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What’s new at The Greenery?

You already know that The Greenery has the cheapest weed in Durango. We’re selling full ounces of bud for $59, half-ounces for $39, and eighths for $8; all these prices are after tax. And for the record, the only thing “cheap” about this weed is the price—this is still high-quality flower, and we’ve discounted it simply because times are tough for everyone. You’re already dealing with inflation and ludicrous gas prices, so we figured cheap weed would help during these nutty times.

And we’re taking things a step further because today, we just introduced the cheapest edible in Durango and the cheapest dab in Durango… here’s the rundown:

Cheapest Edible in Durango:

We’re excited to add Dablets to our shelves, and these 100mg THC edible packs are $9 after tax (but if you’re a regular, you know that all edibles are 15% off on Tuesday, which makes these bad boys $7.65 on Tuesdays). Isn’t that crazy? We’ve been around since day one of the legal cannabis movement here in Colorado, so it’s easy to remember when you couldn’t find a 100mg edible for less than $25 anywhere, so this is insane. This edible is available in Indica and Sativa.

And the reason this edible is so affordable has nothing to do with quality. Dablets are little pills that you swallow (10mg THC each), so there’s not much cost associated with the food portion of this edible, and since they’re so small (each pack is the size of a joint tube), the packaging costs were minimal as well. So, the good people over at Craft dropped the price of their Dablets considerably, and we’re passing along that savings.

Cheapest Dab in Durango:

We’re equally excited to introduce The Fifteen Dollar Dab, which today, is a full gram of shatter from Kayak. These grams won’t always be shatter because variety matters, so stay tuned for updates. And again, if you’re a regular, you know that all concentrates are 15% off on Wednesdays, which means you’ll be able to scoop a full-gram dab at The Greenery every Wednesday for $12.75 after tax, which is equally as insane as the edible deal. Seven years ago, when we first opened, we sold shatter for $65 per gram and it flew off the shelves. Now, seven years later, we’re proud to say that we’ve been able to drop that price by over 75%, which is awesome.

But hopefully, you also already know that The Greenery bests all the other shops in town on the other side of the spectrum as well. We have the best weed in Durango; we have the highest-quality edibles; we have true connoisseur dabs. And we’ve expanded these offerings as well for all you top-shelf shoppers, so here’s what’s new:

Malek’s Hand Rolls:

The superlative “best” is thrown around liberally in the cannabis industry, but these hand-rolls really are the best joints out there. Westword Magazine named these joints “Best in Denver” for 2022, and Westword knows what they’re talking about because they gave our Moroccan hash the same honor.

Each joint is filled with 1.75 of the best pot imaginable (it’s always ground bud and never shake/trim), and each one is literally rolled by hand, but don’t worry, they use a sponge to wet the glue, so there’s no stranger saliva on these things. And what’ve even cooler is that they use a spiral noodle (yes, and actual noodle) for the tip, and the noodle is gluten-free just in case. Crazy, right? Then they skewer each joint with a toothpick right down the center for better air flow, and they’re rolled with pink Blazy Susan papers, so there’s no such thing as a better joint. These hand-rolls are $18 after tax.

Alchemy Crystals from First Matter

Simply put, these Alchemy Crystals represent the pinnacle of dabs. The team over at First Matter takes potent Live Resin and renders it down to purify it further, and then they allow it to recrystallize into the purest, most potent form of marijuana on the market. These full-gram dabs look like transparent quartz crystals, and they test close to 99% pure THCa, which takes a true scientist to achieve. These diamonds are $72 out-the-door, and they deliver a clean, bright, mind-altering high like no other.

Higgs Joint Packs

Higgs didn’t used to be anything to write home about, but now, they’ve partnered with PMPCO, which is one of Colorado’s best cannabis cultivations. In fact, we sell eighths of loose flower from PMPCO for $49 after tax, but there’s an eighth worth of the same flower already rolled into joints in these packs that we sell for $43, so they’re a savvy choice.

There are six joints in each pack that are a little over a half-gram each, which makes for a 3.5g package total, and the pack itself looks a lot like a cigarette pack, so it fits perfectly in your pocket. That, and each pack comes with a branded book of matches, which is a nice touch.

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Of course, we aren’t stopping there. Our purchasing team here at The Greenery scours the market on a weekly basis looking for the newest and greatest, so there’s plenty more coming down the pipe (pun intended). Here’s a little sneak peek as to what’s coming soon:

Blunts in Durango:

Sometime early in July, we’ll have the Honest Blunt Packs on our shelves, and this is huge. Each pack is nitrogen-flushed, so the weed stays harvest-fresh forever, and each pack contains 6 blunts that are 0.7g each for a 4.2g package total. These blunts are rolled with organic hemp as opposed to tobacco, so you get CBDa instead of nicotine, and they’re rolled with a 100-years-old cigar rolling machine from Cuba, which is just cool. The ridged case fits perfectly in your pocket and it protects the blunts, so all the boxes are checked with this coming-soon product.

And that’s that, my friends! Keep checking back in for awesome updates such as this one, and remember, We’re Your Best Buds!

Eight Dollar Eighths

Have you ever gotten one of those holiday tins of candied popcorn? The last one I had was a crazy hodgepodge of cheese and chocolate and caramel corn all mixed together, and when I finally got to the bottom of it, all that was left was a witch’s brew of small cheesy and chocolate chunks mixed with bits of caramel. It was delightful.

Yeah, this is an odd way to start a blog about pot, but I promise there’s a parallel. We order our flower in bulk, obviously, and it comes in huge bags. After we sell most of it, what’s left in the bottom of the bag is all the good stuff—tons of kief, little orange hairs. and pieces of “popcorn” bud that are all flower and no stem. Frankly, the leftovers are almost better than the big buds from which they come, but it doesn’t have the same “bag appeal,” which means it doesn’t look as good as full-fledged flower to most people.

But budtenders aren’t most people. We know that the shake in a dispensary is different from what most people call “shake.” It’s all the good stuff, just like the tasty remnants in the bottom of a holiday popcorn tin, and we love it. It’s just as potent and pure as the big buds that made it; it’s perfect for rolling joints because you don’t need to grind it; most importantly, this stuff is ridiculously affordable.

Up until now, when we got to the bottom of the bag, we’d sell a little of it as a “shake special,” but then we’d buyout the rest for ourselves. After all, working in a pot shop has its perks. But we’ve decided to share. So, from now on, we’re going to weigh out this shake into eighths, and we’re selling it for $8 after tax. Yes, you read that correctly, you’ll be able to stop by The Greenery on any day of the week and leave with a full 3.5 grams of the good stuff for eight bucks.

It’s kinda crazy, if I’m being honest, because I’ve been in this game long enough to remember when you couldn’t find an eighth of any sort for under $40, but times are changing. Weed is getting cheaper for us, which means it’ll get cheaper for you because we’re all on the same team. Five years ago, the most affordable ounce we offered was $349, but now we sell pre-packed ounces every day for $59 after tax. Seriously, that’s an 83% cut. A couple weeks ago, we debuted our $39 pre-packed half-ounces, which was also unheard-of back in the day. And in another week or two, we’ll start selling a 100mg edible for $9 after tax, which is mindboggling considering how everything started.

Lastly, yes, prices are dropping everywhere, but it’d be amiss to not tell you that ours are by far the most affordable in Durango. The cheapest ounce sold by any of our competitors is $80.40 after tax, and we beat that by over twenty bucks. The same goes for half-ounces and eights and concentrates and edibles. Simply put, we’re doing everything we can to give you the best possible prices on everything, including these new $8 eighths, because We’re Your Best Buds!

420 Deals in Durango

Our 4/20 sale is going to be the best one ever, just like this is the shorted blog we’ve ever posted. And two of the best 420 specials we’re running aren’t even on the poster, so get here early. We’re Your Best Buds!

Most Affordable Highest Testing Marijuana in Durango

I know… that title was a mouth full. Sorry about that. But really, it sums up perfectly that which I’m trying to get across: The Greenery sells the best, most affordable, highest-testing flower in Durango. For real, starting right now, you can get an eighth of 30%+ THC cannabis for $34 after tax every Monday in our shop, which isn’t something I would’ve believed a year ago. Honestly, even the words “cheapest high testing marijuana” sound like they belong in an oxymoron as opposed to a blog, and yet if you look at our flower menu HERE, you’ll see that every word rings true.

Surprise! If you just clicked that link, you also figured out that we just lowered all our flower prices down to a place they’ve never been in the seven-year history of our company. But, why now? How is this even possible? No, it’s not because we’re getting high on our own supply, like Biggie always warned against, but rather, we’re all simply reaping the rewards gifted to us by supply and demand. I know this is a marijuana blog, so I’m not going to bore you with economics, but it’s important to know that Colorado is simply awash in low-priced, high-testing bud at the moment.

It’s an odd phenomenon, but for some reason, everyone who jumps into this industry of ours wants to be a grower. I guess the romanticized alure of growing weed is too much for most fledgling entrepreneurs to ignore, so cultivations keep popping up everywhere. Seriously, just to give you an idea, there are around 750 licensed cannabis cultivations in the state even though we have only 650 dispensaries or so, meaning that supply is outpacing demand. So, just like it is with every other commodity in the world, when there’s a glut, the competition cuts prices, and then you, my friend, get to bask in the savings. That’s why we just cut all our flower prices, some of which were reduced by nearly 20%.

What about the potency? Why does the Greenery now sell tons of flower that’s over 30% THC when most of it was 20%+ last week? Well, two reasons. One, we just had a bumper crop in The Greenery Grow thanks to some new nutrients, and our Super Lemon Haze in particular turned out splendidly. It’s testing over 30% THC and it smells like a bucket full of overripe lemons. Our Wedding Cake broke 28% even though it’s usually a low-testing indica, and our Super White came out much more “super” than usual. Good times all around. And the second reason our pot is more potent is that we made some new friends!

We’ve made a concerted effort lately to meet other cultivators around the state, especially those living and working in Boulder. Think about it this way: if you want to call yourself a real Country/Western singer, you absolutely must perform in Nashville—if you want to call yourself a real cannabis cultivator, you must grow in Boulder to see how you stack up against the best. So, that’s where we went. Just like the commercial says, we’re bringing big-city bud to this beautiful mountain town, and we’re going to keep it up. We’ve got some White Hot Guava on the way that’s pushing 34% THC, and it’ll be followed by nothing but fire, so if you’re a true cannabis connoisseur, you need to get in here ASAP.

Granted, the tetrahydrocannabinol percentage in pot doesn’t matter nearly as much as most people think (please excuse me while I climb up on my soapbox). Please remember that the higher the THC climbs, the further everything else falls, including terpenes and minor cannabinoids. Terpenes are what gives smoke flavor, and they determine the complexity of your high, so the potent stuff doesn’t always taste as delightful as the cannabis on our shelves with lower THC. A good way to think about it would be to compare grain alcohol (like Ever Clear) to whiskey: the grain alcohol is much more potent at around 80% alcohol, but there’s no complexity to the taste, as where whiskey is half as potent at 40% alcohol, and it can taste wonderful. So, they’ll both get you drunk, but you’ll enjoy the whiskey as where the grain alcohol is better suited for cleaning bongs.

That, and THC content has very little to do with quality. In fact, there will be plenty of times when you’ll notice that we’re charging less for strains that test higher than those on our top shelf. We do this because quality—determined by things like terpene content, bud structure, and grow ingredients—is more important than potency, and the two aren’t even remotely mutually exclusive. This is important stuff, but it’s time to climb down and stop preaching…

So, come see us ASAP! We have more affordable weed on our menu that tests higher than before, which means you can have your Ethos Wedding Cake and smoke it, too. All of us here at The Greenery will keep doing our best to bring you new, potent strains with Boulder quality and more affordability, because after all, We’re Your Best Buds!

The Best Marijuana in Durango

It’s right here at The Greenery. And hopefully, you already knew that; I’ve been telling you for years that we grow the best cannabis this side of the continental divide. However, let’s be honest: The Greenery Grow is awesome, but it’s not the biggest operation in the world because we’ve always taken the “quality over quantity” route. Our mom tent is big enough for thirty plants or so, meaning we have around thirty different strains in our genetics library that we can rotate through our flowering rooms. We grow some heavy hitters like Sour Diesel, Super Lemon Haze, and Runtz, but still, variety is the spice of life, and there’s no way our customers would stay happy if they had to smoke the same 30 varietals for the rest of their lives, so we also bring in some of the best cannabis from across Colorado to supplement what comes out of our cultivation. This morning, as I was sitting at my desk in a stupor wondering what I’d write about this week, I realized that I’ve never told you anything about the cultivations that produce some of the flower we bring into Durango specifically for variety’s sake, so, that’s exactly what I’m going to do. Here you go:

Boulder Built is probably my favorite at the moment because to say that their genetics are “rare and exotic” would be an understatement. This is the team that brought you strains like Mr. Nasty and Flavor Crystals (pictured above), the former of which is a cross between GMO and Grease Monkey; the latter is created by crossing Grape Pie with Legend Orange Apricot. Boulder Built puts time and science into their craft, and the buds that come out of their cultivation are comically awesome—they’re huge and dense and covered with crystals that coat your hands when you play with your pot.

Silver Lake is another good one, and they’re shipping us four pounds of flower (all of which tests over 30% THC) as I type this. This place takes things up a step given that they cure all their cannabis in glass, which protects the flavor, but more importantly, they bring the variety. These guys grow about a billion different cultivars, so we’ll always bring in their newest and best to keep fresh our flower offerings. And not for nothing, 30% THC is impressive. This number quite literally means that a solid 30% of the flower’s weight is from pure THC, so please start low and go slow with this stuff. It packs a punch.

Next comes In The Flo, which is a company that has long supplied us with fire. I’d argue that this grow is the best wholesale-only cultivation in the state, and they focus on many of the classics (like Lemon Skunk) while peppering in exotics (like Don Shula). And if you’re paying attention and know your Colorado cannabis companies, you’ll notice that most of the brands I’m talking about are rooted in Boulder, which is no mistake. If you call yourself a true country/western singer, you’ve preformed in Nashville—if you call yourself a true cannabis breeder/grower, you’ve grown in Boulder. That’s just how it works, but the reason behind it lies with the OG Boulder growers who put Colorado on the map, one of which is In The Flo.

Lastly, per regular flower, anyway, comes Hummingbird Brand. We haven’t ordered from these guys yet (we will shortly), but it’s exciting to add Hummingbird to our lineup. They too are from Boulder, and they’re associated with The Farm family of dispensaries, which is woman-owned and simply awesome. These guys care about sustainability and organic practices, and they do everything right. Their bud is fluffy and bright and packed full of terpenes because they care more about flavor than potency, so it’s a win/win for everyone because we’ll charge a little less for this stuff than we will the potent, high-dollar stuff. Specifically, I’m excited about Skinny Pineapple (one of the strains Hummingbird bred) because the terp profile is insane: the flower smells like a bowl of fruit salad, the smoke tastes like a pineapple tart, and the high is downright tropical.

Now, the reason I used “regular flower” as a condition at the beginning of the previous paragraph is that it’d be amiss to not discuss the Sun Rocks we started selling recently from Dadirri. A “Sun Rock” is a bud of cannabis that’s been coated in distillate and then covered in Bubble Hash, which is why this uber-potent smokable doesn’t count as “regular flower” even though you smoke it as such. This stuff is dank and deep per the flavor, and the potent high breaks down the barriers those of us with high tolerances have standing between us and a good time, so I cannot tell you how much I love this stuff. And really, this just goes to show that we really are doing all we can to bring in the best cannabis products, because Dadirri is a solventless concentrate manufacturer, just like our own Hash Factory, but we added them to the mix because their Sun Rocks are second to none, which is what you deserve.

And that’s that! Please keep checking back in to learn all there is to know about recreational cannabis, and please keep checking our menu HERE because we’re always bringing in new flower strains. I promise that I’ll do a better job talking about all the new and exciting flower we’ll be sourcing from around Colorado, and I promise that The Greenery will stay focused on variety and quality when it comes to our weed, because We’re Your Best Buds!

New Marijuana Products in Durango

We have cannabutter! I know I usually open these blogs with an artsy introduction or whatever, but I skipped it this week because I’m inexplicably excited by butter that gets you high. I mean, isn’t it crazy? It might just be because I’m old, but it’s mind-blowing to think that you can walk into a store (that’s us) and buy a stick of butter that’s infused with cannabis. Each stick is marked into ten, 10mg squares, and one of them is perfectly sized for your morning toast or an evening dinner roll. This stuff is ideal for baking; it’s one of the most versatile edibles we sell; it comes in a child-resistant package that fits perfectly in the butter compartment in your fridge.

And if you remember my blog about how lipid-soluble edibles work (if not, read it HERE), you know that it’s important to consume fats alongside your edibles for efficacy, so cannabutter is perfect because the cannabis and fats are already living together in the butter. This is the original, old-school cannabis edible, and it’s definitely a staff favorite, so next time you’re shopping for an edible, try thinking outside the gummy and chose a box of butter.

But if “old-school” isn’t your thing and you want to try the newest “it” edible on our shelves, look no further than our Nitro Coffee. You read that correctly. We’re now selling single-serving, 10mg THC cans of nitrogen-infused coffee for that foamy goodness and smooth mouthfeel. This coffee is non-GMO, gluten-free, and vegan, so it’s perfect for the new-age nitro coffee type (just make sure to read the directions because opening a child-resistant, pressurized can of coffee is interesting).

The next two new products are also firmly in the “new-school” category: CBN and CBG vapes from O.pen. It seems like I’ve been writing quite a few blogs lately centered on minor cannabinoids (you can read about THCV HERE and CBN HERE), but all of those discussions were about edibles, not vape products, so I promise I’m not repeating myself. But before we get too far into it, I wanted to point out that here at The Greenery, we’re always the first in Durango to bring you the newest cannabis products available on the market. We were the first to start selling fast-acting edibles in Durango. We were the first to sell crystalline (THCa diamonds). We were the first to sell Live Rosin, the first to sell solventless vapes and gummies, and the first (and only) dispensary in Durango to start selling traditional, kief-based concentrates. So, guess what? We’re also the first to start selling vaporizer cartridges that contain CBG and CBN alongside the THC, and we’ll have them available as soon as February first.

So, what is “CBN” or “CBG”? Well, the former is “cannabinol,” and it purportedly makes you tired, so it may act like a sleep aid. But please remember, I’m not a doctor, so I am in no way qualified to give you medical advice, and I’m not a scientist, so I haven’t studied these cannabinoids enough to tell you definitively what they can or cannot do for you. It’s important to consult your primary care physician if you’d like to try this or that cannabinoid for this or that medical ailment, and it’s equally important to know that sufficient studies on these cannabinoids have not been completed given that weed is illegal federally, so nobody knows for sure what they can do. That’s why it’s important to take these newly isolated cannabinoids with a grain of salt and a skeptical mind. For example, if you’re looking for a good night’s sleep, try a CBN edible (or the vape I’ll tell you about shortly), but really pay attention to how it makes you feel. If you’re tired, maybe it worked, and maybe you should try it again. If you’re not, it didn’t, so don’t. Get it? Personal “trial and error” is the only way to see through all the murky nonsense that surrounds legal weed.

Anyway… back on track. Long story short, I’ve already told you that CBN might act like a sleep aid, but up until now, we’ve sold it only in edible form. And as you know, edibles (even the fast-acting ones) take a while to kick in. Vapes, however, are nearly instant. So, if you’re trying to fall asleep quickly, or if you wake up intermittently throughout the night and you need something to knock you back out, try this new CBN vape from O.pen. Who knows? It could be exactly what you’ve been looking for.

Now that I think about it, I’m not sure I’ve ever told you about CBG, or “cannabigerol,” even though we’re already selling an edible containing it (it’s the Pear flavor of Wyld gummy, which is just awesome/delicious). Anyway, CBG is often referred to as “the mother of all cannabinoids” because it’s the first one to show up in immature cannabis plants, and it’s the one from which most other cannabinoids eventually develop. As to what this stuff does, again, nobody is 100% sure (and if they say they are, they’re lying), but it’s reported to be the feel-good cannabinoid. Theoretically, when CBG binds to the receptors in your endocannabinoid system, it may strengthen the function of anandamide, which is a neurotransmitter associated with pleasure.

Personally, getting high makes me happy, so it’s the THC to thank, not CBG, but extra giggles are never bad. So, if you have a frown that you’d like to turn upside-down, and you’d like to try cannabis to do so, maybe this stuff is for you. We have it in the nearly-instant vaporizer option I’ve been talking about, and the tasty, pear-flavored gummy version I mentioned earlier, so it’s easy to try cannabigerol no matter your consumption preference.

However, the theme I’m really trying to get across here is that if it’s cannabis-related and it’s new, we have it, so if you like new and exciting things, come see us at 208 Parker Avenue, or order online HERE. The Greenery has long been the best recreational cannabis dispensary in Durango in that we intentionally do our best to stay on the forefront of new marijuana products even though we’re tucked away in Bodo Park here in a tiny Colorado mountain town. We always want to make sure our local community has access to the newest and greatest cannabis innovations available across the industry, because We’re Your Best Buds!

CBN in Durango

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Let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, marijuana was illegal. The people fought this fact with everything they had, and in the end, it was marijuana’s medicinal properties that led to change; medicinal marijuana was legalized in Colorado in the year 2000. And back then, marijuana was treated and sold like medicine. Yes, people looked for THC because it got them high, but the medical shops also focused on the other cannabinoids like CBD, CBG, and CBN because those are the compounds that most people consider to be “medicinal.”

After a few years of legal medical pot, we were able to prove that marijuana isn’t an evil thing that leads to jazz music and two-headed babies like the opponents thought, so Colorado legalized recreational marijuana in 2014. Of course, this made getting pot much easier because all you needed was a driver’s license proving that you were over twenty-one, so slowly but surely, medical patients let their prescription cards expire because they were no longer necessary. More and more recreational shops started to open, and prices started to drop right alongside the demand for medical shops; medical dispensaries started closing across the state.

In a way, this is sad—the medical approach that led to legalization is slowly being abandoned because recreational marijuana is easier, but that’s just the way it goes when it comes to capitalism. However, something else is disappearing. Most recreational shoppers aren’t looking for CBD, CBG, or CBN because they don’t get you high, so, thanks to supply and demand, the medicinal cannabinoids I mentioned earlier are becoming difficult to find in Colorado… that’s where The Greenery comes in. Yes, we love selling the stuff that makes our customers high and happy, but we know that for many people, marijuana is medicine, and we’re loyal to the medicinal marijuana that gave us legalization in the first place. So, in our Durango dispensary, you can still find products rich is secondary cannabinoids because a “high” isn’t all that matters. We sell all sorts of stuff that focuses on cannabinoids such as THCa or CBG or CBN, and for this week’s post, I wanted to focus on the latter because CBN is some wonderful stuff.

Technically, CBN (or “cannabinol”) is considered to be psychoactive by some, but plenty of people argue this designation. For something to be “psychoactive,” it needs to “affect the mind” like THC does by getting you high. And CBN doesn’t really do this, but since it makes you tired (which is a mental effect, if you think about it), about half the cannabis world calls CBN the “other psychoactive cannabinoid.” Either way, when most cannabis enthusiasts look for something that may act like a sleep aid, they turn to CBN, and here at The Greenery, we sell three CBN-rich products thanks to our focus on medicinal products despite what the market is doing. Here they are:

1.) CBN Capsules from Mary’s Medicinals. Each of these capsules will deliver 5mg CBN (with is a wonderful serving size for a good night’s sleep) and 1mg THC for that perfect entourage effect. This product will cost you $90 out-the-door (for a pro tip, check the price on Tuesday), but that’s only because the cannabis plant produces only a minimal amount of CBN, so this cannabinoid is difficult and costly to isolate. That being said, there are also 30 capsules in each bottle, which comes out to a month’s supply. But if you’re looking to try CBN to see if it’s worth the cost, check out this next product:

2.) CBN Transdermal Patches. This product will cost you only $12 out-the-door, it delivers 10mg CBN, and it’s a single-serving patch that you put someplace venous like the inner wrist or the top of your foot. Many of our customers swear by these things because once they slap it on, the patch can deliver CBN through your skin for up to 12 hours, which could definitely make for a good night’s sleep.

3.) CBN Transdermal Gel Pens. This product represents a happy medium between the first two products because it’ll cost you $60 after tax, and it contains 100mg CBN. The pen will deliver 2mg CBN per serving, and all you do is click a little button to dispense the transdermal cream, which you then apply to a thin-skinned area so it can soak into your blood stream. Neat, right?

So, if you’re a past medical marijuana patient who’s frustrated by the fact that all the medical shops in Colorado are closing and you can’t find “medicinal” cannabinoids, come see us at 208 Parker Avenue. All you’ll need is a valid I.D. proving that you’re 21 or over, but if you have a valid Colorado-issued medical card as well, we’ll give you a 20% discount, because We’re Your Best Buds!

Marijuana Paraphernalia

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Do you know the difference between a “pipe” and a “bowl,” or the difference between a “bong” and a “water pipe”? Well, there isn’t one, and that’s the sort of thing that confuses many of our customers. But if you think about it, it’s not their fault: marijuana paraphernalia is used all over the planet, and just like with everything else, regional slang terms rarely stay in the region they come from, and the different terms eventually become interchangeable (just like “sub” and “hoagie” and “po’ boy” all mean “big sandwich”). As such, there are all sorts of colloquialisms we use to describe this or that piece of paraphernalia, and this week, I’ve decided to talk about all of them (or most of them, at least) to clear up some of the confusion. If you’re a regular smoker, most of these terms will be familiar, but you should keep reading anyway; give yourself a point for each term you already know. Let’s get started…

The word “bong” refers to a tall pipe that filters the smoke through water; it’s as simple as that. But a long time ago—at least, it was a long time ago here in Colorado—the word “bong” was taboo. If you went into a headshop and asked for a bong, you’d get kicked out because the term “bong” was associated with marijuana which used to be illegal, so you had to ask for a “water pipe” instead. Yeah, it’s stupid, but marijuana paraphernalia used to be just as illegal as marijuana, so the headshops had to follow the rules and be militant about not selling “bongs,” even though they were. In this case, the two terms were spawned by what was legal and what wasn’t, but all you really need to know is that the term “bong” and “water pipe” refer to the same thing (and now, you can say “bong” all day long in headshops and they’re cool with it). But as a disclaimer, if the bong is really small, or if it’s the shape of a pipe, it’s called a “bubbler” because of the noise the smoke makes as it goes through the water.

As to the bong itself, the glass tube through which the smoke travels down into the water is called the “stem,” and some stems have lots of holes in them to diffuse the smoke in the water—in this instance, the stem is called a “diffuser.” But if the bong is super fancy, it’ll have a “percolator,” which is a separate chamber that diffuses the smoke a second time through a “tree,” which is just a bunch of smaller diffusers. And a lot of bongs will have an “ice catch,” which is nothing more than a depression in the bong tube that’s designed to hold ice cubes to cool your hits (I’m a big fan of these). Lastly, if the bowl of the bong is on top, and there are multiple mouthpieces that allow more than one person to smoke at once, you’re smoking a “hookah,” not a bong.

Alright, on to pipes. The term “pipe” is the most common term (obviously), but words like “piece” or “bowl” are thrown around quite a bit as well. Most of the other terms refer to the shape or size of the pipe. For instance, the word “Gandalf” refers to a pipe with a long, arching stem, just like the one Gandalf smoked throughout the movies. Also, for the record, Gandalf was a total stoner, and if you don’t believe me, Saruman has my back—in the Hobbit movie, he told Gandalf that his “love for the halflings’ leaf has slowed your mind,” which is an obvious pot reference (yeah, I’m a nerd). And if the Gandalf pipe is smaller than something a wizard might use, it’s called a “Sherlock” thanks to the famous detective’s favorite pipe. If the pipe has a flattened mouthpiece, it’s called a “spoon” because it looks like one. And some old-school pipes have a metal chamber in between the bowl and mouthpiece into which you can put a small amount of flower (the smoke flows over the bud and coats it with resin which makes it more potent); these pieces are called “chamber pipes.”

If the pipe has a large carb (the hole you cover with your finger) on the end instead of the side, it’s called a “steamroller” because when you take your finger off the hole, the direct path of air hits you like a steamroller. Or, if you load your flower into the front of the pipe instead of the top, the pipe is called a “chillum,” which is a term that dates back to when people would use “chillers” to hold their cigarettes just like Cruella de Vil did when she wasn’t busy trying to catch dalmatian puppies. Or, if the pipe is really small, it’s called a “sneak-a-toke” for obvious reasons. But if the pipe is small and you load a small amount into the front of it, it’s called a “bat.” Some bats are made from glass, but they’re usually metal and painted to look like a cigarette for discretion. And to take things a step further, a bat fits into a “dugout,” which is a wooden block that has been dug out to make room for a bat and a small amount of flower (we sell these in our Durango dispensary, so if you need a visual, come see us).

The most self-expletory piece of paraphernalia is a “grinder,” which is a small box you use to grind flower. If you grind your pot and roll it into a joint and then smoke it until not much is left, this is called a “roach” because the burnt end looks like a roach. And as you’d imagine, it’s difficult to hold the roach because it’s so small, so most people use a hemostat to hold it. But since we’re stoners, we don’t use words like “hemostat”: we prefer “alligator clip” or “roach clip.” I know I just used a couple terms like “joint” that don’t pertain to paraphernalia, but don’t worry, if you’re fuzzy on marijuana-related words, I wrote an entire piece on the subject that you can read HERE.

Moving on.

As I’m sure you know, new-school cannabis concentrates, or “dabs,” are becoming quite popular, and with them comes a whole new litany of slang terms, so I’ll get into that, too. The simplest device is a “vape pen,” but these are also called “dab pens” or “hash pens.” Vape pens are comprised of two components: the “battery” and the “vape cartridge,” or the “cart” for short, but we also sell all-in-one “disposable vape pens” that are super simple to use.

The next step up would be a “dab rig,” which is a specially-designed pipe you use to dab concentrates. Besides the rig, you’ll also need a “torch” and a “dabber.” You use the butane torch to heat the “nail,” and you use the dabber (which is sometimes called a “dab tool”) to apply the concentrate to the nail—nails can be made from titanium, quartz, glass, or porcelain. But if the dab rig has a bowl you heat instead of a nail, the bowl is called the “banger.” Granted, if this is something you’re interested in trying, I’d recommend coming into our shop for a demonstration because it’d be easier to show you how it works than to explain it, but I’m going to soldier on.

Some rigs have a glass “dome” that goes over the nail, but if the rig has a banger instead of a nail, it usually has a “carb cap” as well, which is something you put on top of the bowl after putting in the concentrate so smoke doesn’t escape. The last thing you need to know per rigs is that some of them are pretty high-tech; they have an “e-nail” which is an electronically-heated nail that doesn’t require a torch.

However, some people who prefer dabs don’t like the size and inconvenience of using a dab rig, so they’ll use a “wax pen,” which is a pocket-sized, electronic device into which dabs can be placed. But it’s difficult to get a huge hit from a wax pen, so some people prefer to use a “dab straw,” which is a long tube made from glass or metal. You heat the tip of the straw with your torch, and then put it directly into the concentrate while sucking through the straw (which is why it’s called a “straw”). Lastly, if the straw is large and it has a water chamber in the middle of it, it’s called a “nectar collector.”

We’re done! I hope this cleared things up for you if you’re a novice, and if you’re a regular smoker, I’d love to know how many points you got. But if you’re still fuzzy on any of these terms, you’re more than welcome to come see us at 208 Parker Avenue or give us a shout at (970) 403-3710; we’ll answer all your questions. And of course, we sell quite a few of the aforementioned pieces of paraphernalia at a low price right here in our Durango dispensary, because We’re Your Best Buds!

Cannabis Etiquette

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Smoking pot is a social thing. It breaks the ice, it forms bonds and friendships, it reminds us that being together is better than being apart. There’s simply something about cannabis culture that’s harmonious and gregarious, peace-loving and friendly, and that’s why I love this plant so much. Think about it: when alcohol comes to mind, so does belligerence and abandon, but when pot comes to mind, you picture calm smiles and companionship. But now that marijuana is becoming more mainstream, our culture is changing. Altria (the company that makes Marlboro cigarettes) just invested billions into cannabis, the companies that make Corona and Heineken are already producing cannabis-infused beer, and new stories of corporate acquisitions in the cannabis industry are popping up daily. Pot is becoming a business as opposed to a pleasant secret.

So, what’s that going to do? Is weed going to morph into a pedestrian thing just like all the other stuff you can buy in a corner store? Is the communal, loving culture that’s synonymous with cannabis going to change into blatant consumerism once weed is grown and sold by the same companies that pedal cigarettes? I don’t know. But I do know that the only way to preserve something wonderful is to talk about it and educate the masses—the only way to keep something communal is to discuss the way it brings us together and how to keep it that way. So, this week, I decided to write about how to smoke with other people in a way that preserves the culture that got us here in the first place. If you heed the following rules, you’ll avoid making a flower faux pas, and when you’re smoking with other people, you’ll come across as an OG who cares what pot is all about…

1.) Bring some if you’re invited. Remember, sharing is caring, and that’s what it’s all about. If a buddy invites you to a smoke session, bring some pot. Your buddy called you to be together, not just to get you high, so keep things equal by contributing.

2.) Pay back if you cannot contribute. If you don’t have anything to contribute to a smoke session, take a mental note, because I guarantee that whoever gets you high will remember it, and if you always show up emptyhanded, the invites will start to dwindle. It’s commonsense: if someone smokes you out, you should smoke him or her out.

3.) Think about the group, not yourself; doing so reinforces the sense of community that makes getting high together so wonderful. There are easy ways to do this:

4.) If you load the bowl, offer the first hit to someone else. The first hit, or the “green” hit, is always the most flavorful, so offering it to someone else is tantamount to offering a gift, and that’s exactly the type of thing that brings people together. Of course, there’s an exception to every rule: if you’re smoking a joint or blunt, and you rolled it, it’s okay to light it yourself and take the first hit (it’s the little reward that comes from taking the time to roll a joint).

5.) If someone offers you the first hit, don’t burn all the green in the bowl. Instead, apply the flame to the side of the bowl and burn only a little of the green so the next person in the circle gets some flavor, too. This is called taking a “hippy hit,” and hippies are all about love, which is important.

6.) Keep passing the pipe or joint to the left. If you’re a regular smoker, what I’m about to tell you will sound obscenely obvious, so please remember that I’m writing this for everyone. When people get together to smoke, they form a circle, and it’s important to pass the pipe to your left. Snoop Dog raps about this regularly, and other songs like “Pass the Dutchie on the Lefthand Side” keep the tradition alive, but there’s a reason for it you might not know. Most people are righthanded, so if you pass to your left, you’re putting the pipe directly into your neighbor’s dominant hand, so it’s easier for them to take the pot. True, if you pass to your right, it’s easier because you don’t have to cross your arm to your left, but remember, it’s not about you. It’s about the group, and it needs to stay that way.

7.) Don’t sober shame. Remember, smoking pot in a social setting is about being inclusive. If someone is standing in your circle, and he or she doesn’t want to smoke, don’t give that individual any crap for his or her choice. He or she belongs in the group just as much as you do because being friendly is more important than getting high. But if you’re that person who prefers to stay sober, take the pipe when it’s handed to you and then pass it along instead of holding up your hands and saying “no.” If you’re standing in a circle, don’t break it.

8.) Keep the pipe or joint moving. Let’s be honest: people are intrinsically self-centered, and we all like to be the center of attention. And when a pipe is handed to you, the entire circle’s attention will shift to you. Some people will revel in the spotlight, and they’ll stand there holding the pipe and start talking because everyone is watching. Don’t be that guy; nobody likes that guy. We’re watching you because you’re holding the pot, not because what you’re saying is so interesting. So, take a damn hit and then pass the pipe because we want it, too! If you can’t tell, this one is my personal pet peeve, and it’s usually everyone else’s as well. Holding the pipe and talking is called “camping” (because you’re making the pot stay in one place), and people will usually drop hints like, “hey, you plan on pitching a tent?” Or, they’ll tell you not to “bogart the pot,” because Humphry Bogart always had an unlit cigarette hanging out of his mouth. Don’t camp, don’t bogart, and we’ll all get along.

9.) Don’t slobber on the pipe. There are all sorts of derogatory and disgusting terms for this that I’m going to omit from this blog, but for the love of all things holy, don’t get your spit all over the pipe; there’s nothing worse than a wet hit. If you’re a fan of using too much Chapstick, or you notice that you slobbered the pipe inadvertently, wipe the mouthpiece discreetly on your shirt before passing the pipe to your left.

10.) Let the circle know if you’re sick. For real, the group’s health is more important than your high. If you’re sick, don’t smoke. Or, better yet, bring your own pipe or joint and let it be well-known as to why you’re not sharing. People will thank you for it, and it’s the kind thing to do, especially since more and more people are smoking now and quite a few of us have healthy kids at home to worry about.

11.) Don’t pass an empty bowl. There’s nothing more disappointing than trying to take a hit and not getting one, so if you take the last hit, announce to the group that the “bowl is cashed.” And if you’re contributing to the circle, go ahead and load a new bowl. In this scenario, it’s okay to take the green hit yourself so you don’t miss out on the rotation, but remember the hippy hit.

12.) Don’t “chaz the banger,” or “crust the nail.” Yeah, I gripe about pot becoming big business, but there are some benefits that stem from all the progression, such as the availability of new-school dabs. And with dabs, there comes a whole new litany of rules, but I’ll just list two of them and leave it at that. For one, when you offer someone else a dab, if you’re using your rig, it’s polite to heat the nail and apply the dab yourself while your friend hits. Doing so stresses the communal feel of getting high together, kind of like lighting someone else’s cigarette. But if you’re using someone else’s rig and dabs, the urge to get as high as possible off someone else’s stuff will kick in, and you might overheat the nail to get it as hot as possible to get a big hit: don’t do this. This move is selfish, which goes against the culture, but worse than that, it’ll “chaz” or “crust” the nail, which could make it break at worst, or make the next dab taste bad at best. Remember, think about other people.

See? There’s more to smoking pot than simply lighting it on fire and breathing in the smoke, and just about all of it has to do with getting along together as a group. It’s the keystone to our culture, and it’s important because if we don’t hang onto tradition, smoking pot could turn into something tawdry like taking a shot of cheap tequila at a dive bar. And this “culture” that I keep talking about is alive and well here in our Durango dispensary; we’ve built our business on it. We offer discounts to veterans and people with Colorado medical cards, because these people need it the most. We use living bugs in our grow to kill the bad bugs because we want to keep things as natural as possible. And we do everything we can to preserve the original, communal essence of the cannabis industry, because We’re Your Best Buds!

Connoisseur Cannabis

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Lately, I’ve noticed a shift. About a year ago, most shoppers would come in and ask for my “cheapest” cannabis, but now, people are requesting the “best.” I know this change is occurring, but I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s because people bought from illegal dealers less than half a decade ago, and back then, you got what you got, and price was the only variable. But now that there’s a wide variety of legal cannabis, maybe people are slowly starting to lean towards quality over price. Or maybe it’s because legal cannabis has made it so a new, affluent demographic of shopper is buying weed. Or better yet, maybe the consumer base is being educated by a legal cannabis industry, and they’re starting to figure out that you get what you pay for when it comes to pot, just like you do with everything else. I’m not sure. Either way, the cannabis culture is changing into something that values quality over the “let’s get high off something cheap” paradigm that ruled the world back when pot was sold in plastic bags on street corners.

And I can prove it—if you’re an uber pot-nerd and you’d like to read something proving that trends are changing, you can read a bona fide study HERE that was commissioned by the state’s Marijuana Enforcement Division to chart the changes in consumer purchasing trends. It shows exactly how the 302 metric tons (holy crap!) of cannabis that were sold in 2017 were allocated between flower and edibles and concentrates and whatnot. Granted, the study doesn’t delve into why the trends are changing, but it proves that they are.

But if you think about it, the “why” doesn’t really matter, and as an integral part of the legal cannabis community here in Colorado, it’s The Greenery’s job to take note of what consumers want and then provide it; that’s what we do. And this week, I wanted to write a post for all you connoisseurs out there and tell you about three top-end products that we’re selling for people with discerning tastes. Let’s get started…

1.) FSE Cartridges from Green Dot Labs.

Simply put, these are incredible. “FSE” stands for “full-spectrum extract,” which means that anything and everything you’ll find in the plant has made its way into these cartridges. Each of these carts is filled with 500mg of the purest, terpene-rich FSE on the market. Green Dot Labs uses in-house genetics for their carts (meaning they grow custom varietals to make the best concentrates) to provide Sativa, Indica, and Hybrid options. I never recommend this product for newbies because it gets you very high, but if you’re a connoisseur, this cartridge is for you because there honestly isn’t a better one on the planet.

2.) Boutique Flower from The Greenery Grow.

We really do grow the best pot in Durango. I’ve written about it before (for more, click HERE) because we’re so proud of our cultivation facility, but it’s all worth saying twice. We use good bugs to kill the bad bugs instead of using caustic pesticides; we pump CO2 particulates onto the fanleaves to increase photosynthesis; we use light-emitting ceramic bulbs that are better than the sun. We do everything possible to grow the highest-quality cannabis to ever grace this mountain town, so if you’re a connoisseur, it’s pointless to shop elsewhere.

3.) Artisanal Chocolate Truffles from Coda Signature.

Coda’s head chocolatier, Lauren Gockley, is one of the ten best in the nation, and I’m not just talking about chocolatiers who make cannabis edibles. This is one of those rare occasions wherein one of the best names in the culinary world decided to play her hand in the cannabis industry, and we’ve all won as a result. Coda’s chocolate can hold its own right alongside the best confections out there and it gets you high, which is a definite win-win. And the hand-painted truffles from Coda (which come in flavors like tiramisu, earl grey, passion fruit, and burnt caramel) are firmly in the connoisseur lane because they’re made from ethically-sourced chocolate, pure CO2 cannabis oil, and unrivaled artistry.

There you go. If you’re one of the discerning customers out there who values quality over thrift, you really should come into our Durango dispensary—we’re selling the best of the best, because if you’re a connoisseur, We’re Your Best Buds too!