I can’t tell you how much I love Jeopardy, nor can I express how saddened I am given Alex Trebek’s stage-four cancer. It’s a tragedy, but I’ve found that I’ve been watching his show much more than usual because I want to soak it all up before the era ends. And lately, my favorite category is “Potpourri,” but it has nothing to do with the fact that “pot” is in the word; I love the fact that you never know what you’re going to get. I’m sure the show’s writers use the category as a catchall when they’re lazy because it’s always a bunch of unrelated questions, but I still like the unpredictability. So, this week, I’m going to copy the format and write about three unrelated topics because I’ve been wanting to write about each one for a while, but none of the topics is important enough to merit its own blog. That, and I apologize if you started reading this thinking that I was going to tell you how to make potpourri out of pot; I’m not because it’d be a waste to do so.
Don’t Lick Your Joint
The first topic I’d like to talk about is a PSA of sorts: please stop licking joints if they start to run. There’s nothing worse than smoking a joint with someone who thinks they’re a pro because without fail, if the joint starts to burn unevenly, said “pro” will lick their finger and then put a little spit on the joint just below the run. This is disgusting. Yes, the moisture will make the running part of the joint burn more slowly so the run stops, but then you’ll be smoking spit, which is wholly unnecessary. Instead, use your lighter to burn the part of the joint that’s not burning instead of using spit to stop something else from burning; it works much better. See what I mean? That topic only took a paragraph to cover, so it doesn’t deserve its own blog, but it’s an important one because I’d love it if people stopped spitting on my joints, so it had to be discussed; that’s the beauty of potpourri blogs.
How to Clean Your Pipe
The next topic we need to discuss is “how to clean pipes” because customers ask me about the best way to clean paraphernalia at least twice a day. As you know, commercialism is alive and well in the marijuana industry, and entrepreneurs have come up with just about everything imaginable to sell, including something called “ResRemover.” This product is a pouch filled with dry chemicals: all you do is add water, and then drop in your pipe to leave in the solution overnight. The chemical solution eats away all the resin, and then when you wake up in the morning, you’re greeted with a clean pipe. This method is easy, but just like licking joints, it’s gross. I have no idea which chemicals are in that bag but I’m sure you end up smoking them, and once you’re done, you’re left with a plastic bag full of a chemical solution mixed with pot resin that ends up in a landfill. Please don’t do that.
Instead, get a reusable container (just like you’d use for leftovers) and fill it with rubbing alcohol and a couple tablespoons of salt. Stir the solution thoroughly, drop in your pipe, and then let it sit overnight. The salt and alcohol create a chemical reaction that dissolves the resin and cleans your pipe just like the other stuff, but you know exactly what you’re using because you made the solution, and you’re not left with a disposable bag afterwards. The planet thanks you. However, if alcohol and salt still sound too caustic for you, you can always put your pipe in a pot of boiling water, which will also clean out the resin, but this method makes your house stink, and most people end up dropping their pipes because they’re too hot when they come out of the boiling water. Breaking a freshly-cleaned pipe defeats the purpose, so I’d try the alcohol and salt method if I were you.
Holding Your Hit
Finally, the last topic we need to discuss is holding in your hit. I’ll get right to it: don’t do this. Yes, holding in the smoke after a hit will allow more THC to absorb in your lungs before exhaling, but it’s pointless. The only reason people used to do this “back in the day” was that pot was illegal and difficult to find as a result, so people wanted to get the most out of every hit. But nowadays, you can simply drive to the store to score some weed and Google Maps will even help you find our Durango dispensary. So, instead of trying to hold smoke in your lungs until you pass out (which probably isn’t good for you) so you can get as high as possible, simply inhale and then exhale. You might need to take a couple more hits to achieve the perfect high, but it won’t be as harsh an experience, and pot is everywhere in the modern world, so it’s not like you’ll run out and then need to wait for some sketchy dude in a parking lot like yesteryear.
There, wasn’t that fun? I’m sure we’ll have a few more catchall blogs like this popping up in the future, so stay tuned, or better yet, come talk to us. You can always give us a call at (970) 403-3710 if you have questions about this or that, or you can some see us in person at our dispensary on 208 Parker Avenue so we can chat in person. Because if you like to discuss random marijuana topics, I promise We’re Your Best Buds!