortunately, I also know that for you, recreational marijuana is illegal.

Here in Durango, Colorado, we can smoke pot all we want because we’re just a little bit closer to the freedom we sing about before football games. And someday, New Mexico will be there too. You’ll have dispensaries and sensible laws, and if we wanted to, Durango and Farmington could pass blunts back and forth across the border. But you’re not there yet, so for now, you need to visit Colorado to purchase marijuana legally.

The Durango Greenery is the closest dispensary to Farmington, or any of northwest New Mexico for that matter, and we appreciate our customers from the south. Your business matters. We’ll give you the same loyalty card we give locals and we’ll treat you as if you were our next-door neighbor, because if you think about it, the hour-long drive that separates us doesn’t mean much—we’re just human beings who share a river and a fondness for marijuana.

So, come see us. We’re located at 208 Parker Avenue in Durango, Colorado, just north of the border, and if you need directions, simply call us at (970) 403-3710. We’ll tell you to head north on Highway 550 and once you cross the Animas River, take a right onto E Turner Dr. passing by the movie theater, then take a right to wrap under 550 and onto the Frontage Rd.  Make a left on Turner at Morehart Murphy Chevrolet. Next, take a left on Parker Ave, and then drive to the cul-de-sac at the end. There’s no way you’ll be able to miss our signs and flagging, and we have plenty of discrete parking. We’re open nightly until nine-thirty (except on Sundays when we close at seven), and we’ll be waiting right here for our friends from the south, because We’re Your Best Buds too.

*Please remember that under current law, it is illegal to leave Colorado with any marijuana products.* So stay awhile!

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February’s Best Bud of the Month

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Clay Siekman, aka ‘The Pot Whisperer’
Cultivation Plant Manager

About your Best Bud:

Clay is a pot whisperer. He hasn’t worked behind the counter for a while because he took over at our grow, but back in the day, people simply didn’t know how lucky they were when they bought pot from Clay. They’d come in, look at the ten strains on our menu for a minute, and then they’d say something like:

“Which one would you recommend?”

“Um, what type of high are you looking for?” Clay would ask. He’d always hold his chin between his thumb and forefinger like a detective, the other hand on his hip.

“What do you mean?”

“Well,” Clay would say, usually with a gesticulation or two, “are you looking for something relaxing? Something energetic?”

And this is where customers would mess up; they simply didn’t know they were talking to a pot whisperer who could tell them exactly what type of high came from each strain. Seriously, you should read this guy’s strain reviews—they’re precise and profound, almost like they were written by a sage who divined the essence of each strain with a spell of some sort.

If those customers would’ve realized who they were dealing with, they could’ve said something like, “I’d like a strain that goes well with old action movies on a Tuesday night,” or, “the left side of my head hurts and I want the perfect pot to pair with tacos.” And then Clay could’ve instantly suggested the most fitting strain available.

He really does know pot that well, but now, you should get to know him:

Q. When did you start working for The Greenery?
Clay. “October of 2016.”

Q. What’s your favorite way to enjoy marijuana?
Clay. “I love bongs. And my favorite strain is Green Crack, which is wonderful because we’re growing it right now, and we should have it ready to sell in our dispensary in a few months. But if I had to pick an edible, it’d be the Coda coffee and donuts that we sell at the shop.”

Q. What’s your favorite outdoor activity?
Clay. “Skiing, hiking, camping.”

Q. Tell us about your pet.
Clay. “I have a thirteen-years-old pug named Buddy. All he does is sleep and eat all day; he’s fat and old.”

Q. Which station do you stream while you’re working at The Greenery?
Clay. “Hip-hop jams!”

Q. What do you like most about working at The Greenery?
Clay. “I love the community that’s been built up around this industry. It’s great. I love being around likeminded people, both behind the counter and in front of it. Everyone who’s involved in this industry is incredible, and I love being a part of it.”

Frankly, this industry should love that Clay is a part of it, not the other way around, because the guy is a blessing. It took him about a year and a half to climb through our ranks, morphing from the shy kid behind the counter into the confident man running every aspect of our cultivation facility, and we’re just lucky he’s part of our brand.

And it’s not like a few of the regulars didn’t figure out that Clay was a pot whisperer, because after he left for greener pastures, people would come in and ask for him by name—they wondered where that “nice kid who gives good advice” went, and many of them missed the expert guidance he gave. Of course, his shoes were filled by other budtenders who are equally passionate about pot, and of course, we’d rather have Clay right where he is, whispering to our plants as they grow under his expert care. And that’s why Clay Siekman is Your Best Bud for February. Congratulations, Clay!


Kief Brick

Kief Brick, The Greenery Hash Factory, Durango, Colorado,

Thirty years ago, my father had a poster hanging on the inside of his closet door: it said, “a puff of kief in the morning makes a man as strong as a hundred camels in the courtyard.” The poster was warped and creased with age, the font was straight out of the sixties, and a tall hookah was pictured on the left with smoke wafting from the bowl at its crown. And as a child, I had no idea what it meant. I assumed it had something to do with drugs, because those are the things you “puff,” but I ruled that out quickly because my father didn’t do drugs; he loved his polo shirts and his hard-to-read books and his government job. However, the years passed, and I finally figured out that the poster was indeed a relic from my father’s hippy youth. But I still didn’t know what “kief” was.

Fast forward to my freshman year: a guy named Drew gave me a homemade kief box as a gift. As a side note, they call them “pollen boxes” now because kief is still illegal in most backwoods states, but that’s irrelevant. Anyway, when Drew gave me the box, I opened it and looked inside. There was a fine screen in the bottom with another compartment below it. I asked Drew what the hell a “kief box” was, and after giving me an incredulous look, he told me to keep my weed in the box and shake it gently from time to time—Drew told me that the “kief” would fall through the screen into the compartment below, and that I could take it out and smoke it.

So, I did exactly what Drew suggested. And after an eighth or three of that good west coast weed, I’d collected a decent dusting of kief in the bottom of my box. I took it out, sprinkled it on top of a bowl loaded in my bong, and I smoked it. I sat back in my dorm room and I waited for the strength of one-hundred camels; I waited for the superpowers promised by my father’s poster. They never came, of course, but at least I figured out the riddle to that poster (by the way, Google says it’s worth $1000 now), and at least I discovered kief.

Kief is an Arabic word meaning “pleasure” or “intoxication,” which, if you think about them, are two pretty damn synonymous words to start with, so it makes sense that the Arabs would use only the one word. But the kief I’m talking about is something you smoke: it’s a naturally-made marijuana concentrate formed from the dried trichomes found on cannabis flower. And frankly, kief is one of my all-time favorite ways to get high. But it’s always been difficult to find, just like all the good stuff in life, because most kief is homemade and so good that most people won’t share it. However, that’s an annoyance from the past because The Greenery Hash Factory has started manufacturing and selling old-school kief right here in Durango, Colorado.

We make it simply and naturally—we put premium, boutique flower in our dry-sift machine (using a 150-micron filter), and we let friction do the work. The flower tumbles around for a while and all the wonderful kief falls into a collection bin below (it’s like that little wooden kief box of mine, but on steroids). We take out the powdery kief and compress it into a brick with a pneumatic jack, and then we cut it up into grams of “kief brick” that we sell for $30 before tax at our local dispensary. The batch I smoked just before writing this (yeah, that’s right) was made from Indiana Bubblegum flower, and the numbers are incredible: the THC came in at 44.9%, and the CBG came in at 3.1%. At this point, especially if you’re a regular reader of marijuana blogs, you’re probably bored to tears when it comes to information on cannabinoids like THC and CBD because it’s ubiquitous, however, CBG is an up-and-coming cannabinoid you should pay attention to—this odd little chemical is actually the parent of both THC and CBD, it’s thought to have anti-inflammatory properties, and it might even be a neuro-protectant (smoking high-CBG concentrates might actually protect your brain, despite what your mother told you).

However, just like I said in last week’s post, the numbers don’t matter much, nor does the science—it’s the experience that counts: our kief is incredible, and I’m pretty sure this is the stuff Tinkerbell sprinkled on the Lost Boys to make them fly. And smoking kief is like eating the frosting first and leaving the cake behind, because you’re smoking the trichomes without the sticks and stems you’re used to. It’s flavorful and rich, and the smoke expands in your lungs, like a genie trying to get out of his claustrophobic lamp. The high is complex and long-lasting, with warm body notes and a cerebral giddiness that seems way too intense for something that costs only thirty bucks per gram.

But it’s the flavor that’s remarkable.

All the terpenes for which marijuana is famous are found in the trichomes—these terpenes are what give marijuana its smell and taste, and when you’re smoking pure trichomes, the flavor is multiplied exponentially. You can taste all the fruit and citrus and pine notes as if they were highlighted by a big marker, and all the subtle nuances that were hinted at before in plain flower stand out in kief like the stars they truly are. And this stuff smells exactly like it tastes: pungent, like intoxicating potpourri.

Actually, you just need to see it for yourself. You need to smell this stuff in person. You need to smoke it and sit back, and experience if it’ll make you feel stronger than one-hundred camels in the courtyard. So please, come in to The Greenery and ask one of our budtenders to show you our kief; this stuff is just as good as it sounds, and we’ll share it too, because that’s what Your Best Buds are for.

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Marijuana Edible Serving Size

marijuana edible dosage, edibles, marijuana, edible dosage, consuming edibles, highly edible, dixie elixirs, mountain high, incredibles, gummies, marijuana infused

“I ate way too many edibles this one time,” said every stoner, ever. For real. Everyone I know who enjoys the occasional edible has a similar horror story—one they look back on with an embarrassed shake of the head—because eating one milligram too many is an easy thing to do. So, as a stopgap, I’m going to share my story with you, and then I’ll tell you how to avoid the same mistake. Here it is:

I have my medical card, so I have to be especially careful—The Greenery is a recreational-only dispensary, so our edibles are limited to ten milligrams of THC per serving, but the medical shops around town don’t live under the same restrictions: I’ve seen them sell one-hundred-milligram brownies that’re small enough to eat in one bite, and that’s just scary, when you think about it (but I’ll get to that in a second).

Before I hired on here, I shopped at a medical place downtown. The sour gummies they sold were my favorite. Each gummy was ten milligrams, and two of them would put me exactly where I needed to be. But this one time (see?), the company that made my favorite sour gummies doubled their per-piece dosage. Nobody told me. And I’d just made it through an especially trying week, so I decided to have three gummies instead of two, because, you know… dumb. Anyway, as soon as the flavor faded from my mouth after gummy-number-three, something on the package caught my eye. I read on. And then the “oh shit” bubble appeared over my head as I realized I’d just eaten sixty milligrams instead of a hearty thirty. I got a glass of water and hunkered down with my afghan. Crazy things were coming…

I’m going to take a break here and tell you what you’re supposed to do if you eat too many edibles: stay hydrated, and remind yourself that the world isn’t ending. Pot isn’t anything like alcohol or narcotics, and for an adult, it impossible to overdose, even on edibles. All you need to do is find a safe place, drink water, and weather the storm, because nothing about marijuana is permanent. Anyway, let’s get back to it…

My story doesn’t end like a few of the good ones I’ve heard: I didn’t end up marooned in a tree or lost topless at a music festival. But I did end up on my bed, small and bundled as I fought the panic with the fetal position. I’m not going to minimize the feeling just because I’m a proponent of selling edibles to people; it’s my job to be honest with you and that’s what I’m going to do.

That night, it felt like my brain was interdimensional.

The world around me shrank and expanded, and I lost communication with my extremities somewhere along the way—there were dizzying thoughts and tumbling worries, and I just wanted it to end. Of course, I eventually passed out after an hour that was amusing only in retrospect, and the next morning, everything was right as rain. I didn’t even have a marijuana hangover, because they don’t exist. But I’ll tell you here and now that taking sixty milligrams of edible marijuana is something I’ll never do again.

But really, that doesn’t do you any good because everyone is different when it comes to edibles. We all have different metabolisms. So, while sixty milligrams might be a Hunter S. Thompson novel for me, the same dosage might not do a damn thing for you: everyone must find their own dosage. The trick is to take it slowly and not be reckless (you know, pretty much the way you’re supposed to live life), because if you do it right, an edible high is a wonderful, warm thing that you’ll want to relive over and over. So, I recommend that you start by taking a single serving, or less, and then gauge the effects. As I mentioned, at recreational shops in Colorado, everything tops out at ten milligrams per serving and one-hundred milligrams per package, so the “single serving” you should start with is ten milligrams. I rarely repeat myself or use bold typeface, but this occasion warrants a break from tradition.

Secondly, after you eat those ten milligrams, wait a solid hour before even thinking about eating more. That boldness was justified, too. For most people, it takes an entire hour before edibles start affecting the brain, and it takes two hours before you feel the full effect; the last thing you want to do is get impatient and toss more kindling into the fire. And after an hour, if the effect isn’t strong enough, remember that THC is lipid-soluble. If you’re not feeling anything, eat a handful of peanuts or half an avocado; the healthy fat will get down there and help the pot do its magic; it’s a symbiotic trick that’ll save you from an experience like mine.

Third, if you’re small like my wife, I’d recommend taking it a step further and halving that “single serving.” At The Greenery, we sell quite a few edibles that come in five milligram servings—like Highly Edible Pucks or Mountain High Sweet Pieces or Dixie Mints—and if you have a low THC tolerance, this might be the place to start.

And lastly, don’t feel like you need to remember all of this, and please don’t let it scare you away from a good time. Edible marijuana is the greatest invention since marijuana-infused sliced bread (learn how to bake it here), and all you need to do is be responsible when you experiment. As to remembering it all, at The Greenery, every single one of our budtenders knows what you just read—if you have questions, come in and ask them. If you buy edibles, and you’re interested, we’ll even throw into your bag a cheat-sheet that talks that talks about dosages and times so you don’t have to take notes. That’s the least we can do, because we’re Your Best Buds, and we want you to have a safe, enjoyable, edible time.

Best Bud of the Month

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Libby Lunda
Retail Floor Manager

Libby used to sit by a stream in Wisconsin to smoke with her friends. They’d buy quarter ounces for fifty bucks, and the stuff was just as horrid as you’d imagine: brown brick-weed that had just as many seeds and stems as it did flower. They’d load their bowls and winnow out the seeds, and then toss them in the river, watching them float away to somewhere unseen. Libby would imagine her seeds riding the rapids and then landing to sprout on an island—it was a magical garden of sorts, a place where marijuana was legal and accepted. But that place didn’t exist in Wisconsin, so when Libby grew up and had a child of her own, she moved her family to Durango, because if you think about it, this is where her seeds have come to grow; this place is the island she imagined. And now, Libby Lunda is your Best Bud of the month.

Q.  When did you start working for The Greenery?
Libby.  “I just celebrated my two-year anniversary!”

Q.  What’s your favorite way to enjoy marijuana?
Libby.  “I love bongs, and Sour Diesel is the best strain of all time.”

Q.  What’s your favorite outdoor activity?
Libby.  “Gardening and growing. I love to stand back when it’s all done and look at the aftermath. The work is worth it when you see what you’ve created.”

Q.  Tell us about your pet.
Libby.  “King is an XL Bully, and he’s a little shit. He’s a puppy trapped in a beast’s body.”

Q.  Which station do you stream while you’re working at The Greenery?
Libby.  “Top hits, or anything modern.”
(For the record, as one of Libby’s coworkers, I can tell you that when the door is shut at the end of the day, she puts on old-school rap and turns it up. Don’t be fooled by that “top hits” nonsense; Libby is a straight-up gangster.)

Q.  What do you like most about working at The Greenery?
Libby.  “I love our customers. I love getting to know the regulars and helping the tourists who are just as excited about legal marijuana as I am.”

Libby is the sort of person who combats the budtender stereotype. She isn’t in this industry because she sees it as a novelty or because she’s some stoner who’s looking for an employee discount. She’s here because she knows this industry has a future, and she’s the type of young professional who plans on capitalizing on the unique opportunity that has sprouted downstream from Wisconsin. And she really does love her customers as much as she says. I’ve seen her perk up in the middle of a bad day just to dedicate all of her attention to someone who’s just looking for some relief. Libby is a compassionate budtender who cares genuinely for each and every one of The Greenery’s customers, and because of that, she is definitely your Best Bud of the month for August. Thank you Libby!

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