recreational marijuana Archives | Page 15 of 16

Posted on August 19, 2017 - 9:00 am

marijuana, pre-roll, edible, high, pot, marijuana deals

Three people have asked me this question before I sold them marijuana. It’s a strange feeling—knowing that you’re selling pot to someone who’s only heard stories about the high—and it’s an honor to answer it. But in a way, it’s a nebulous concept, one that seems ineffable once you try to put it into words, and I had to pause mentally each time someone looked at me across the counter and asked this question.

The first gentleman who asked me what it was like to get high practiced an Orthodox faith. He was kind and paternal. He’d already spent a few years in his eighties and he was in a wheelchair, resplendent in his tailored suit. He had sharp eyes and hair so white it was translucent; he sat in his chair and looked up at me and asked if the marijuana I sold would make him hallucinate. He’d tried every prescription drug on the market, searching legally for something to alleviate the pain associated with the neuropathy that’d already cost him a leg, and he was desperate. He’d never taken any sort of recreational drug because it was forbidden: no alcohol no nicotine no marijuana. And he didn’t know what to expect—he was afraid that he might see flying animals or go mad, just as the early propaganda predicted. I took my time and described the sensation, but I’ll get to that in a little bit.

The second gentleman who asked me what it was like to get high hadn’t seen many cities. Quite literally, he drove straight to our dispensary from a compound in Utah. This man was kind too, but his clothes were simple and unadorned. His hair was the color of dried clay and his demeanor was unassuming. He didn’t suffer from pain, but he was tired of living someone else’s life. Marijuana had been forbidden to this second gentleman as well, as had coffee and profanity, and he’d decided to just jump right in and smoke something salacious after thirty-five years of abstinence. But first, he wanted to know what it was like; he wanted to be sure that the marijuana myths he’d heard wouldn’t turn true after the first puff.

The third person who asked me what it was like to get high needed a translator; we used her adult grandson. He was a patient man, one who’d been smoking for years, and he held his grandmother’s hand as she walked in. She was an archetype: she wore a permanent smile and a floral print dress with large glasses nestled into her curled, grey hair. She walked around timidly, as if the wares we sold might leap out and thwart over sixty years’ worth of resolve, but she warmed up to me almost immediately. We talked through her grandson because my Spanish es no bueno, and her biggest fear was that she’d become instantly addicted; she wanted to be assured that there was a road back from the marijuana gummies I was showing her. And she wanted to know what it was like to get high.

Well… it’s wonderful. It’s pretty much exactly what Goldilocks was looking for: not too hard, not too soft, not too debilitating and not too ineffectual. After the smoke comes in and goes out, the tension disappears. Muscles relax that you didn’t know were strained, and you smile involuntarily. Your whole body, your very soul, heaves a sigh of relief, comfort, happiness. The world starts to look bright and beautiful and you see the good you’d overlooked just a moment ago. The clothes you’re wearing start to feel like pajamas, the music you hear starts to sound symphonic, and the food you eat starts to taste like the wonderment you’d find in Wonka’s chocolate factory. It feels like you’re standing in a ray of mana that’s raining down from above just for you, and as you bathe in it, life’s worries fade to the insignificant things they truly are; the pain dwindles.

And it isn’t addictive. This has been proven scientifically time and time again. The negative side effects are laughable: xerostomia (dry-mouth), an increased appetite (bring it on), and occasional anxiety (there is such a thing as too much of a good thing). In fact, and I tell this to worried customers all the time, marijuana is the second safest recreational drug out there. I’m sure you’ve read all the articles out there like this one, but just in case you haven’t, the super-smart people over at The Global Drug Survey have crunched all the numbers and compiled all the data (like emergency room visits), and they’ve ranked the nine most popular recreational drugs as per the danger associated with each one. Magical Mushrooms are the least dangerous, marijuana is a close second, and alcohol (you know, that socially accepted stuff) comes close to beating out meth as the worst stuff out there. Figures.

Frankly, I’m not sure why someone wouldn’t try marijuana—life needs to be lived—and when first-timers fall into my lap, I do my duty. I tell them the truth, and I describe what it’s like to get high honestly, sans flying animals and madness, and I make sure they leave our dispensary with the comfort that comes from making the right decision. As a budtender at The Greenery, that’s my job, and as one of Your Best Buds, it’s my pleasure.

The Greenery Hits a Theme Song

Posted on August 5, 2017 - 9:00 am

The Greenery, dispensary deals, marijuana, pot shop

Darth Vader is cool only because he has theme music. Granted, the lightsaber helps a little bit, as does his freaky ability to choke fools from a distance, but if it wasn’t for the sonorous, tonal music that follows Vader wherever he goes, he’d be average at best. All the other aliens in that far, far away galaxy wouldn’t even notice when he walked in the room, despite his awkward breathing, and there’s no way he could pull off that goth cape without his theme song. It’s sad, but true.

That’s why I’ve always wanted theme music. Sometimes, when I’m especially high, my brain obliges. I’ll be walking from point “A” to point “B,” and something groovy will start playing in my head. My walk will morph into a strut, and I’ll start humming “Stayin’ Alive” by The Bee Gees. The world around me will slow down and start to sparkle, and I’ll bob my head to the rhythm. And if that were to ever happen in the real-world, I’d know that I’ve arrived, because anybody who’s anybody has theme music.

Think about it. When the President of the United States steps up to the podium, he’s accompanied by brazen fanfare—an entire orchestra announces his arrival with pomp and circumstance. When Stephan Colbert steps on stage, his audience knows it thanks to his Late Show theme song. Hell, a couple years ago at The Oscars, Tom Hanks got pissed-off because the band played the Forest Gump song when he walked on stage instead of the song from whatever movie he starred in that week; Tom Hanks is so famous he has multiple theme songs. That’s just crazy. But now, The Greenery is catching up to his level, because we have a theme song too—put that in your box of chocolates, Mr. Gump.

Dexter Davis is a student at Arkansas State, an artist who goes by ICEberg Slim, and he sent us his song a few weeks back. It’s called “The Greenery,” and really, it’s just a happy coincidence; the song has nothing in common with our dispensary save for its title, and Slim has never walked through our door. But theme songs don’t just fall from the sky every day, so for this blog, at least, we’re coopting Slim’s song as our own. And the song is alright. It sounds like the type of music Shaft would wake-and-bake to—warm and scratchy, vinyl straight from the turntable, it’s an old-school stoner jam.

Listen to it here, and then come in to tell us what you think. Feel free to walk through our door humming your own personal theme song, because your best buds won’t judge you. We know exactly what it’s like having a theme song, thanks to Dexter Davis, and just like Darth Vader, The Greenery has arrived.

Dexter Davis, Iceberg Slim, marijuana song — Dexter Davis, aka ICEberg Slim, at a recent performance.

Indica vs. Sativa

Posted on July 22, 2017 - 9:00 am

There’re over four-thousand different strains of marijuana growing across the globe, sprouting like the wondrous weeds they are, but each of them falls into one of two categories: Indica or Sativa. Of course, most strains have been crossbred so many times that it’s difficult to tell which is which, and just about everything out there is a hybrid thanks to the incestuous way plants get together and make more plants—after decades of desultory pollination, there’s no longer a definite line in the sand between the two categories, and that can make things difficult when you’re chasing the effects that come from one side or the other.

But at The Greenery, we’re here to help. We know the lineage of each strain we sell and we’ve smoked all of them. We can tell you which bud will make you sleepy, which bud will perk you up, just like that Cheshire cat could tell Alice which side would make her bigger, which side would make her small. But before we get into specific strains, we should discuss the two, overarching categories so you have a jumping off place; we’ll start with Sativa.

You probably drew a Sativa leaf on your notebook back in high school. Yes, all pot leaves have the same number of fronds and they’re instantly recognizable thanks to the jagged edges, but Sativa leaves are a little different than their fatter Indica cousins. They’re light green and thin and they spread out perfectly to form the symbol we use for all marijuana. And the plant itself is special too. It can grow into a veritable tree, standing over two-stories high if you let it, but most varieties top-out at around ten feet.

Sativa is a day-time pot. The high is energetic and creative, and it’ll give you a bright haze that’s perfect for summer days, happy times. These cerebral strains live in your head and pollinate your thoughts with creativity, they make you giggle and go out, connect with what’s important. Sativa strains should remind you of tie-died T-shirts and road trips and the highlife we’ve been trying to recapture from the hippie days our parents reminisce about. And from a medical standpoint, these strains can battle back pain and headaches and depression, and for some, they can even act as an appetite suppressor, thereby destroying the “munchies” stereotype you see in cliché pot movies. However, I’d be lax if I didn’t tell you about Sativa’s darker side, so I’ll be honest about the possible negative side effects: with one puff too many, these strains are more likely to bring with them anxiety and paranoia. But you know what? Given that traditional pharmaceuticals and other recreational drugs (like booze) can kill you, I’d say a little anxiety is worth it (there’s no such thing as a pot writer who doesn’t toss in a caveat like that, so please forgive me).

Now, on to Indica—these varieties are famous for their dark green, broad leaves, and a musky scent. The plants themselves are short and squat, usually topping out at about six feet, and they’re originally from India and the Middle East (ergo, the name). Indica is a nighttime pot, perfect for good movies and comfortable blankets thanks to the body-high these strains bring with them. This strain should remind you of relaxed, fragrant evenings and smiling camels and that odd sitar music that makes sand dunes so exotic. Medicinally speaking, Indica strains can help with appetite stimulation and insomnia and anxiety relief. But one puff too many can put you down, and lethargy or insatiable munchies are the worst you can expect. It’s a cheesy one-liner, but all you need to remember is that “Indica will put you in-da-couch.” It’s the down to Sativa’s up, the mellow yin to Sativa’s energetic yang. And it’s wonderful.

Personally, before I started working in a dispensary, I used to think that Indica was the way to go, and that Sativa wasn’t for me. And now, I meet people who think the same way (or visa-versa) every day. They’ll come in and say something like “I hate Sativa because it makes me paranoid,” and they’ll ignore completely any of our Sativa-dominant hybrids. For the record, I don’t judge these people because my tastes used to run parallel to theirs. But now I’ve learned a few things, and I share them with as many customers as possible. At The Greenery, we always have at least ten, top-shelf strains available for purchase—five are Indica-dominant, and five are Sativa-dominant. You can see them here on our menu.

However, it’s the “dominant” in the description you need to pay attention to, because like I said, there’s really no such thing as a pure Indica or a pure Sativa anymore because just about everything out there has been mixed with everything else. But you know what? This is a good thing. Now, if you ask the right people (like us), you can find a perfect 50/50 hybrid that’ll give you both the head high that comes from Sativa and the body high that comes from Indica. If you come in and ask us, we can show you 70/30 strains that lean closer to the Sativa side of the spectrum—these can give you creativity and relaxation at the same time which can be sublimely mind-blowing. Or we can point you towards a 70/30 Indica-leaning strain that’ll bring with it deep body relaxation and a touch of the giggles. Isn’t that awesome?

Seriously, here at The Greenery, we can do that for you, and we won’t lead you astray as you bounce back and forth in the Indica vs. Sativa battle. Come in and tell us the specific high you’re looking for, and we’ll give you options. We’ll let you smell them and buy them at a fair price, and we’ll pay attention to your feedback. That’s how it should be, and that’s how it is with Your Best Buds.

Indica vs Sativa, Sativa vs Indica, Indica dominant, Platinum OG Bud, Platinum OG — The Greenery menu description for an Indica-dominant strain.

Marijuana Sales Tax

Posted on July 13, 2017 - 8:00 am

Easter Island is a dark place. It’s an atoll sheltered by isolation deep within the Pacific Ocean, and it’s hard to hear the lessons that island screams because it’s too far away—leagues of surf and time have quieted the prescient warning. Think about it: when you first read the words “Easter Island,” you pictured one of those gigantic stone heads and scoffed at the notion that something so comical could come from a “dark place,” so you probably don’t believe me; you probably don’t know that those gigantic stone heads are the only remnants of a once proud culture that committed suicide with greed.

As a side note, yes, this is a blog about marijuana taxation, and yes, I promise to get to that in a second, but first, we need to go back a little bit (just bear with me because I promise it’ll all make sense in the end). So, here we go…

The Moai

The Rapa Nui were fierce voyagers. They made their clothing from palm fronds, their skin was covered with black tattoos. They lived off the ocean and first made landfall on the shores of Easter Island around thirteen-hundred years ago. Back then, the island was a paradise. It was tall and safe, with sheltering cliffs that broke incoming storms—egg-laying birds had made a rookery out of those cliffs, and the flocks were thick enough to feed all the Rapa Nui. The high-rolling hills of Easter Island were forested with budding fruit trees, the valleys were verdant and rich with fresh water. And the island lizards were so majestic that rainbows shot out of their asses every morning at sunrise… That last sentence wasn’t one-hundred percent accurate, but you get the point: the Rapa Nui had found a home better than the sea, so there they stayed.

But then one day, some dude carved one of those gigantic stone heads. And then some other dude on the other side of the island saw the gigantic stone head and decided to carve his own. This one was a little bit bigger, a little bit better. The carving started to spread. Things started to change. The Rapa Nui started felling their forests faster than the fronds could grow. Wood was needed for scaffolding and for the moving of larger and larger stones, and barren patches started to appear on the rolling hills of Easter Island like a metastasized cancer. The rookeries were picked clean, and if the biologists are to be believed, an entire species of cliff-dwelling seabird was eaten into extinction because the Rapa Nui were too busy carving gigantic stone heads to farm. The meat ran out and the forests disappeared and those island people who once lived on the sea turned to the caves. They dug into the hills, and in the end when things were at their worst, the Rapa Nui embraced cannibalism. The last man died one-thousand years after the first man landed, and all they left behind was a barren island covered with eight-hundred and eighty-seven gigantic stone heads called “The Moai.”

Greed did that; greed did all of that. And it’s not like our species has evolved that much in the three-hundred years that’ve passed since the Rapa Nui started eating each other; that same brand of insular capitalization is alive and well in our culture today. When we stumble upon something good, we milk it and milk it until there’s not much left to bleed dry, and then we move on to the next craze, the next thing to consume and use up. Today, right here right now in Durango, Colorado, we’re milking recreational marijuana by taxing the hell out of it.

For the record, I’m not saying that if we overtax marijuana we’ll turn to cannibalism like the Rapa Nui because that would be far too hyperbolic even for someone who smokes as much as I do. But I am saying that if we’re not responsible—if we don’t battle back the greed that defines our species—we’ll ruin something wonderful just as it’s starting to grow. And in that vein, the amount of sales tax that’s applied to recreational marijuana in this town is ludicrous. I’ll give you an example to prove my point. The total sales tax someone in Durango pays when he or she buys alcohol is 7.9%; three percent goes to the city, two percent goes to the county, and the remainder goes to the state. But when someone buys recreational marijuana in this town, he or she pays 20% in sales tax; three percent goes to the city, two percent goes to the county, and an exorbitant fifteen percent goes to the state of Colorado (and to make it more confusing, fifteen percent of that fifteen percent also comes back to Durango).

Doesn’t that seem somewhat unfair? I mean seriously, wouldn’t you think that the root cause behind drunk-driving fatalities should be taxed more than the reason this town is seeing such a boom in tourism? And to make it worse, “they” are considering a five percent increase in marijuana-related sales taxes in this town, thereby charging more than three times the rate levied against alcohol sales. The bump would all go to our city. It sucks, but you can read about it here in The Durango Herald if you’d like (a couple of your Best Buds from The Greenery were even interviewed).

To switch gears, I will admit that from the outside looking in, it probably seems like local marijuana dispensaries are making money hand over fist, and it probably seems like a good idea to tax the hell out of legal weed so this town can prosper. But unfortunately, statements like these are rife with ignorance. You see, marijuana dispensaries are taxed twice: we have to pay an extortionate amount of tax when we buy our pot wholesale, and then believe it or not, we have to pay anywhere from sixty to seventy percent in federal income tax after we sell our marijuana to the community (yes, you heard that right, the federal government doesn’t see anything wrong with taxing an industry that they refuse to legalize). At the end of the day, our profit margins are just as thin as they are in traditional retail industries, and we simply cannot afford another tax increase, especially since we’re still recovering from the one that just went into effect on July first.

The reason for this is that we simply cannot lower the retail prices on our quality marijuana and stay in business; we’d have to keep our base price constant and hope with crossed fingers that people would be willing to pay higher prices for legal weed. But would they? If this new tax is accepted and implemented, and top-shelf pot starts selling for around sixty-three dollars an eighth in this town, do you think people will still buy it legally, or do you think they’ll go back to “their guy” who sells the same bag of pot for fifty bucks on the street? Do you see what I mean? We’re taking too much; we’re chopping down too many trees. I know this tax sounds just a little bit bigger, a little bit better, but it’s just too much. It’s just another gigantic stone head when we already have plenty of Moai. It’s more than this small island of Durango can support, and our industry needs your help. So please, call our city representatives and county commissioners and tell them that we’re already paying enough; you can find city council contact information via this link and county commissioners contact info via this link. Or use our letter to mail your concern, Letter to County, City on Marijuana Tax. Or better yet, please attend the upcoming County Commissioner Meeting at 5:30pm on July 20th in the Board Room of the County Administration Building and the City Council meeting at 6:30pm on August 15^th in the Smith Chambers at City Hall and fight against this initiative because in the end, such a tax could limit your options when it comes to purchasing legal marijuana.

Thank you,

-The Greenery

LEARN MORE FACTS & DATA ON MARIJUANA TAXATION here Marijuana Tax Facts

Best Bud of the Month

Posted on July 12, 2017 - 7:18 pm

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Melissa Nichols
Vendor & Community Relations Manager

Some Navy Seals can hold their breath for seven minutes; they go through all sorts of ninja training to get to that point. But at The Greenery, we have a budtender who can hold her breath for seventy-two seconds; she discovered her talent while playing dead-man games in Mexico because you’re never too old to mess with foreign lifeguards.

Melissa Nichols is simply awesome. She’s an open book who loves what she does, and we love having her here, but being our Community Relations Manager wasn’t her first job; Mel used to be a professional naked person. She posed in the nude for a sculpting class two hours per day, three times a week, for six weeks (if you do the math, that’s thirty-six hours’ worth of nudity in front of strangers). And I’m sure that if you looked long and hard enough, you’d probably be able to find a miniature, sculpted, naked Melissa at a local garage sale (we hereby promise a $1 pre-roll joint to anyone who brings one in). But here’s the rest of her story.

Q. When did you start working for The Greenery?
Melissa. “I was the first budtender on the payroll, and I was behind the counter when Wally (our first customer) gave us the twenty-dollar bill that’s hanging in the back office.”

Q. What’s your favorite way to enjoy marijuana?
Melissa. “I love water pipes, and Cheese is my all-time favorite strain.”

Q. What’s your favorite outdoor activity?
Melissa. “I love snowboarding and hiking, but what I love most is connecting with the outdoors. I love taking time to myself outside and just breathing, looking at the life and nature around me, the bugs and plants, because it helps me connect with what’s important.”

Q. Tell us about your pet.
Melissa. “Mr. Mac is a black cat, and Prince Hal is a cat colored like a cow. He’s a Holstein cat. And Tigger is our yellow lab. We got him too late to do anything about his name.”

Q. Which station do you stream while you’re working at The Greenery?
Melissa. “alt-J radio, or any of the Tiny Desk Concerts on NPR; they’re just awesome.”

Q. What do you like most about working at The Greenery?
Melissa. “People are happy when they come into our store, and I get to make them happier. And I don’t have to censor myself when I’m working here, so I absolutely love it.”

And that’s Melissa. She’s the type of person who’s more comfortable barefoot—I’ve seen her afterhours, walking around in her colorful socks, making small foot-fists on the foamy pads behind our sales counter, and that says a lot about a person. She isn’t afraid to be who she is, and even though you might not believe it, she really is just as nice as she comes across when she asks for your ID. Melissa is a genuine and open person, and she’s worked diligently over the past two and a half years to make The Greenery Durango’s best dispensary. And that, my friends, is why Melissa Nichols is you Best Bud of the Month.

Cheers! The Greenery, Budtender, Durango

Medicinal Marijuana

Posted on July 1, 2017 - 9:00 am

The Greenery is a recreational-only marijuana dispensary. However, we offer a twenty-percent discount to medical patients (so long as you can show us a valid Colorado MMJ card), and we do so for good reason: for many people, marijuana really is effective.

Frankly, most people buy pot to get high, and there’s nothing wrong with that. When they walk through our doors, they’re looking for THC (Tetrahydrocannabinol), plain and simple, because it’s the psychoactive compound in pot that can turn any frown upside-down. However, THC is just one of the cannabinoids found in flower—there’re least one-hundred and thirteen of them of them in marijuana—and as the THC percentage increases, the amount of the others decreases. The proverbial “they” still don’t know what most of the other cannabinoids do, but I’m sure it’s only good things, and if you shop only for a high THC percentage, you might be missing out on a few other benefits. Specifically, the higher the THC level climbs, the lower the CBD (Cannabidiol) and CBN (Cannabinol) levels fall. If you’re a medical marijuana patient, or if you’ve always wanted to try pot to see if it helps you, this is something you need to know.

CBD isn’t psychoactive (it won’t get you high), so most people don’t pay too much attention to it. However, the stuff is wonderful. It’s been called the compound that gives you “relaxation without intoxication,” and it brings with it a whole smattering of additional properties. I’ve read studies that show CBD may combat everything from PTSD to epileptic seizures, and from personal experience, I attest to CBD’s ability to fight my insomnia. Here at The Greenery, we always have a high CBD strain on the shelves, and our friendly budtenders can show you a wide variety of CBD-infused edibles or topicals if you’d rather not smoke flower to try CBD.

CBN won’t get you high either, but it looks to be just as promising as CBD. According to Steep Hill, “The consumption of 2.5mg to 5mg of CBN has the same level of sedation as a mild pharmaceutical sedative, with a relaxed body sensation similar to 5mg to 10mg of diazepam.” Isn’t that crazy? CBN is a non-psychoactive plant derivative with no known side effects, and it’s twice as effective as a nasty, old-school pharmaceutical. Secondly, you can buy CBN tablets from The Greenery for a fraction of the price you’d pay for an artificial chemical at the pharmacy. CBN has been shown to do all sorts of things, and if you’re looking for some alternative options, this compound is a great place to start.

Look, I know it’s possible that I just created for you more questions than I answered, and the breadth of alternative cannabis is far too wide to address a laconic post like this one. There’re plenty of online resources out there you can use to answer CBD and CBN related questions, but The Greenery is right here in Durango, and personally, I like talking to people instead of Google. So, come in and see your best buds. Ask us your questions about CBD and CBN, and we’ll show you all the available options, because that’s why we’re here. And as always, please remember that we cannot provide medical advice and recommend you consult with your healthcare provider before introducing any marijuana products into your regimen.

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THC Percentage

Posted on June 24, 2017 - 10:00 am

Some days, life’s stressors need a little numbing, and something strong is called for, like a kickass Sativa that’ll fill your lungs and banish the bullshit. And for occasions like that, The Greenery sells Chemmy Jones. This stuff is ridiculous. We don’t always have it on our shelves because the demand is so high, but the THC level comes in at a world-record forty-percent, the flower smells like a science experiment, and the high hits you like a back-handed pimp slap. It isn’t a complex high, but it’s energetic and strong and perfect for the days when the tedium doesn’t seem to stop. But what about the other days? What about the days when you’re just looking to relax a little bit, and what about the days when you’d like to be high and functional at the same time?

Every marijuana writer in the history of marijuana writers has made a comparison between pot and alcohol because it’s such an easy analogy, and I’m about to do the same thing even though it borders on a cliché, so bear with me… Chemmy Jones is like 151 Rum—a spirit so strong it requires a metal flame suppressor on every bottle so they don’t explode spontaneously around candles. And sometimes, 151 is exactly what you need (especially if you’re in the mood to light your face on fire and become a YouTube sensation). But 151 won’t always work because your friends will start to worry if they catch you drinking it on a Tuesday. So, especially for week-days when others are watching, most people prefer beer or wine; beverages that’re enjoyable thanks to their lower alcohol content and flavor profiles. Likewise, there’s a pot for that: Flo.

Flo, Recreational Marijuana, High THC,
Flo is a strain that’s usually on our menu because we grow it (if you come into our shop and look to your right, you’ll see a large-screen TV showing a live-feed of our grow if you don’t believe me). And our guys know what they’re doing: Flo is flavorful and understated with a comfortable, happy high that’s perfect for summer days. If Chemmy Jones is 151 on a blurry Saturday night, then Flo is a cold Mexican Logger after work. For the record, Flo still packs a punch and it’ll get the job done after an especially trying Monday, but with a THC percentage hovering between eighteen and twenty-four percent, you’ll still be able to form coherent sentences after smoking it. Doesn’t that sound nice? Flo usually sells out quickly as well, but if you call or come in, one of our friendly budtenders can point you towards something comparable.

At The Greenery, we have a wide variety of strains that offer an equally wide variety of effects. We have deep Indica strains that’ll put you in the couch, we have strong Sativa strains that’ll leave your brain buzzing, and we have everything in-between. But I want you to know that if you always shop for a high THC percentage, you might be missing out on a few truly spectacular strains like Flo. Yes, I know the choices can seem overwhelming, and sometimes, it’s easiest just to buy the pot with the most THC, but I’d invite you to check out our menu before deciding. Each strain will have a little “+” symbol next to the name, and if you click on it, it’ll give you a complete description of the strain and of the high you can expect from smoking it, and it’ll display the associated THC percentage. But please, if you’d rather talk to a human, we’re always here. Just shoot us a comment via our “contact us” page, call us at (970) 403-3710, or visit us at 208 Parker Ave. We’ll do our best to answer any strain-specific questions you might have, and we’ll get you what you need, be it something over the top that’ll erase a bad day, or something mild that’s easy to enjoy with your Best Buds.

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Best Bud of the Month

Posted on June 17, 2017 - 10:00 am

Sam Redman

Inventory/Metrc (Marijuana Enforcement Tracking Reporting Compliance)/POS Manager

Sam Redman is The Greenery’s very own Renaissance man. He’s an intellectual—one who can wear a denim jacket and pull it off—and he’s done all the things the rest of us just want to do: he camped in the backwoods of France for five months on end; he traveled the world just to see what he could see; he’s the front-man of a badass funk and hip-hop fusion band, Diabolical Sound Platoon. And he’s a great guy to work with. He usually stays in the back, crunching numbers at his standing desk while a podcast plays in the background, but he runs to the register when the rush hits, and he serves our customers with an affable smile, an easy laugh. Sam helped build The Greenery, lending to our company culture his eloquence and attention to detail—he’s a cornerstone in our team, an all-around cool guy, and he’s your Best Bud of the month.

Q. When did you start working for The Greenery?
Sam. “A month before we opened.”

According to a fellow budtender, “Sam is kind of a big deal,” because he’s been here from day-one. He strapped on a tool belt and put in the floor our customers walk on daily, and he’s been managing our ever-changing, quicksilver inventory ever since.

Q. What’s your favorite way to enjoy marijuana?
Sam. “I don’t have one. I like all of it, from dabbing to vaporizing to smoking flower.”

Q. What’s your favorite outdoor activity?
Sam. “Bouldering. It’s a concentrated, gymnastic way up the rock, with pads and chalk, but no ropes. It’s climbing rendered down to its essence. I love solving bouldering problems, and I’ve authored a few local first-ascents, like ‘Al Montana.’”

Q. Tell us about your pet.
Sam. “Logan is a manly Maine Coon, but he isn’t named after Wolverine. He’s nineteen years old, and he got his name before Hugh Jackman was cool.”

It was early morning a few years ago, and Sam was sleeping when he heard his roommates screaming that “Logan had caught a bird.” Sam ran buck-naked into the living room to find Logan battling a bona fide turkey vulture with one of those wingspans you usually see only on The Discovery Channel. So Sam jumped into the fray and grabbed the monstrous bird while his roommates pointed and laughed, despite the fact that naked bird wrestling is a serious situation. Sam ran to the window with his prize and knocked out the bug screen while his foe fought with talons and screeching bird noises. Sam released the vulture into the air (no doubt in slow-motion, looking like a rugged falconer), and it took flight immediately without looking back. Logan was pissed for weeks, never truly forgiving Sam for his intervention, but that’s just the way cats are.

Q. Which station do you stream while you’re working at The Greenery?
Sam. “I like cold-wave and podcasts. Lately, I’ve been listening to a lot of Neil DeGrasse Tyson.”

Q. What do you like most about working at The Greenery?
Sam. “I love our customers, and the challenging aspect of controlling our extensive inventory.”

And there you have it. Frankly, this company is what it is in a large part thanks to Sam’s contributions. He’s a witty guy with a cunning repertoire of pickup lines, and he’s a knowledgeable budtender. The next time you come in, look for the guy in a jeans-jacket and say “hi.” Strike up a conversation about flat-earthers and tell Sam they might be on to something. He loves that kind of stuff…

Sam Redman, Budtender, The Greenery, Durango, CO, marijuana Sam solving some marijuana mutha-fucking mysteries at his post.

Foria

Posted on June 10, 2017 - 10:00 am

There’s no such thing as a comfortable conversation about suppositories. Well, not usually, anyway, but you and I are going to have one right now; the buffering shield of anonymity protects us both from embarrassment. And for the record, I know you clicked the “yes, I’m twenty-one” tab to enter this site, so we’re going to talk about this like grownups. Anyway, here we go…

The Greenery is now offering two new marijuana infused products, both of which are produced by Foria, specifically “Pleasure” and “Relief.” The first comes in a 5 milliliter spray bottle that delivers 2.5 milligrams per application—here comes the adult part: the suggested use is to spray one dose “directly onto the clitoris, inner and outer labia, and inside the vagina.” You’ll need to allow up to fifteen minutes for Pleasure to take effect, and this product isn’t approved for use with latex condoms, but other than that, there’s not much you need to know. Women who’ve used this product say that Pleasure enables better, multiple orgasms that’re easier to access, and that Pleasure may help with improved, natural lubrication. Of course, since this product delivers THC, it may also bring with it the classical effects associated with marijuana: deep-body relaxation, a sound night’s sleep, and for some, a slight high. And if you think about it, a product like this makes sense. Cannabis products have been known to increase blood flow, and that’s the main prerequisite for sexual pleasure. The Greenery is offering Pleasure for $25 before tax per bottle, and if you’d like more information, just go to www.foriapleasure.com.

See? We made it through that wonderfully. Neither one of us giggled, which proves that we’re mature enough to move on to the vaginal suppository.

Look, I know that last sentence ended with a jarring pair of words, but it is what it is, and this product might bring some real relief to women who need it, so it’s worth discussion. And Foria’s Relief is all over the internet, so much so that it has earned the somewhat misleading nickname of “weed tampon,” so it’s important that we dispel any of the misconceptions associated with this product before you walk in our door; Relief is in fact not a tampon. Also, these posts are pretty short, so after you’ve read what we have to say about it, we’d recommend going to Relief’s FAQ page here for further information.

In short, each package of Relief (which we’re selling for $25 before tax) includes two suppositories; each one contains 10 milligrams of THC and 60 milligrams of CBD. Women who’ve tried this product have reported “a significant decrease in the pain and discomfort often associated with menstruation,” per Foria’s testimonies. The THC may help via the nervous system by blocking pain signals and boosting pleasure, and the CBD may help with inflammation and cramps. Also, given the 10 milligrams of THC per dose, it’s possible that users might experience a high, but Foria has this product listed as “non-psychoactive,” so results may vary. The science makes sense, and the only other ingredient in each suppository is organic cocoa butter, so we at The Greenery think that Relief is a worthy addition to our menu, but it’s always prudent to consult your physician before trying a product such as Relief.

And that’s it; we’re done. I typed out five-hundred words that’d make me blush and break eye-contact in the real world, and you sat where you’re sitting and read about The Greenery’s newest products in privacy. However, I know that reading about a product and actually buying it are two completely different things; you might still harbor a touch of trepidation about coming into our store and ordering one of these products from a stranger with a straight face. So, I have a suggestion: use our convenient call-ahead service. Just give us a shout at (970) 403-3710 and tell us what you’d like to try. We’ll put some Pleasure in a white paper bag, or some Relief, if you’d prefer, and we’ll set aside your order discreetly—we’ll write your first name on the bag, and nothing more. Tell us your name when you come in, we’ll ring up your order without making a big deal out if it, and then you can go on your way comfortably.

Or, if this is how you roll, just come in, walk up to the register, and tell us what you want loud and proud. Ask us questions, if you have any after reading this, and we’ll answer them accurately and seriously. After all, we’re profesionals, and that’s how we’ll treat you, because that’s what you’ve come to expect from your best buds.

-The Greenery

Floria Pleasure, The Greenery, Recreational Marijuana Foria Relief, The Greenery

Discretion

Posted on May 20, 2017 - 3:12 pm

The Greenery checks age requirements in Colorado

Marijuana is perfectly legal for recreational use in Colorado, and frankly, it should be. Pot is a plant that grows out of the ground, and if you light it on fire and breathe in the smoke, it makes you feel good. For many, it’s a medicine—one that doesn’t bring with it the crippling side effects commonly associated with traditional pharmaceuticals—and medicine should be legal. It’s a simple truth, one that’s axiomatic to those of us who know the difference between right and wrong, and that’s why I support legalized marijuana; that’s why I’ve chosen to work in this industry.

However, I also understand that not everybody feels this way. Plenty of people still think that pot is a problem. They look at that plant and see a vice that needs to be eradicated, and they subscribe to the antiquated paradigm that kept marijuana illegal for decades. Some people fear change; that’s just the way it is. So, occasionally, discretion is necessary.

I’m one of the fortunate few who can be who I am both at work and in my personal life because my coworkers, friends, and family all have modern views regarding marijuana. In short, I don’t have to hide the fact that I smoke pot—hell, I’m pretty loud about it sometimes. But you might not have that luxury, and here at The Greenery, we understand, and we offer a level of discretion you won’t find at other dispensaries.

For one, we have a discreet location. We’re nestled in at 208 Parker Avenue, right behind Morehart Murphy. We’re close enough to be convenient, but far enough away to keep things comfortable. When you leave our shop, you won’t have to run that downtown gamut where it seems like you recognize everyone around you on the street. You won’t have to walk down a long alley carrying a bag full of marijuana back to your car parked on Main; you won’t have to feed a meter. We’re open early and we close late, and you can come and go with a level of privacy not offered elsewhere. But that’s not the most important part: here at The Greenery, we don’t track your purchases.

I’ll admit that I shopped around at other dispensaries before I worked at The Greenery. I was a creature of habit, and I didn’t stray far from my home when I went shopping, be it for groceries or marijuana; I usually stayed on the north-side of town for convenience. And it didn’t really bother me that the other dispensaries tracked my purchases (you know, because I’m “loud about it”), but in retrospect, the practice is a little sketchy.

I’m sure you’ve noticed it. Most dispensaries will swipe your ID when you walk in to make sure you’re twenty-one. One place even has a metal turnstile that opens only after you’ve swiped your card, in case you’ve ever wondered what it’d be like to get carded by a robot. But guess what: every time your ID is swiped, the machine keeps a record of your visit. So here at the Greenery, we take the time to read your ID by hand. Granted, it might take us a little longer because we have to check diligently your picture and your birthdate and your card’s expiration date, but that’s something we do for you because it’s your business if you buy marijuana, and nobody else’s.

Secondly, we don’t track your purchases at the register. True, we have a loyalty program—an awesome one that I’ll tell you about in a different post—but we use punch cards instead of an electronic system. There’re other dispensaries here in Durango that keep track of every single purchase you make, and they do so via a computer database that’s just as vulnerable to hacking as all the other systems in this inescapable digital age. With the click of a mouse, anyone who cares to look can find a record of all the marijuana you’ve purchased, and considering the fact that federal laws haven’t yet caught up to our local ones, some people prefer the discretion offered here at The Durango Greenery.

So, come see us, your best buds. Come find a place in our parking lot and walk through our front door. Someone will check your ID with a smile and then give it back without recording your visit. We’ll sell so you some ridiculously good pot, and then you can go on your way, legally, rightfully, and discreetly. Cheers.

We’re Your Best Buds!