edibles Archives | Page 4 of 5 | The Grand Junction Greenery

Posted on December 1, 2018 - 9:00 am

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We’ve all been there, me included. I’ve found myself under the covers in a little ball after too many edibles; I’ve been out with friends after a dab too many thinking that the world was out to get me. Everyone I know has a “dude, I got way too high this one time” story because it’s difficult to find that perfect high without crossing the line at least once (one of my coworkers ended up in a tree). And yes, when it comes to cannabis, moderation is the key just like it is with everything else, but that’s the kind of platitude that doesn’t do anything after the fact. So, this week, I figured it’d be a good idea to give you a few tips on what to do if you have one hit or one cookie too many; here we go…

1.) Don’t panic, because that just makes the experience worse. Remember, cannabis is comparably safe—after all, you can overdose on water and die if you drink too much, but even a ludicrous amount of pot won’t kill you. If you get too high, simply remind yourself that everything is going to be okay and breathe deeply.

2.) Eat. You get munchies after smoking for a reason (your body knows what it needs), and if you get too high, I’d recommend giving into the urge to stuff your face. Just like with other intoxicants, I’ve found that a belly-full of food takes off the edge. And please take this with a grain of salt, but Neil Young swears that black pepper takes away some of the high, or at least the anxiety, so try seasoning your food liberally if you’re eating to combat a high.

3.) Drink water. Frankly, this is good advice even if you’re not too high, but water helps to flush everything out of your system, not just THC, so stay hydrated!

4.) Try taking some CBD. I wrote an entire blog about marijuana myths that you can read HERE because a lot of people think that CBD cancels out a THC high, but it doesn’t. If you take CBD in concert with THC, it adds something to the high rather than taking away from it, but the calming effects of CBD can definitely take the edge off; this is the stoner’s version of “hair of the dog.”

5.) Take a bath. There’s something about hot water that seems to fix everything, and it’s no different when it comes to cannabis. If you get too high, try taking a hot bath or a long shower. Worst case scenario, you’ll be too high in the shower, which is way better than being out in public with all the crazies.

6.) Find something to do. Most of the symptoms associated with an extreme high are in your head (just like the rest of life’s harmless nonsense), so if you distract yourself with a movie (“The Princess Bride” is my recommendation), you’ll be able to think about something else until sobriety comes your way.

7.) Exercise. The cannabinoids in your system are metabolized just like anything else you take in to your body, so if you want to get through it more quickly, go for a brisk walk—you’ll burn calories while sobering up, which is a win-win. Of course, there’s another side to this coin: if you want to hold onto your high because it’s just right, sit on the couch and enjoy the ride.

8.) Find a friend. Most of the issues that stem from an insane high are psychological, so if you get paranoid and anxious, call a friend (if they get annoyed, blame it on me). Having someone to talk you down and soothe the insanity can really help. Hell, if you don’t have a friend, give us a call at (970) 403-3710 and one of our budtenders will chat with you.

And that’s that. As I said in the beginning, it’s best to not to overindulge in the first place. Actually, it was Benjamin Franklin who said, “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure,” but that axiom might not relate to our industry because an ounce of anything we sell would definitely be too much of a good thing. But what makes our Durango dispensary different is the fact that we’ll actually tell you to take it easy when you’re shopping here as opposed to selling you as much pot as possible. We’ve trained our budtenders to explain edible serving sizes, and the THC percentage associated with every strain we sell is listed clearly, so you’ll never end up with something more potent than you can handle. The pleasant experience you have with the products we sell is just as important to us as the experience you have while you’re in our store, because after all, We’re Your Best Buds!

Marijuana Myths

Posted on November 24, 2018 - 3:11 pm

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I want to say this outright: CBD does not cancel the high that comes from THC. At least once a day, one of my customers will tell me that they don’t want anything with CBD in it because it “takes away the high,” and at this point, I’m thinking about making a sign that says “no it doesn’t” so I can hold it up for emphasis.

Frankly, the marijuana myth that “CBD cancels THC” is Denver’s fault. It’s part of my job to travel this state and sell products from The Greenery Hash Factory to the other 549 dispensaries in Colorado, and in Denver, just about every shop has a cooler up front that’s filled with CBD water. The budtenders there try to upsell CBD water to customers by saying that “if you have too many edibles and you want to come down, just drink some CBD water,” and doing so has perpetuated this myth to the point wherein the rest of us who know what we’re talking about have to tell people the truth on a daily basis.

Let me give you some proof: we sell a 1:1 single-serving honey packet, meaning that if you eat all the honey, you get 10mg THC and 10mg CBD. If the cancellation myth were true, the 10mg CBD would cancel out the 10mg THC, and this honey would be pointless. But last Father’s Day, I put one of these honey packets in my morning coffee and I got high enough to watch “Keeping Up with the Kardashians” with my daughter, which should tell you something about the honey’s effect…

Next myth: “marijuana is a gateway drug.” Frankly, this is the most asinine myth out there and I start twitching whenever I hear someone say it. Did you know that alcohol is a drug? And did you know that I’ve never met anyone who tried pot before trying alcohol? Do you see what I’m getting at? Alcohol is the gateway drug. Yes, people who smoke cannabis are statistically more likely to try hard drugs later in life, but just about every single one of these people tried alcohol first, ergo, marijuana was tried after they’d already gone through the “gateway.” Get it? And alcohol is dangerous as where pot is not. If you don’t believe me, do some external research: google “number of alcohol-related deaths in America,” and then google “number of marijuana-deaths in America,” and then draw your own conclusions.

Myth number three: “marijuana prohibition protects children.” Seriously, there are people out there who still believe this, even though legal dispensaries are putting street-corner drug dealers out of business, and we check driver’s licenses to make sure our customers are over twenty-one, as where the illegal guys do not. But this myth is by far the easiest to disprove thanks to math: it has been proven statistically that teens who live in legal states like Colorado don’t smoke more than teens who live in states with prohibition (click HERE for proof). And it’s been proven that the number of teens who smoke cannabis in Colorado has actually decreased since we legalized marijuana (click HERE if you don’t believe me). Myths lie, numbers do not.

Lastly, I know it might sound like I wrote this because marijuana myths are personally annoying, but I didn’t—I wrote this because giving accurate information is one of the cornerstones upon which our Durango dispensary is founded. To us, truth and facts matter, and we strive to be honest with all our customers because it’s part of our brand. So, if you have questions about anything cannabis-related of if you’ve heard a few myths you’d like to fact check, give us a call at (970) 403-3710 and we’ll set you straight. Or better yet, if you’re over twenty-one with a valid I.D. proving as much, come see us at 208 Parker Avenue right here in Bodo Park. We’ll take our time to dispel any of the myths you might’ve heard, because We’re Your best Buds, and that’s what we do!

Water-Soluble vs. Lipid-Soluble THC

Posted on November 17, 2018 - 9:00 am

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I know this blog has a dry title, but this is important stuff, so hang in there; I promise you’ll learn something new. Let’s get started…

When most edibles are made, they’re infused with a distilled oil because it checks most of the boxes: it doesn’t taste too much like pot, it’s potent, and it’s easy to infuse with foods. But the box it doesn’t check deals with how long it takes for the high to kick in—it can take up to two hours, so an edible high is something for which you need to plan. The reason? Distillates are oils, and oils are lipid-soluble, meaning the THC needs to bind with fats which are then processed in your liver, and that takes time.

And that “time” time has always bothered me, just as it bothered Justin Singer, who is one of the founders of “Ripple,” an infused edibles manufacturer that supplies The Greenery with products. But Singer did something about it when it bothered him (instead of complaining like I do) and he invented a water-soluble form of THC distillate. With this new form of concentrate, the THC doesn’t need to bind with fats and be processed in the liver: it gets into your system via absorption as soon as you eat it, and it does so in three different places: sublingually (under your tongue), intestinally, and hepatically (in your liver). It’s all thanks to osmosis, which is a property of water-soluble compounds that allows them to permeate the semipermeable membranes in your body—the science is fun, but all you really need to know is that edibles made with Ripple can take effect after twenty or thirty minutes, which is awesome.

Secondly, believe it or not, Singer was thinking about his grandmother when he invented Ripple because she wanted the relief that can come from cannabinoids, but she didn’t want the sugar that’s inherent to most of the sweet edibles on the market. And as such, when Singer invented Ripple, he made it sugar-free—not only will Ripple products kick in sooner, they’re compatible with low-glycemic diets. Cool, right? And this is important because people over fifty make up the fastest-growing demographic of cannabis consumers (click HERE for a corroborating article), and sugar content is important to these individuals for obvious reasons. Let’s get into the specific Ripple products you can find in our Durango dispensary:

1.) Ripple Pure 10. This product sells for $29 out-the-door, and each bottle contains 10 packets (10mg THC each, for a total of 100mg THC per bottle) of tasteless, odorless, instantly-dissolvable powder that can be added to any drink or food to turn it into a cannabis-infused edible. You can put it in water or juice (or spaghetti sauce, for that matter), so the versatility of this product is unparalleled.

2.) Ripple Balanced 5. The pricing and usage of this product is similar to the Pure 10, but each packet in this product contains a powder that delivers 5mg THC and 5mg CBD for consumers who are looking for the high of THC and the medicinal properties of CBD all in one place.

3.) Ripple relief 20:1. Again, the price and usage are the same for this product as with the last two, but each of these packets delivers 10mg CBD and 0.5mg THC for consumers who are looking for the benefits of CBD without the high of THC. Seriously, Singer covered all the bases when he rolled out Ripple.

Now, that’s all dandy, but what about those of us who like sweet edibles? Face it: sometimes gummies are fun, and if you don’t want to mess around with powders and liquids, but you still want a fast-acting edible, Ripple has you covered with these three products:

1.) Stillwater Blood Orange Gummies. This product sells for $24 out-the-door, and it contains 20, 5mg THC gummies for a total of 100mg THC per container. Thanks to these delicious gummies, we have a bona fide fast-acting edible on our shelves. And this product is doubly awesome because with most gummies, you get 10mg servings instead of 5mg servings, so you can control your serving size much more accurately with this product.

2.) Stillwater Green Tea Mango Gummies. This product is $24 after tax as well, and you still get 20 gummies per container, but each serving delivers 2.5mg THC and 2.5mg CBD for the balance quite a few people ask for when they come into our dispensary.

3.) Stillwater Honey Lavender Gummies. This product is also $24 OTD and it contains 20 servings as well, but each gummy delivers 5mg CBD and 0.25mg THC for the high-free CBD experience for which medicinal shoppers are looking.

CBD Oil in Durango

Posted on October 6, 2018 - 9:00 am

Without exaggeration, about thirty people come in every day and ask, “do you have any CBD oil?” Of course, when I get this question, I always say, “yes, we do; are you looking for smokable or edible oil?” This question is usually answered with a blank look because most people don’t know the difference, and if you think about it, it’s my fault. I’ve been writing about cannabis laws and history because it’s such a hot topic right now, but my choice to do so has left those of you looking for CBD oil in the lurch, so this week, I’m going to make up for it and tell you everything you need to know about the CBD oil we sell in our Durango dispensary.

However, before we get started, I need to include two caveats: I’m not a doctor, and neither is anyone who works at The Greenery. We aren’t qualified to give medical advice, and all I can do is share my personal experience with the products I’m about to discuss, or the experience many of our customers have had. It’s always advisable to consult your physician before using CBD (or THC, for that matter) to treat a medical issue, so please keep that in mind. And for the second disclaimer, even though we’re talking about CBD products, everything we sell in this dispensary contains a small amount of THC, so even though many of these products might not get you “high,” they can show up on a drug test. Now, let’s get started:

There are two forms of CBD oil: smokable, and edible. It’s easy to decide which form will work best for you depending on the effects you wish to feel. For example, if you’re looking for a product that can bring with it quick effect, try smoking your CBD Oil. The effects of smokable products kick in almost immediately, as where an edible can take up to two hours to take effect. However, if you’re looking for lasting effects, try an edible. Like I said, edibles take a while to kick in, but once they do, they can last for between four and six hours.

Now that we have that covered, let’s get into the four different ways you can get your CBD here at The Greenery (the last two will be the “oils” I get asked about daily).

1.) Flower. That’s right, you can buy actual marijuana that’s high in CBD. We usually have two strains available (CBD Mango Haze for the Sativa lovers, and Raspberry Glue for those of you who prefer Indica-dominant strains). And we sell Toast as well, which is a brand that produces pre-rolls that look like cigarettes—each “slice” contains a little more than a half-gram of high CBD flower, and quite a few people love these things. Flower is the purest way to get your CBD because the bud is unprocessed, but there will always be a slight high because this type of flower contains THC as well, and smoking bud isn’t as discrete as the other CBD options.

2.) Edibles. We have peach gummies that deliver 20mg CBD and 2mg THC per serving, and this is a perfect option for those of you who want to take regular servings of CBD with a lasting effect. And we have dark cherry chocolate bars that’ll deliver 25mg CBD and 2.5mg THC for you chocolate-lovers out there. We also sell Ripple Relief, which is a tasteless, odorless, instantly-dissolvable powder you can add to any drink which will give you 10mg CBD and 0.5mg THC per serving—this product is simple, consistent, and as discrete as they come. For a low serving of CBD, we offer Stillwater CBD Gummies in a Honey Lavender flavor with 5mg CBD and 0.25mg of THC per serving and a Green Tea Mango flavor with 2.5mg of each CBD and THC per serving.

3.) Tinctures. This is the “edible oil” most people are looking for, but the term is somewhat misleading because this product isn’t an oil—it’s a tincture that’s infused with oil that you put under your tongue. And the longer you hold it under your tongue before swallowing, the sooner a tincture might take effect (that’s because it’s absorbed intravenously while it’s under your tongue). We have a wide assortment of tinctures, but this week, I’m going to tell you only about the Lucky Turtle Restore Tincture. Each bottle has over 600mg CBD and only 9mg THC, so each serving (dropper-full) will deliver roughly 17mg CBD and 0.25mg THC, so you get all the goodness of CBD without the buzz of THC. We sell this tincture in either Lemon or Watermelon, and there isn’t a better cannabis tincture on the market in my opinion.

4.) Vape Oil. And this is the “smokable oil” I promised to tell you about, the kind you’ll want to try if you’re looking for an immediate effect. Granted, we have about twenty different forms of vaporizable oil from five different producers, but I’m going to focus on two since this is a post about CBD: the CBD oil from Sweet, and the CBD Distillate from Evolab. Both products come in low per the THC percentage (between 8% and 16%), so there’s still a slight high, but both products come in very high per the CBD (between 55% and 65%). If you do the math, that’s well over 500mg of CBD per gram, and numbers like that are going to be hard to beat. We sell this stuff in one-gram syringes or pre-loaded vape cartridges, so we have it all covered.

And that’s that! For further reading, you can learn about CBD and the entourage effect HERE, and you can learn about the endocannabinoid system HERE if you’re interested in how all of this works. But if you’re not into reading, please call us and ask questions. Anyone who answers the phone here has been educated in CBD and the products that contain it, and there’s nothing wrong with giving us a shout before you come in at (970) 403-3710. Of course, talking to someone in person is always better than calling or reading because we’ll let you see and hold all the CBD products we sell at our Durango dispensary if you’re the visual-learner type. So, come see us at 208 Parker Avenue right here in Bodo Park if you’re over twenty-one with a valid I.D., and we’ll answer all your questions face-to-face, because We’re Your Best Buds!

August’s Best Bud of the Month

Posted on August 21, 2018 - 2:56 pm

Kevin Grady
Budtender, Product Research Team Member

About your Best Bud:

Kevin is everybody’s friend. Seriously. Everyone who comes in here gives him a warm hello or a wave as if he’s Norm from Cheers; Kevin is the only budtender I know who has groupies. And that makes sense because he’s the salty bartender type who’s quick with a joke or an anecdote to turn frowns upside-down. But he has a serious, knowledgeable side as well, and he knows his stuff when it comes to cannabis, which is why he earned a spot on our Product Research Team. When Kevin isn’t selling cannabis, he’s researching it, spending his time reading about every product on the market to make sure The Greenery sells the best of the best. That’s why this week, you get to meet him (unless, of course, you’re like everyone else who already knows Kevin):

Q. When did you start working for The Greenery?
Kevin. “March 27^th of this year, I believe.”

Q. What’s your favorite way to enjoy marijuana?
Kevin. “A bubbler or a bong; a little water action. I like Green Crack and Golden Goat, or any sativa from The Greenery Grow, and I like very strong indica dabs.”

Q. What’s your favorite outdoor activity?
Kevin. “Outdoor? Hiking and biking, but mostly because I haven’t owned a car for five years. In the wintertime, I like hockey and snowboarding.”

Q. Tell us about your pet.
Kevin. “I’m the only person in Durango without a pet.”

Q. Which station do you stream while you’re working at The Greenery?
Kevin. “My favorite is Gogol Bordello, but I’m always into Ska and Punk depending on the time of day and customers.”

Q. What do you like most about working at The Greenery?
Kevin. “I like helping customers because I truly believe in cannabis.”

Due to this dedication to research and customer care (and thanks to his groupies), Kevin Grady is your Best Bud of the Month for August. Thank you so much, and congratulations, Kevin!

Weed and Romance

Posted on February 10, 2018 - 9:00 am

I have a Valentine’s Day story for you:

Nigel was a seabird who lived in New Zealand. He was a gannet, one of those streamlined white birds that looks like a seagull on steroids, and he was a hopeless romantic.

A couple decades ago, conservationists peppered a New Zealand beach with concrete decoys that looked just like Nigel, and when he flew by five years ago, he saw one that appeared particularly becoming. He landed, introduced himself to the decoy, built her a nest, and waited patiently for his stone-cold mate to lay an egg. The conservationists were ecstatic because they’d finally found success: gannets were eradicated from that beach years ago, and the concrete decoys were meant to lure in live birds; loudspeakers were even used to play gannet mating calls on loop.

But Nigel was the only bird who landed. No real birds came to live in his nest or give him an egg that might hatch. So, Nigel flew away, and the conservationists went home to wait for another season. And when it came, so did Nigel. He landed once more and made his way through the gamut of stone decoys, looking for his special lady, and when he found her, he reintroduced himself, built her a nest, and waited once more for his statuesque mate to lay an egg. She never did, so Nigel flew away again, gliding over the surf with still wings like seabirds do.

This went on for five years. Nigel would land and look, introduce and build. He’d even preen his girlfriend’s feathers, doing his best to remove the dirt that’d accumulated on his sedentary best friend. You see, gannets mate for life, staying true to just one bird forever because that’s the way it works best for them, so Nigel wooed the same concrete bird for five years fruitlessly, right up until the day he died in that lonely nest, a few weeks ago.

At this point, what I just gave you probably doesn’t feel too much like a Valentine’s Day story, but frankly, it’s genius because it works for all of us. For those of us in committed relationships, Nigel is a mascot, someone we should all try to emulate, no matter how hard it might be to love the bird we chose. And for those of us who are lonely and single on this very pink and cuddly holiday, Nigel is a reminder that it could always be worse, because at least you’re not building nests for a rock. See what I mean? And the best part is that none of this is fictional—if you don’t believe me, you can watch Nigel’s struggle here.

And do you know what else works for all of us? Marijuana. For real. It makes bad dates better and good dates the best. It makes loneliness more bearable and partnership more companionable. And it makes the best Valentine’s Day gift ever, regardless of which side of the spectrum you’re on, because flowers and cordiform boxes got old a while ago. Seriously, how many points would you score with him or her if you showed up with a bouquet of flower, instead of flowers? And if you don’t have a him or a her, wouldn’t a bunch of bud just for yourself make the day a bit better? Probably.

So come in and see us. We still have plenty of reloadable gift cards, which are infinitely more practical than my marijuana bouquet idea, and we still have a little Foria Pleasure left that we’re selling at 20% off while supplies last. And best of all, we’re having a Valentine’s Day special on all our infused chocolates (20% off), so even if you’re a traditionalist who goes the heart-shaped-box-route, at least you’ll be able to fill it with something better than all that hazelnut nonsense that just gets picked through anyway. See what I mean when I say We’re Your Best Buds?!

Wake ‘n Bake

Posted on January 6, 2018 - 9:00 am

Do you remember the Shake ‘n Bake commercials from the early nineties? If not, they were campy and ridiculous and awesome. A woman with a rabid smile would throw some raw chicken into a zip-lock bag full of Shake ‘N Bake and shake it maniacally, maintaining her insane smile throughout, and then she’d serve her stereotypical family while they cheered as if they were eating something other than crappy chicken made with a zip-lock bag. The screen would fade to black, and then boom! The “Shake ‘N Bake” logo would appear with an unforgettable jingle… I might be scarred for life. But that doesn’t matter, because “shake ‘n bake” became a part of our collective lexicon thanks to the affective advertising.

Flash forward to a few years later, and we stoners co-opted the term and changed it a bit to come up with “wake ‘n bake,” which is how we refer to smoking pot first thing in the morning. Seriously, there’s no better way to start a Saturday. I like to wake up, stretch, smoke, and then play with the kids, laughing into the early afternoon while cartoons play in the background; it’s the type of morning found at the end of a rainbow. Actually, that’s pretty much exactly how last Saturday went, but I didn’t smoke—I took the edible route, and it got me thinking that you, the ever-intrepid marijuana blog reader, might not know about all the wonderful wake ‘n bake options we have at The Greenery. So, this week, I decided to write about six products we sell that’re pretty much made for mornings because they’re discrete, effective, and easy to use. And here we go…

1.) Clockwork Coffee: Yeah, that’s right, we’re now selling instant, marijuana-infused coffee at The Greenery, and it’s awesome. It’s like a mad scientist sat down to combine THC and caffeine (arguably the two best substances on earth) and nailed it. Each serving contains 10 milligrams of THC, and this stuff stays true to its slogan: “more wakey, less shaky.” We also carry a balanced version containing five milligrams of THC and five milligrams of CBD, so if you’re looking for a little relief with your wake ‘n bake, this is the way to go.

2.) Dixie Awakening Mints: These are perfect for the lightweight wake ‘n bakers out there because each mint contains five milligrams of THC instead of the usual ten. Our Awakening Mints are perfect for the morning because they contain orange-peel zest, ginseng, Ginko leaf, and Matcha tea powder—if these don’t pick you up, you’re probably a zombie.

3.) Magic Buzz Energy Shots: This one might be my favorite. Each single-serving energy drink contains ten milligrams of THC, and these little bottles are bolstered with caffeine, taurine, and a bunch of vitamin B. We keep these chilled in our dispensary, so we sell them cold, and the “tropical blast” flavor pairs perfectly with any breakfast.

4.) Buzz Infused Honey: Never mind, this one is my favorite. Last Fathers’ Day, my wife put a packet of this in my morning coffee, and things got peachy real quick. Each single serving contains ten milligrams of THC and ten milligrams of CBD, and as far as versatile edibles go that can be used with just about anything, honey is hard to beat.

5.) Whitewater Gentle Green Tea. Morning people come in two types: tea drinkers and coffee drinkers, and we wouldn’t dare forget about the former group. Each single serving of this lightly-caffeinated green tea contains ten milligrams of THC. You just drop one of the infused teabags into a hot cup of water, let it steep for about five minutes, and then sip your way into a better day. It’s just good stuff.

6.) Lucid Mood Energy Sipper. As far as disposable vape pens go, this one’s a damn good deal. Each preloaded, disposable vape pen (or “sipper,” as Lucid Mood calls them) comes complete with two-hundred milligrams of hash oil that’s around 40% THC, 40% CBD, and 20% aromatherapy terpenes. The Energy sipper is infused with citrus botanicals, and I swear these things make the daytime brighter.

Fun, right? Here a The Greenery, we have the best assortment of marijuana edibles on the planet—we’ve spent years eating everything on the market and picking only the best for our menu—and if you come in to talk to one of our affable budtenders, he or she can steer you towards the best wake ‘n bake ever. After all, We’re Your Best Buds, and your morning high matters to us!

Marijuana Gift Baskets

Posted on November 25, 2017 - 9:00 am

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I have the same first name as my brother-in-law. I’ve known him for most of my life—we grew up together in a rather remote part of Alaska, friends long before we became family—and we’ve always shared that strange rivalry that lives between two people with the same first name. He calls me “#2,” in a spot-on Dr. Evil voice, and I call him a whole litany of things that’re much worse. And in another odd little twist of coincidence, we’re both in the marijuana industry: my brother-in-law is a hipster who grows medical marijuana legally in the forests of California (wrongly thinking that his pot is the best), and I sell the stuff just as legally here in Colorado, when I’m not sitting behind this keyboard writing about it.

However, I don’t see my brother-in-law that often because his job isn’t as easy as it sounds, and I’m mired in the mountains of Colorado by all the stuff that makes me an adult. So, when we get together, it’s usually over the holidays. And when we give gifts, they’re usually marijuana-related (I’m sure you saw that one coming). If I go there, he gives me more pot than a person can handle, but that’s understandable given that he has a whole terraced mountainside to play with. And when he comes here, I sit him down at my dining room table and spread in front of him a panoply of pot and paraphernalia. I give him edibles and concentrates and the best marijuana in Durango, and we frolic through it virtually, getting high throughout the holidays.

For the record, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with using marijuana to celebrate the holidays. Alcohol usually gets all the attention thanks to hot-buttered rums and spiced wines and eggnog that’ll blur your vision, but that stuff just fills you up and slows you down, and one drink too many will put the “regret” in “season’s greetings” (it’s in there, I think). That’s why I like getting high instead. I like the way the Christmas lights sparkle and multiply with a head full of sativa haze; I like the way decadent food tastes richer during a deep Indica body high; I like the way a houseful of relatives becomes bearable thanks to any sort of marijuana. And above all else, I love the fact that gifting marijuana for the holidays is legal.

But it hasn’t always been this way. I’ve known my brother-in-law for nearly three decades, but we’ve only shared a few years of legal gift giving. Once upon a time, I’d have to give him pot the old-fashioned way, lowkey while the older relatives were snoring on the couch, too stuffed to notice. We’d have to smoke it outside in the cold Alaskan harshness, and then we’d sneak inside, hoping that grandma’s potpourri would cover the smell of our pot. However, none of that matters now, because pot is perfectly legal. If you feel like it, you can stuff stockings with cannabis, wrap boxes full of bud, or put your mom’s bourbon balls to shame with a box full of infused turtle brownies. These are wonderful times.

And this year, I’m stepping things up a little bit when my brother-in-law comes to town, because at The Greenery, we’re selling marijuana gift sets all throughout the holiday season. Yeah, that’s right, you can now walk into a dispensary and get a gift bag that’ll be appreciated for sure, because marijuana will make merry any Krampus, and it’s the one gift you’ll give this year that you know for a fact won’t be returned (and not just because it isn’t legal to do so). Anyway, we’re offering seven different gift sets, and here’s the breakdown:

1.) Flower Flight. Just like a flight of craft microbrews, this set runs the gamut. It includes 1 gram of CBD rich marijuana (like our CBD Mango Haze, which is just as festive as it sounds), 1 gram of our house-made Caviar, and 3 grams of your choice. This set will run you between $78.58 and $82.86 before tax, depending on flower choice.

2.) Sativa Flower Flight. Remember, Sativa is the strain that gives you energy, and this set would be perfect for Christmas morning. It’ll run you between $57 and $63 before tax depending on your selections, and you’ll get 4 different grams of the best Sativa flower on the planet.

3.) Indica Flower Flight. This one is the antithesis of number two, but for the same price, you’ll get four grams of deeply relaxing Indica, all bagged up and ready to give to that certain someone who needs to chill the hell out for the holidays.

4.) Sleep Gift Set. This one is $85.20 after tax, and it includes 1 LucidMood Sleep (which is an awesome, preloaded vape pen), 1 Magic Buzz Sleep (a single-serving infused drink with melatonin), 1 Indica MarQaha Tincture, and 1 Indica pre-rolled joint (which contains 1 gram of nighttime flower).

5.) Relax Gift Set. This one is $78 after tax, and it includes 1 LucidMood Relax, 1 single-serving infused hot chocolate with marshmallows, 1 box of Dixie Relaxing Mints, and 1 Indica pre-rolled joint.

6.) Party Gift Set. For $86.40 after tax, you’ll get a two-pack of Toast slices, 1 sucker (the flavor is up to you), 1 pack of Clockwork infused coffee (one of these days, I’m going to write an entire post about how awesome marijuana coffee is in the morning), and 1 Caviar pre-rolled joint. Seriously, this gift set is aptly named.

7.) Adventure Gift Set. This set was custom built for Durango. For $85.20 after tax, you’ll get 1 LucidMood Energy, 1 Chapstick (yes, they make marijuana Chapstick), 1 package of Sativa Granola, and 1 Sativa pre-rolled joint.

As a bonus, if you come in and buy one of these sets for someone, we’ll throw in a $1 pre-rolled joint just for you because you’re so thoughtful (between you and me, there’s no way we’ll know if you’re buying the gift set for yourself, because who’s to say you don’t deserve it?). Of course, there are limitations and restrictions, so please come into our store for details (sorry for sounding like a commercial).

And finally, for the first time ever, we’ll also be selling loadable gift cards at The Greenery. Yes, actual gift cards you can load with any amount, just like the ones you get at coffee shops, but ours are better, you know… because “marijuana.” How cool is that? Everyone I know always seems to end up with a stack of plastic cards after the holidays, usually ones that’re only good for eating out or shopping online, but now, one of those cards will actually buy its recipient marijuana, as long as that recipient is 21 years or older with a valid ID. Like I said, these are wonderful times.

Anyway, this Christmas, I’m going to buy my brother-in-law the Flower Flight gift set. I’m going to walk in and pay for it, let one of our knowledgeable budtenders pack it up in a discrete brown paper bag with green tissue paper (just like they’ll do for you), I’m going to put a tag on it that says “to you, from #2,” and I’m going to smile like a winner when he smokes what’s inside and is forced to admit that Colorado pot is simply better than the west-coast stuff he grows in the woods. Sure, my gift set is going to come with an “I told you so,” but yours doesn’t have to.

So please, come in and see what I’m talking about. This year, any of our friendly budtenders can help you find that perfect gift for just about anyone, because We’re Your Best Buds, and we do the holidays right.

Best Bud of the Month

Posted on October 14, 2017 - 9:00 am

edibles, marijuana, cannabis, pot, western slope, budtender, durango dispensaries

Savanna Bristol
Assistant Compliance Manager & Flower Purchaser

About your Best Bud:

Savanna Bristol is a wee bit clumsy; running into things is a hobby of hers. Actually, I’ve seen her come close to death three times in a single shift. And she definitely needs to stay away from sharp objects. The last time we worked together, she got a metal splinter stuck in her finger (you know, “somehow”), and then when she walked by the couch, it “bit her leg” and she started bleeding. And her affliction goes beyond the workplace as well: this one time, Savanna decided to stand on top of Baker’s Bridge, and it didn’t go too well. Her friend didn’t want to jump, so Savanna may, or may not, have pushed him off. And then when she jumped after, she landed in a sitting position, and it broke her back—two of her vertebrae went “poof,” as she says it, but Savanna still looks back with a laugh when she tells the story.

However, her clumsiness doesn’t matter because Savanna has brains—she’s our assistant compliance manager, and it’s her job to steer our dispensary through all the weird, esoteric little regulations the state throws at us. She checks potency profiles and child-resistant packaging and font sizes, and she dedicates 100% of her attention to making sure we’re compliant (maybe that’s why she’s so clumsy). But here’s the rest of her story:

Q: When did you start working for The Greenery?
Savanna: “March of 2016.”

Q: What’s your favorite way to enjoy marijuana?
Savanna: “I love dabbing—it’s one hit, one high. And right now, I love the rosin we’re making. Seriously. The flavor is awesome, and the high is perfect!”

Q: What’s your favorite outdoor activity?
Savanna: “I love tubing the river or paddle-boarding the lake with my dog.”

Q: Tell us about your pet.
Savanna: “Nala is a seventy-five-pound Pitbull, but she’s a baby. She just has too much love to give.”

Q: Which station do you stream while you’re working at The Greenery?
Savanna: “Whichever one suits my mood, but it’s usually Die Antwoord or Disney music… I love Disney music.”

Q: What do you like most about working at The Greenery?
Savanna: “I love my coworkers and my customers. It doesn’t matter who you are; when you come into The Greenery, you’re in a good mood.”

Well, that’s Savanna. In a way, she’s our dispensary diva. She likes things her way, and if she doesn’t get it, she’s likely to throw a big bag of pot at your face (and fall down in the process). But frankly, there’s nothing wrong with her way, because she knows this industry inside and out, and it’s due to her efforts that we run a completely compliant dispensary. And she has good taste in pot, which is important—Savanna’s second duty is to order all the flower on our menu, and thanks to her, we’re able to offer ten premium strains of boutique flower to Durango each and every day. For her steadfast dedication to compliance, and for keeping our shelves stocked, The Greenery is in Savanna’s debt, and because of that, she is Your Best Bud for October! Thank you, Savanna!

Marijuana Edible Serving Size

Posted on September 9, 2017 - 9:00 am

marijuana edible dosage, edibles, marijuana, edible dosage, consuming edibles, highly edible, dixie elixirs, mountain high, incredibles, gummies, marijuana infused

“I ate way too many edibles this one time,” said every stoner, ever. For real. Everyone I know who enjoys the occasional edible has a similar horror story—one they look back on with an embarrassed shake of the head—because eating one milligram too many is an easy thing to do. So, as a stopgap, I’m going to share my story with you, and then I’ll tell you how to avoid the same mistake. Here it is:

I have my medical card, so I have to be especially careful—The Greenery is a recreational-only dispensary, so our edibles are limited to ten milligrams of THC per serving, but the medical shops around town don’t live under the same restrictions: I’ve seen them sell one-hundred-milligram brownies that’re small enough to eat in one bite, and that’s just scary, when you think about it (but I’ll get to that in a second).

Before I hired on here, I shopped at a medical place downtown. The sour gummies they sold were my favorite. Each gummy was ten milligrams, and two of them would put me exactly where I needed to be. But this one time (see?), the company that made my favorite sour gummies doubled their per-piece dosage. Nobody told me. And I’d just made it through an especially trying week, so I decided to have three gummies instead of two, because, you know… dumb. Anyway, as soon as the flavor faded from my mouth after gummy-number-three, something on the package caught my eye. I read on. And then the “oh shit” bubble appeared over my head as I realized I’d just eaten sixty milligrams instead of a hearty thirty. I got a glass of water and hunkered down with my afghan. Crazy things were coming…

I’m going to take a break here and tell you what you’re supposed to do if you eat too many edibles: stay hydrated, and remind yourself that the world isn’t ending. Pot isn’t anything like alcohol or narcotics, and for an adult, it impossible to overdose, even on edibles. All you need to do is find a safe place, drink water, and weather the storm, because nothing about marijuana is permanent. Anyway, let’s get back to it…

My story doesn’t end like a few of the good ones I’ve heard: I didn’t end up marooned in a tree or lost topless at a music festival. But I did end up on my bed, small and bundled as I fought the panic with the fetal position. I’m not going to minimize the feeling just because I’m a proponent of selling edibles to people; it’s my job to be honest with you and that’s what I’m going to do.

That night, it felt like my brain was interdimensional.

The world around me shrank and expanded, and I lost communication with my extremities somewhere along the way—there were dizzying thoughts and tumbling worries, and I just wanted it to end. Of course, I eventually passed out after an hour that was amusing only in retrospect, and the next morning, everything was right as rain. I didn’t even have a marijuana hangover, because they don’t exist. But I’ll tell you here and now that taking sixty milligrams of edible marijuana is something I’ll never do again.

But really, that doesn’t do you any good because everyone is different when it comes to edibles. We all have different metabolisms. So, while sixty milligrams might be a Hunter S. Thompson novel for me, the same dosage might not do a damn thing for you: everyone must find their own dosage. The trick is to take it slowly and not be reckless (you know, pretty much the way you’re supposed to live life), because if you do it right, an edible high is a wonderful, warm thing that you’ll want to relive over and over. So, I recommend that you start by taking a single serving, or less, and then gauge the effects. As I mentioned, at recreational shops in Colorado, everything tops out at ten milligrams per serving and one-hundred milligrams per package, so the “single serving” you should start with is ten milligrams. I rarely repeat myself or use bold typeface, but this occasion warrants a break from tradition.

Secondly, after you eat those ten milligrams, wait a solid hour before even thinking about eating more. That boldness was justified, too. For most people, it takes an entire hour before edibles start affecting the brain, and it takes two hours before you feel the full effect; the last thing you want to do is get impatient and toss more kindling into the fire. And after an hour, if the effect isn’t strong enough, remember that THC is lipid-soluble. If you’re not feeling anything, eat a handful of peanuts or half an avocado; the healthy fat will get down there and help the pot do its magic; it’s a symbiotic trick that’ll save you from an experience like mine.

Third, if you’re small like my wife, I’d recommend taking it a step further and halving that “single serving.” At The Greenery, we sell quite a few edibles that come in five milligram servings—like Highly Edible Pucks or Mountain High Sweet Pieces or Dixie Mints—and if you have a low THC tolerance, this might be the place to start.

And lastly, don’t feel like you need to remember all of this, and please don’t let it scare you away from a good time. Edible marijuana is the greatest invention since marijuana-infused sliced bread (learn how to bake it here), and all you need to do is be responsible when you experiment. As to remembering it all, at The Greenery, every single one of our budtenders knows what you just read—if you have questions, come in and ask them. If you buy edibles, and you’re interested, we’ll even throw into your bag a cheat-sheet that talks that talks about dosages and times so you don’t have to take notes. That’s the least we can do, because we’re Your Best Buds, and we want you to have a safe, enjoyable, edible time.

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