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Marijuana for Valentine’s Day

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Marijuana for Valentine’s Day

You clicked the button saying you were over 21 to enter our site, which means it’s safe to assume we’re all adults, so I’m just going to come out and say it: you have no idea how often sex comes up in my everyday conversations with customers. They’ll lean in across the counter and give me an embarrassed look before saying something like, “so, which strain is good for… you know what?” and after a couple years behind the counter, trust me, yes, I “know what.” That being said, it’s a difficult question to answer because everyone is so different, so what works for someone per “you know what” might not work for someone else, and oddly enough, I’ve found that gender plays a huge role.

Now, I’m about to make a few generalizations, but please don’t think I subscribe to stereotypes—it’s just that the feedback I’ve received from customers supports what I’m about to say, so don’t judge me. Here it is: when it comes to cannabis for sex, I’ve found that women prefer indica strains as where men prefer the sativa designation. I’m sure that sounds weird, but if you think about it, it makes sense. Sativa strains are known for the energetic vigor they can give smokers, which is exactly what dudes are looking for, but sativa strains can also get in your head and make you feel a bit self-conscious, which is the last thing a woman wants during intimacy. And when it comes to indica strains, the soothing body high is enticing to the ladies, but the deflating relaxation is a bit scary for the dudes. See what I mean?

But really, I’ve gotten off track. The real reason I started writing this is that a customer came in this morning and asked if we had any upcoming Valentine’s Day specials, and the gentleman who came in right afterwards asked for suggestions per which marijuana products he should put in his wife’s Valentine’s Day gift basket. So, I figured I’d answer both questions in a blog just in case a few of you might have the same questions, but I wanted to first answer the “you know what” question in writing in case you’ve been too embarrassed to ask, and because it’s apropos given the meaning behind Valentine’s Day. But I digress; I’ll get back on track.

Let’s start with the Valentine’s Day specials: starting Friday, 2/14, and ending Sunday, 2/16, we’re offering a 25% discount on all Sweet CO2 products in our Durango dispensary. This means you can save 25% on CO2 oil vape cartridges, 1g CO2 oil syringes, and CBD capsules throughout the Valentine’s Day weekend. It’s a Sweet deal; get it?

Also starting on Valentine’s Day is a 25% discount on Binske gummies, making these 100mg THC gummies $18 out the door. Plus, they come in a fancy reusable tin. This deal runs through February 28th.

And there’s more. Since Valentine’s Day is on a Friday, if you spend $50 before tax, you can pick up a 1g joint for $1. And our monthly specials are good on Valentine’s Day as well, so you can still take advantage of our “buy one, get one half-off” deal on Altus Tablets, and you can still take 30% off Aliviar lotion, just in case you’d like to give your partner a foot rub with cannabis-infused lotion on the special day.

There. That answers the first question I got today, so, now onto the “which cannabis products would make a good Valentine’s day gift for my wife?” question. And yes, I’m going to focus on what to buy for women, not for men, because men are easy: buy them something that’ll get them high, and you’ll be good to go. But women? That’s a little trickier. I mean, if you got your lady friend a gram of shatter for Valentine’s Day, yeah, she might like it if she’s the dabbing type, but most women I know would think you phoned in your gift selection, so you’ll need to try harder. But please don’t second guess your decision to shop for your partner at a dispensary, because I promise it can be romantic, and I promise that a huge percentage of the women out there would prefer our marijuana flower over flowers, so you’ve come to the right place. And to take the guesswork out of the equation, I went ahead and came up with five gift ideas that are sure to please (you’re welcome). Here you go.

The best marijuana gifts for Valentine’s Day.

1.) Foria Pleasure

It’s always a bit awkward to answer the “what is Foria?” question when it pops up in our dispensary after someone sees it sitting on the shelf, so I’m glad I get to do it in writing: Foria is a THC-infused “arousal oil” that’s formulated for women. This is taken directly from Foria’s website, so these are their words not mine, but it’s said that Pleasure “enhances tactile sensations while decreasing tension, discomfort, and dryness,” so it’s obvious why the Foria Pleasure would fit well in a Valentine’s Day gift basket.

2.) 1906 Love Beans

These are dark chocolate covered coffee beans, and they’re awesome. Granted, the caffeine might keep you up a night, but who knows? Maybe that’s what you’re looking for on Valentine’s Day. Anyway, each Love Bean delivers 5mg THC/CBD that’s water-soluble for rapid absorption, but more importantly, these beans are infused with four different “plant medicines;” that’s where the “Love” comes from. The plant medicines are Damiana, Muira Puma Catuba, Ashwagandha, and Theobromine. Now I can’t cite any peer-reviewed studies to prove the effects of these additives, so please take this with a grain of salt, but these compounds are supposed to increase everything from stamina to libido, which goes hand-in-hand with the gift above, so our Valentine’s Day basket is off to a good start.

3.) Mary Jane’s Massage Oil

If I have to tell you why massage oil would make a good valentine’s Day gift, you’re probably hopeless, so I won’t get into that. But this stuff is wonderful—the oil itself is perfect for massages, and it’s packed with tons of THC and CBD for a little something extra. This one is a no-brainer.

4.) Coda Signature Truffles

I know it’s a cliché to give your Valentine a box of chocolates, but what about a box of chocolates that gets you high? That’s next level, and you could even put a new twist on the “flowers and chocolates” motif by gifting marijuana “flower” and these chocolates. Fun, right? And the flavors available in these hand-painted truffles are insane: Juniper and Lemon, Burnt Caramel, Earl Grey and Honey, Hazelnut, Passion Fruit, and Tiramisu.

5.) Blue Dream Flower

And if you’re looking for the “flower” portion of the aforementioned “flowers and chocolates” theme, I’d go with Blue Dream—we grow it and sell it, and ours is the best. Remember what I said about men and women versus sativa or indica? Well, Blue Dream is a perfect hybrid; it lives in the goldilocks zone in between the two designations. It’s relaxing for the ladies, but not too much for the guys—it’s stimulating for the gentlemen, but not too thought-inducing for the gals. And frankly, it’s better to buy one strain for both partners instead of one for each, because smoking together before you “get together” is less isolating than smoking different strains apart. Know what I mean?

And that’s that! Please come see us at 208 Parker Avenue for that perfect cannabis-related Valentine’s Day gift (and if you’re single and you’d rather spend the special day high than sober, you should come see us, too). Either way, we’ll have plenty of specials and perfect gifts for your day of love, because We’re Your Best Buds!

Foria

Foria, Foria Pleausre, Foria Relief

There’s no such thing as a comfortable conversation about suppositories. Well, not usually, anyway, but you and I are going to have one right now; the buffering shield of anonymity protects us both from embarrassment. And for the record, I know you clicked the “yes, I’m twenty-one” tab to enter this site, so we’re going to talk about this like grownups. Anyway, here we go…

The Greenery is now offering two new marijuana infused products, both of which are produced by Foria, specifically “Pleasure” and “Relief.” The first comes in a 5 milliliter spray bottle that delivers 2.5 milligrams per application—here comes the adult part: the suggested use is to spray one dose “directly onto the clitoris, inner and outer labia, and inside the vagina.” You’ll need to allow up to fifteen minutes for Pleasure to take effect, and this product isn’t approved for use with latex condoms, but other than that, there’s not much you need to know. Women who’ve used this product say that Pleasure enables better, multiple orgasms that’re easier to access, and that Pleasure may help with improved, natural lubrication. Of course, since this product delivers THC, it may also bring with it the classical effects associated with marijuana: deep-body relaxation, a sound night’s sleep, and for some, a slight high. And if you think about it, a product like this makes sense. Cannabis products have been known to increase blood flow, and that’s the main prerequisite for sexual pleasure. The Greenery is offering Pleasure for $25 before tax per bottle, and if you’d like more information, just go to www.foriapleasure.com.

See? We made it through that wonderfully. Neither one of us giggled, which proves that we’re mature enough to move on to the vaginal suppository.

Look, I know that last sentence ended with a jarring pair of words, but it is what it is, and this product might bring some real relief to women who need it, so it’s worth discussion. And Foria’s Relief  is all over the internet, so much so that it has earned the somewhat misleading nickname of “weed tampon,” so it’s important that we dispel any of the misconceptions associated with this product before you walk in our door; Relief is in fact not a tampon. Also, these posts are pretty short, so after you’ve read what we have to say about it, we’d recommend going to Relief’s FAQ page here for further information.

In short, each package of Relief (which we’re selling for $25 before tax) includes two suppositories; each one contains 10 milligrams of THC and 60 milligrams of CBD. Women who’ve tried this product have reported “a significant decrease in the pain and discomfort often associated with menstruation,” per Foria’s testimonies. The THC may help via the nervous system by blocking pain signals and boosting pleasure, and the CBD may help with inflammation and cramps. Also, given the 10 milligrams of THC per dose, it’s possible that users might experience a high, but Foria has this product listed as “non-psychoactive,” so results may vary. The science makes sense, and the only other ingredient in each suppository is organic cocoa butter, so we at The Greenery think that Relief is a worthy addition to our menu, but it’s always prudent to consult your physician before trying a product such as Relief.

And that’s it; we’re done. I typed out five-hundred words that’d make me blush and break eye-contact in the real world, and you sat where you’re sitting and read about The Greenery’s newest products in privacy. However, I know that reading about a product and actually buying it are two completely different things; you might still harbor a touch of trepidation about coming into our store and ordering one of these products from a stranger with a straight face. So, I have a suggestion: use our convenient call-ahead service. Just give us a shout at (970) 403-3710 and tell us what you’d like to try. We’ll put some Pleasure in a white paper bag, or some Relief, if you’d prefer, and we’ll set aside your order discreetly—we’ll write your first name on the bag, and nothing more. Tell us your name when you come in, we’ll ring up your order without making a big deal out if it, and then you can go on your way comfortably.

Or, if this is how you roll, just come in, walk up to the register, and tell us what you want loud and proud. Ask us questions, if you have any after reading this, and we’ll answer them accurately and seriously. After all, we’re profesionals, and that’s how we’ll treat you, because that’s what you’ve come to expect from your best buds.

-The Greenery

Floria Pleasure, The Greenery, Recreational Marijuana  Foria Relief, The Greenery