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Different Marijuana Strains

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Please keep an open mind when I tell you this: it’s very important to stop thinking that you really like a specific strain just because you “tried it this one time” and really liked it. And it’s also important to stop thinking that you don’t like a strain because you didn’t like it that “one time.” Trust me.

I can’t tell you how many times it’s happened to me. A customer will walk in and ask something like, “what’s your best sativa strain right now?” I’ll say something like, “the White Widow is wonderful,” to which this hypothetical customer will respond, “oh, no thank you; I tried some White Widow once and it was horrible.” This is when I take a deep breath and explain that not all White Widows are created equally, but what I really want to do is say this:

Imagine two White Widow seeds siting on a table. A monkey walks up to the table and takes home one of the seeds; he grows it in a ditch and waters it with barbecue sauce. The other seed is taken home by a scientist. He grows it professionally in his lab under specifically engineered lights while controlling the CO2 in the air to increase photosynthesis. Now, if you were to wait until both plants were mature, and then set them side-by-side, they’d look nothing alike. If you smoked a little of each, they’d neither taste nor smell anything alike (the monkey’s pot would remind you of brisket). And the high that came from each plant would differ greatly.

Do you see what I’m getting at? We’re the scientists in this situation. It doesn’t mean that you won’t like our White Widow just because you didn’t like the White Widow you got from a monkey elsewhere. After all, way back when, growers named the strains they bred simply to keep track of them, and because it was cool. But now, those names have morphed into brands, and as such, people think they know what to expect from a certain strain. Nothing could be further from the truth, so as a PSA, I’d like to tell you this: when it comes to cannabis strains, the name isn’t nearly as important as most people think. What matters is who grew the plant, and how they did it.

This is especially important for you strain-chasers out there because, for an example, there are about three Durango dispensaries selling Gorilla Glue #4 right now, but you’ll pay different prices per gram at each place. This is frustrating because shoppers will chase the lowest price thinking that all strains of Gorilla Glue #4 are the same because they share a name, which is simply false. Think about it this way: Pabst Blue Ribbon is a lager, and you can buy a thirty-pack for about $17. Samuel Adams’ Utopias is also a lager, but it costs $150 for a single bottle. Not all lagers are equal in price or quality in the same way that not all Gorilla Glue #4 strains are equal. And a few months ago, I wrote a blog on how to identify high-quality cannabis (you can read it HERE), but this week, I wanted to give you a few pointers on how to tell if the pot you’re about to smoke es no bueno. So, watch out for these three things:

1.) “PM,” or “powdery mildew.” PM looks exactly like it sounds (a white powder), and to the untrained eye, PM can look like trichomes, which are the white crystals you want on your pot. True, the state requires all flower to be tested for microbials before a batch of bud can be sold recreationally, but you’ll still find PM on recreational bud, especially if you’re buying the cheap stuff. The reason for this is that after the flower passes its microbial test, and after it’s sent to a dispensary, it can sit there for months which gives trace amounts of PM time to grow. Disclaimer: THIS NEVER HAPPENS AT THE GREENERY! We take the small-batch approach with our growing and ordering, so our flower always sells out while it’s fresh. You’re welcome.

2.) Aphids. I’m not joking: I’ve seen recreational flower sold in Colorado that’s crawling with bugs. So, look at your pot—if it’s moving, it’s no good. The state also requires that all recreational flower be tested for residual pesticides, so I guess some people might be passing that test by simply letting the bugs have free-range. Gross.

3.) Brown Leaves. When the green on flower is replaced by brown, it means one of three things happened: either the pot was burned by the fertilizers, or the grow lights, or the flower wasn’t cured properly. For the record, brown pot won’t hurt you, but if you see brown edges on the flower, it’s a likely sign that the terpene or THC content is lower than it should be. So, again, if you’re hunting around for some Gorilla Glue #4, try paying attention to the color more so than the price; it’s just good advice. I’ve written blog after blog about The Greenery Grow, but just as a reminder, you should click HERE to learn about why you’ll never have to check our flower for any of these three detractors.

The last reason you shouldn’t get stuck on a single strain because you liked it “that one time” is availability. Thanks to rampant crossbreeding, there are well over 4,000 strains of marijuana available recreationally in Colorado. So, if you were to walk into a dispensary looking for a particular strain, the chances of actually finding it are one in four thousand—statistically speaking, you have the same chances of finding your strain as you would flipping a quarter twelve times and having it land on heads each time. That doesn’t happen very often.

So, instead of walking into a shop and then turning away when they don’t have the strain you’re looking for, ask for something similar. In our Durango dispensary, we train our budtenders on how to look up a strain and its reported effects; they can also figure out your favorite strain’s lineage. We make our budtenders smoke every strain we offer (it’s a rough life) so they can become familiar with what we sell, and I promise that each budtender you’ll meet here can find you a strain that’s similar to (or better than) the strain you’re looking for. So, if you’re stuck in a rut with a favorite strain, or if you want to find the absolute best representation of your favorite strain, come see us at 208 Parker Avenue right here in Bodo Park (please bring your valid I.D. proving that you’re over 21). We’ll help you find what you’re looking for and we’ll explain why quality matters more than price or a name, because We’re Your Best Buds!

Cannabis Etiquette

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Smoking pot is a social thing. It breaks the ice, it forms bonds and friendships, it reminds us that being together is better than being apart. There’s simply something about cannabis culture that’s harmonious and gregarious, peace-loving and friendly, and that’s why I love this plant so much. Think about it: when alcohol comes to mind, so does belligerence and abandon, but when pot comes to mind, you picture calm smiles and companionship. But now that marijuana is becoming more mainstream, our culture is changing. Altria (the company that makes Marlboro cigarettes) just invested billions into cannabis, the companies that make Corona and Heineken are already producing cannabis-infused beer, and new stories of corporate acquisitions in the cannabis industry are popping up daily. Pot is becoming a business as opposed to a pleasant secret.

So, what’s that going to do? Is weed going to morph into a pedestrian thing just like all the other stuff you can buy in a corner store? Is the communal, loving culture that’s synonymous with cannabis going to change into blatant consumerism once weed is grown and sold by the same companies that pedal cigarettes? I don’t know. But I do know that the only way to preserve something wonderful is to talk about it and educate the masses—the only way to keep something communal is to discuss the way it brings us together and how to keep it that way. So, this week, I decided to write about how to smoke with other people in a way that preserves the culture that got us here in the first place. If you heed the following rules, you’ll avoid making a flower faux pas, and when you’re smoking with other people, you’ll come across as an OG who cares what pot is all about…

1.) Bring some if you’re invited. Remember, sharing is caring, and that’s what it’s all about. If a buddy invites you to a smoke session, bring some pot. Your buddy called you to be together, not just to get you high, so keep things equal by contributing.

2.) Pay back if you cannot contribute. If you don’t have anything to contribute to a smoke session, take a mental note, because I guarantee that whoever gets you high will remember it, and if you always show up emptyhanded, the invites will start to dwindle. It’s commonsense: if someone smokes you out, you should smoke him or her out.

3.) Think about the group, not yourself; doing so reinforces the sense of community that makes getting high together so wonderful. There are easy ways to do this:

4.) If you load the bowl, offer the first hit to someone else. The first hit, or the “green” hit, is always the most flavorful, so offering it to someone else is tantamount to offering a gift, and that’s exactly the type of thing that brings people together. Of course, there’s an exception to every rule: if you’re smoking a joint or blunt, and you rolled it, it’s okay to light it yourself and take the first hit (it’s the little reward that comes from taking the time to roll a joint).

5.) If someone offers you the first hit, don’t burn all the green in the bowl. Instead, apply the flame to the side of the bowl and burn only a little of the green so the next person in the circle gets some flavor, too. This is called taking a “hippy hit,” and hippies are all about love, which is important.

6.) Keep passing the pipe or joint to the left. If you’re a regular smoker, what I’m about to tell you will sound obscenely obvious, so please remember that I’m writing this for everyone. When people get together to smoke, they form a circle, and it’s important to pass the pipe to your left. Snoop Dog raps about this regularly, and other songs like “Pass the Dutchie on the Lefthand Side” keep the tradition alive, but there’s a reason for it you might not know. Most people are righthanded, so if you pass to your left, you’re putting the pipe directly into your neighbor’s dominant hand, so it’s easier for them to take the pot. True, if you pass to your right, it’s easier because you don’t have to cross your arm to your left, but remember, it’s not about you. It’s about the group, and it needs to stay that way.

7.) Don’t sober shame. Remember, smoking pot in a social setting is about being inclusive. If someone is standing in your circle, and he or she doesn’t want to smoke, don’t give that individual any crap for his or her choice. He or she belongs in the group just as much as you do because being friendly is more important than getting high. But if you’re that person who prefers to stay sober, take the pipe when it’s handed to you and then pass it along instead of holding up your hands and saying “no.” If you’re standing in a circle, don’t break it.

8.) Keep the pipe or joint moving. Let’s be honest: people are intrinsically self-centered, and we all like to be the center of attention. And when a pipe is handed to you, the entire circle’s attention will shift to you. Some people will revel in the spotlight, and they’ll stand there holding the pipe and start talking because everyone is watching. Don’t be that guy; nobody likes that guy. We’re watching you because you’re holding the pot, not because what you’re saying is so interesting. So, take a damn hit and then pass the pipe because we want it, too! If you can’t tell, this one is my personal pet peeve, and it’s usually everyone else’s as well. Holding the pipe and talking is called “camping” (because you’re making the pot stay in one place), and people will usually drop hints like, “hey, you plan on pitching a tent?” Or, they’ll tell you not to “bogart the pot,” because Humphry Bogart always had an unlit cigarette hanging out of his mouth. Don’t camp, don’t bogart, and we’ll all get along.

9.) Don’t slobber on the pipe. There are all sorts of derogatory and disgusting terms for this that I’m going to omit from this blog, but for the love of all things holy, don’t get your spit all over the pipe; there’s nothing worse than a wet hit. If you’re a fan of using too much Chapstick, or you notice that you slobbered the pipe inadvertently, wipe the mouthpiece discreetly on your shirt before passing the pipe to your left.

10.) Let the circle know if you’re sick. For real, the group’s health is more important than your high. If you’re sick, don’t smoke. Or, better yet, bring your own pipe or joint and let it be well-known as to why you’re not sharing. People will thank you for it, and it’s the kind thing to do, especially since more and more people are smoking now and quite a few of us have healthy kids at home to worry about.

11.) Don’t pass an empty bowl. There’s nothing more disappointing than trying to take a hit and not getting one, so if you take the last hit, announce to the group that the “bowl is cashed.” And if you’re contributing to the circle, go ahead and load a new bowl. In this scenario, it’s okay to take the green hit yourself so you don’t miss out on the rotation, but remember the hippy hit.

12.) Don’t “chaz the banger,” or “crust the nail.” Yeah, I gripe about pot becoming big business, but there are some benefits that stem from all the progression, such as the availability of new-school dabs. And with dabs, there comes a whole new litany of rules, but I’ll just list two of them and leave it at that. For one, when you offer someone else a dab, if you’re using your rig, it’s polite to heat the nail and apply the dab yourself while your friend hits. Doing so stresses the communal feel of getting high together, kind of like lighting someone else’s cigarette. But if you’re using someone else’s rig and dabs, the urge to get as high as possible off someone else’s stuff will kick in, and you might overheat the nail to get it as hot as possible to get a big hit: don’t do this. This move is selfish, which goes against the culture, but worse than that, it’ll “chaz” or “crust” the nail, which could make it break at worst, or make the next dab taste bad at best. Remember, think about other people.

See? There’s more to smoking pot than simply lighting it on fire and breathing in the smoke, and just about all of it has to do with getting along together as a group. It’s the keystone to our culture, and it’s important because if we don’t hang onto tradition, smoking pot could turn into something tawdry like taking a shot of cheap tequila at a dive bar. And this “culture” that I keep talking about is alive and well here in our Durango dispensary; we’ve built our business on it. We offer discounts to veterans and people with Colorado medical cards, because these people need it the most. We use living bugs in our grow to kill the bad bugs because we want to keep things as natural as possible. And we do everything we can to preserve the original, communal essence of the cannabis industry, because We’re Your Best Buds!

Connoisseur Cannabis

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Lately, I’ve noticed a shift. About a year ago, most shoppers would come in and ask for my “cheapest” cannabis, but now, people are requesting the “best.” I know this change is occurring, but I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s because people bought from illegal dealers less than half a decade ago, and back then, you got what you got, and price was the only variable. But now that there’s a wide variety of legal cannabis, maybe people are slowly starting to lean towards quality over price. Or maybe it’s because legal cannabis has made it so a new, affluent demographic of shopper is buying weed. Or better yet, maybe the consumer base is being educated by a legal cannabis industry, and they’re starting to figure out that you get what you pay for when it comes to pot, just like you do with everything else. I’m not sure. Either way, the cannabis culture is changing into something that values quality over the “let’s get high off something cheap” paradigm that ruled the world back when pot was sold in plastic bags on street corners.

And I can prove it—if you’re an uber pot-nerd and you’d like to read something proving that trends are changing, you can read a bona fide study HERE that was commissioned by the state’s Marijuana Enforcement Division to chart the changes in consumer purchasing trends. It shows exactly how the 302 metric tons (holy crap!) of cannabis that were sold in 2017 were allocated between flower and edibles and concentrates and whatnot. Granted, the study doesn’t delve into why the trends are changing, but it proves that they are.

But if you think about it, the “why” doesn’t really matter, and as an integral part of the legal cannabis community here in Colorado, it’s The Greenery’s job to take note of what consumers want and then provide it; that’s what we do. And this week, I wanted to write a post for all you connoisseurs out there and tell you about three top-end products that we’re selling for people with discerning tastes. Let’s get started…

1.) FSE Cartridges from Green Dot Labs.

Simply put, these are incredible. “FSE” stands for “full-spectrum extract,” which means that anything and everything you’ll find in the plant has made its way into these cartridges. Each of these carts is filled with 500mg of the purest, terpene-rich FSE on the market. Green Dot Labs uses in-house genetics for their carts (meaning they grow custom varietals to make the best concentrates) to provide Sativa, Indica, and Hybrid options. I never recommend this product for newbies because it gets you very high, but if you’re a connoisseur, this cartridge is for you because there honestly isn’t a better one on the planet.

2.) Boutique Flower from The Greenery Grow.

We really do grow the best pot in Durango. I’ve written about it before (for more, click HERE) because we’re so proud of our cultivation facility, but it’s all worth saying twice. We use good bugs to kill the bad bugs instead of using caustic pesticides; we pump CO2 particulates onto the fanleaves to increase photosynthesis; we use light-emitting ceramic bulbs that are better than the sun. We do everything possible to grow the highest-quality cannabis to ever grace this mountain town, so if you’re a connoisseur, it’s pointless to shop elsewhere.

3.) Artisanal Chocolate Truffles from Coda Signature.

Coda’s head chocolatier, Lauren Gockley, is one of the ten best in the nation, and I’m not just talking about chocolatiers who make cannabis edibles. This is one of those rare occasions wherein one of the best names in the culinary world decided to play her hand in the cannabis industry, and we’ve all won as a result. Coda’s chocolate can hold its own right alongside the best confections out there and it gets you high, which is a definite win-win. And the hand-painted truffles from Coda (which come in flavors like tiramisu, earl grey, passion fruit, and burnt caramel) are firmly in the connoisseur lane because they’re made from ethically-sourced chocolate, pure CO2 cannabis oil, and unrivaled artistry.

There you go. If you’re one of the discerning customers out there who values quality over thrift, you really should come into our Durango dispensary—we’re selling the best of the best, because if you’re a connoisseur, We’re Your Best Buds too!